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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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EdgeCrusher,
It's coming. "Real Life" keeps interrupting things at the moment, so I'm a little slower than I would like. But the next chapter should be up in a day or two.
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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See! i'm not dead!
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i've had the poison leak into my skin
and it corroded my heart away
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President Jakjon
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Metro Area of NYC, New York, United States
Jan 2000
time: 05:13
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I'm alive too! (And I've got a mighty big hangover, but I got promoted!) Keep it coming, it's humorous without being blase. "The Forgotten Faction" sets a standard that we should strive to meet. I've got enough handwritten material to make chapter five, but I'm finally writing the interview scene, so I'm concentrating on that.
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--President Jakjon
--Datalinks
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Vi Vicdi
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Killeen, TX, USA
Nov 1999
time: 23:13
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Morgan's going shopping! We're doomed! LOL!
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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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A couple of brief comments about chapter 9. First, the reference to the "Purple Files" is kind of a nod to a favorite TV show of mine (I don't watch much TV, but this show was a favorite), "Babylon 5". In the U.S., this show is currently getting treated poorly by TNT, being show at 7AM or 8AM on Saturday mornings. Hey, that's why they invented VCRs. The show has appeared in Europe and Canada, and even made it to Australia. It's a "Sci-Fi" show that is actually a five-year novel for television. I highly recommend it. The first season of the show had some rough stuff, i.e., a few of the episodes weren't that good, but seasons three and four in particular were terrific.
Anyway, the "Purple Files" were what the Centauri used to keep track of potential rivals. I have one other "nod" to Babylon 5 coming up in the future. If you've watched the show and are familiar with the "B5 Universe", you'll know it when you see it.
Googlie, I would be honored to have this story appear in "Googlie's Garage". I've visited your site a few times, but haven't been there in the last couple of weeks. Now I have motivation to do so again. I've actually enjoyed using your "handles" quite a bit; Paula and Gayle are two of my favorite characters to write. I just hope that either the way I end up using them doesn't cause you too much schizophrenia, or that you at least know a good "head doctor"  .
I plan to use one other "handle" from the forum for a character in this story. I already have the handle picked and the character outlined. I won't tell you who the "lucky" winner is, but you will all be terribly envious when it finally occurs.
P. S. I am reading the other fiction in the forum, and I have to agree with the individual who suggested that most of the stuff in this forum is better than the SMACx that Firaxis was posting. Keep it coming!
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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is someone here a morgan player? mmm old Codger?
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i've had the poison leak into my skin
and it corroded my heart away
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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Actually, I'm not a real Morgan player. My first few attempts at playing Morgan ended in defeat, total defeat, and crushing defeat. I haven't tried him in recent times, but I think I could do a much better job with him now.
There are several reasons Morgan figures so prominently in the story line. First, there hasn't been a lot of fiction written about Morgan, at least not that I've read. Lots of people have written about the Gaians and the Spartans have their very own Chronicles. In many (maybe only a few?) storylines, Morgan spends most of his time getting crushed. Or so it seems anyway. Second, I didn't want to write a combat-heavy "blood-and-guts" story, at least not this time. How does one have conflict or problems to solve--a very essential ingredient of story-telling--without having a war? The way I chose to deal with this was to have an entirely different kind of "war", one that Morgan is well-qualified to fight. Third, I find the thought of a corporate-oriented society to be kind of fascinating. What would be important to these people? How would they behave? How would they view problems and solve them?
I really wish I had more time to work with Morganite society. I honestly don't think I've captured their "essence" yet.
However, I'll probably have to give the good CEO another go in the near future. I've learned a lot since the last time I tried him and could probably make a good attempt at it now. Besides, the only victory I've never done is the Economic victory. I reckon it's about time I had a go at it.
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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iMac722
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McCordsville,IN,US
Jan 2000
time: 05:13
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I personally like the story if you read my second stoy, The Ordinary People Im sure you'll like it and It also delves into the Forgotten faction Storyline so OldCoger I was thinkin we could work on our storylines together. So you can E-Mail me at Imac722@aol.com
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And I asked him,
What is thy name?
And he replied saying:
My Name is iMac: for we
are many..
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President Jakjon
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Metro Area of NYC, New York, United States
Jan 2000
time: 05:13
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In the chapter after next, I intend to write from the Morganite point-of-view. I hope you like my portrayal- and possibly glean some ideas from it. Hopefully, good ones too!
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--President Jakjon
--Datalinks
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Vi Vicdi
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Killeen, TX, USA
Nov 1999
time: 23:13
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I always get happy when I see "The Forgotten Faction" high up on the "recent" list. Sometimes I even drool with anticipation. Way cool! Keep up the good work!
Babylon 5:
I know what you mean. Some of those shows were so dumb you wanted to hurl, and you swore you'd never watch that stupid show again, and other times you're gripping the edge of your seat and wishing next week's episode would be next hour's instead.
On balance I don't think I would want to watch it all again, but it was worth seeing once.
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it's coming along nicely. keep up the good work.
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follow close, the train of fools
just like them, (could be) just like you
-their eyes don't seem right.
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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Maddog, I am glad you are enjoying the story. I'm finding that actually writing something like this is a bit more difficult to do than I originally thought it would be. However, I am having a lot of fun writing it.
