02-12-2003 07:57									#1
	Why math is taught in school Increase Your PM Length

Why They Teach Math in School
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck. The guy had to drive on to the shoulder to avoid hitting the woman.

This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and "flipped" the woman off.

"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself.

I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.

That's 96 miles each day.

Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper.

Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.

There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.

That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.

Statistically, females drive half of these.

That's 18,000 women drivers!
In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.

That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.

That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.

That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.

That's 33.

According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons, and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Flip one off? ... I think not!

	02-12-2003 08:10									#2
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Cosmpolitan?

*sounds of toilet flushing*

	02-12-2003 08:56									#3
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Nice one

	02-12-2003 09:19									#4
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Americans and their guns.

In civilised countries, women use chainsaws.

	02-12-2003 09:24									#5
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Well, civilized like Canada doesn't mean much (just kidding)

	02-12-2003 09:31									#6
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Shut up. Canada invented civilisation. Greece, Sumer, and China ripped us off.

	02-12-2003 09:55									#7
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You're wrong -- we ripped civilization off from the Martians.

	02-12-2003 09:58									#8
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How does a drive by Chainsawing work?

	02-12-2003 11:13									#9
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So, to vaguely change back to the topic...

I bought groceries today. I ended up in line behind a man who spent a couple of minutes arguing with the clerk. She finally ended up calling over her supervisor. Generally something like this would annoy me. However this fellows gripe was about not receiving a 10% discount on a remedial math workbook. The clerk was trying to explain to him that the $8.95 book would still cost him $8.06 after the discount. He ended up not buying it.

	02-12-2003 11:19									#10
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quote: Originally posted by Uncle Sparky However this fellows gripe was about not receiving a 10% discount on a remedial math workbook.

And they say irony is dead....

	02-12-2003 11:21									#11
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@ US's story

	02-12-2003 12:41									#12
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quote: Originally posted by Vesayen And they say irony is dead....

	02-12-2003 14:03									#13
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quote: How does a drive by Chainsawing work?

Intimidation mostly.

	02-12-2003 17:00									#14
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quote: Originally posted by Whoha How does a drive by Chainsawing work?

	02-12-2003 18:35									#15
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Your maths is flawed. Just because you have calculated that there are so many cars around you at certain times, you have failed to take account of the fact that for the vast majority of your journey, all of these cars will be the same. Furthermore, your percentages do not work in the way you use them. So overall, you drive past no women every day with each of the conditions on your list. (To take account of the trus statistical figure, like to be a small fraction, I'm prepared to grant you one pre-op transsexual with all these conditions per week but no more).

	02-12-2003 18:42									#16
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quote: Originally posted by Uncle Sparky The clerk was trying to explain to him that the $8.95 book would still cost him $8.06 after the discount. He ended up not buying it.

4/3 persons don't understand a word in math.

	02-12-2003 19:16									#17
	Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

AS duke said, the OP was flawed in many ways, but I think it wasn't meant to be serious in any case