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Runner the Russian Otter actually has a real story. I bought a beany baby otter about a year ago. I started making it talk like a Russian, hitting on this girl I knew with him. He wanted her to touch his tail, and get drunk off of his vodka. Well, Runner broke the ice and me and Jessica have been together since. I wouldn't be as happy as I am today without him.
So, Runner! I want you to go out there and kick some ass!