If you thought the story was wierd or maybe a little crazy before, you ain't seen nothin' yet.
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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Bearcat
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Oregonia
Dec 1999
time: 05:13
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I like the story. It's getting really good. I especially liked the part with the Planet Cult.
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President Jakjon
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Metro Area of NYC, New York, United States
Jan 2000
time: 05:13
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I've read up to chapter twelve, and I think it's the best yet! Often, the portrayal of the Morganites has been too positive- yours, well, isn't. However, the Usurpers seemed a tad cowardly. These are beings "engineered for combat" after all. However, in general, their aggression was good. (Hey, my portrayal of the Believers is a bit positivist so far.)
My story... I've been writing, but I haven't transferred my draft to here. Eventually I'll post more...
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--President Jakjon
--Datalinks
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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Wow! I can't believe this comment thread is up to two pages! And filled with so many nice things!
A couple of brief comments:
First, the second "nod" to Babylon 5 has been posted. The description of Aki Zeta 5 as the fifth and final in the Aki Zeta series uses a description similar to that of the Babylon 5 space station.
Second, the character of Andrew Jasonian will be reappearing in the story line very soon. EdgeCrusher will also make another appearance or two. Both of these characters have somewhat pivotal roles in the remainder of the story. Gayle Storm and Paula Forbes are definitely in this for the long haul.
Third, all of the pieces are now in place to finish this tawdry little tale.
One of the things I've tried hard to do is to have each faction act in a manner that is fairly consistent with how they play in the game. For example, every time the Usurpers show up in a game I play, it seems like they always get to Doctrine: Air Power way before anyone else. Brother Lal is about as stable as water. But, I'm trying to give an even handed protrayal of their motivations as well. Each faction is capable of aiming for some "higher cause", yet each is capable of "baser" instincts as well. Thus, to me it is entirely consistent that Miriam might be concerned on the one hand with wrestling with the idea of having no moral right to subjugate the Hillbillies, wanting to convert them to save their souls, and yet wanting to subjugate them because of a very real threat to her own faction, and then also "happening to notice" that in accomplishing that goal, it would make hers the dominant faction. Similarly, Morgan sees the Usurpers as a very real threat--and they are, just ask the Hive and the Free Drones--and drawing the conclusion that what is good for the Morganites is also good for humanity on Chiron. Nevertheless, the Morganites are not warriors, so they will choose an approach more suited to their way of thinking. Similarly, what matters to the University and Believers will be different and therefore their approach will be different as well. The fact that all three approaches would "happen" to make that faction dominant is simply serendipity to them.
As far as the Usurpers are concerned, I don't think my portrayal of them is cowardly at all. There are "themes and patterns" in the way each faction behaves and what each leader does, that I don't really want to describe just now, but will once the story is completed. Suffice it to say that to me anyway, Conqueror Marr's behavior is very consistent. The Usurpers have conquered two human factions already. He knows how the leader of a conquered faction is treated. He knows that he has lost the best part of his military. He therefore sees himself as a giant target. What he thinks he knows about this situation indicates to him that he is clearly and most definitely beaten. The only question he needs to answer is how much blood does he want to shed before he is either destroyed or taken captive. I suppose suicide would be an option, but that would mean yielding victory to the hated Caretakers. So, from his point of view, his options are to either get his faction eradicated, or try to find another way to achieve victory. There would be no victory in death. This way, he still has a shot at something.
Obviously, everyone will have a somewhat different view of how the various factions "ought" to behave. That's quite all right. The key in writing about them is to have a clear view yourself and keep them consistent. This is one of the things I like in "The Wizard of Chiron"--which I am really enjoying and think is a particularly good piece of writing. Raging Mouse has a different view of Zhakarov than I do. My Zhakarov is a bit arrogant and short-tempered. The Zhakarov of Raging Mouse is much more even-tempered. His Cybernetic Consciousness is much "darker" than mine; I find them rather disturbing. But they are consistent and they have motives that I can understand and relate to in some way. I'm very anxious to see what he does with the other factions.
I hope to see some of the other stories resume as well. The Timescape story was getting interesting. Hydro's story was very well done and interesting. The Drone story was also getting very interesting. The key thing in all of these stories is the characters. Good stories need characters that are consistent--and inconsistent as well--and characters the reader can get to know and be concerned about. Put them in a set of challenging circumstances and weave a tale around them. Let them "do the right thing" and let them make mistakes. Let them choose the moral high ground and then be mean and petty. If this is accomplished, the reader will gladly follow them through trials and tribulations.
I guess it's time to get out of my pulpit. Writing for Sister Miriam somehow gives me a strong urge to preach .
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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iMac722
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McCordsville,IN,US
Jan 2000
time: 05:13
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Its great I cant wait to see what will happen when the planet Cult comes to the hillbillies.
Oh and also I'm planning on making a "Forgotten Faction Scenario based on this story and I need to know where the factions would placed.
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OldCodger
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Columbus, OH, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Just bumping this thread back up to more recent times.
Perhaps you will never look at Cha Dawn the same?
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Old age and treachery: the perfect cure for youth and ambition...
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VEL!!!!! you're back! coolness.
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i've become impossible
holding on to when
when everything seemed to matter more
the two of us
all used and beaten up
watching fate as it flows down the path we
have chose
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06-03-2000 18:38
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