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Asmodean is offline Asmodean
King
Aarhus, Denmark
Aug 1999
time: 06:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 03:05 Visit Asmodean's homepage!
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Pour the water from the potatoes - Urinating

Give birth to an arm - Take a dump


And for the topic of this thread:

Most women I have known said: "I am having my things"

Asmodean
Lazarus and the Gimp is offline Lazarus and the Gimp
King
Whale-raping abomination
Aug 2000
time: 05:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 03:47
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Producing a bowel movement of exceptional length = "Laying a transatlantic cable".
-Jrabbit is offline -Jrabbit
Emperor
of the Electronic Egyptians
Feb 2002
time: 23:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 04:35
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Put an end to popups!

very, uh, visual, Laz...
Dauphin is offline Dauphin
Emperor
Caught in a tuna net
Jan 1970
time: 05:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 05:18
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When asked at work about his bloodshot eyes, induced through bong usage, a housemate claimed that its because he had just had a shower.

Having a shower is now a common euphamism for smoking weed.
Dauphin is offline Dauphin
Emperor
Caught in a tuna net
Jan 1970
time: 05:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 05:27
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Another commonly refered to house (sexual) euphamism is 'feeding the horse'.
orange is offline orange
Emperor
It doesn't matter what your name is!
Feb 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 05:32 Visit orange's homepage!
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"Mt. Vesuterus has erupted"
self biased is offline self biased
King
Yggdrasil.
Nov 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 06:35 Visit self biased's homepage!
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"making a sacrifice to the tiki god." = taking a dump.

this actually has a story behind it. sort of. at my freinds camp there's this outhouse with a door carved like a tiki mask. during a night of drinking, i get up and stumble towards the outhouse to 'lay some transatlantic cable,' and someone said, "where ya goin?" "the tiki god demands sacrifice," i replied.
Shogun Gunner is offline Shogun Gunner
Emperor
Potomac Falls, Virginia
Oct 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 07:01 Visit Shogun Gunner<br><a href=/members><img src=/forums/images/supporter-icon.gif border=0></a><BR>'s homepage!
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hmmm... mixing a euphemism.... I guess that's not as bad as mixing a metaphor.
St Leo is offline St Leo
King of Scenario League
Member of the Apolyton Social Democratic Party
Jul 2005
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 07:19 Visit St Leo<br><img src=/forums/images/staff-icon.gif>'s homepage!
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"Menstruating".
Guynemer is offline Guynemer
King

Donate to the Red Cross		 Gotta have more cowbell!
Mar 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 08:04
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Defecation--"dropping the kids off at the pool."
Verto is offline Verto
King

Mar 2002
time: 23:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 08:17
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Doesn't this thread violate some kind of health code?
St Leo is offline St Leo
King of Scenario League
Member of the Apolyton Social Democratic Party
Jul 2005
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 08:31 Visit St Leo<br><img src=/forums/images/staff-icon.gif>'s homepage!
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Leviticus doesn't count as a real health code.
Alinestra Covelia is offline Alinestra Covelia
Queen
I sense the dodgy presence of Bing - a presence I've not felt since...
Feb 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 22:12
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Masturbation euphemisms are cool too. The only problem is that I don't know many ones for female masturbation.

Gusset typing
Airing the orchid
Double clicking on the mouse
Paddling the pink canoe (until it leaks)

Gosh, this sounds like some 1960s guitar trio songlist.
Lazarus and the Gimp is offline Lazarus and the Gimp
King
Whale-raping abomination
Aug 2000
time: 05:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 22:16
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Slapping the pony.
Theben is offline Theben
Emperor
Dance Dance for the Revolution!
Jan 1970
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 22:19
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'Rolling out the red carpet', for the menstruation thingy.
gunkulator is offline gunkulator
Prince

Feb 2003
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 23:43
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My favorite: "Looks like it's bj week".

Too bad I don't hear it all that often.
Shogun Gunner is offline Shogun Gunner
Emperor
Potomac Falls, Virginia
Oct 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 09-12-2003 23:45 Visit Shogun Gunner<br><a href=/members><img src=/forums/images/supporter-icon.gif border=0></a><BR>'s homepage!
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i mentioned "beating the bishop" before for a masterbation one...

What about

waxing the dolphin
grappeling with the one eyed snake
tossing webbing
Gangerolf is offline Gangerolf
Prince
huuhh
May 2001
time: 06:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 00:26
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getting laid: "Get a fur [coat] on the hook"

masturbate: "lure the salmon"

Oh well. They don't translate too well but they're hilarious in norwegian, I promise!
Gangerolf is offline Gangerolf
Prince
huuhh
May 2001
time: 06:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 00:33
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urinate: "walk the monster", "combat drought"

vomit: "feed the fishes/doves/ducks/mice" (depends on where you are) or simply "fertilise" <- this one can be used about urinating or defecating as well.
Gangerolf is offline Gangerolf
Prince
huuhh
May 2001
time: 06:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 00:34
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A hotdog: "C*ck in a canoe"
CorpusScorpius is offline CorpusScorpius
Chieftain
Houston,Tx
Nov 2000
time: 23:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 02:43
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Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

Heard you ate lunch twice= vomitting
epicurian is offline epicurian
Settler
Liverpool
Dec 2003
time: 05:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 05:18 Visit epicurian's homepage!
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Anyone interested in locating a really good source of sweary and otherwise hilariously inventive and foulmouthed euphemisms would be well advised to get a copy of 'Rogers Profanisauris'. It is a swearing dictionary published by the makers of Viz. (For anyone who doesn't know, Viz is a humoursous comic printed in England, though I think it is also sold in the U.S.A. , the website is quite fun too). It also got a foreword by Terry Jones out of Monty Python as well.
Within can be found euphemisms such as:
Boxing the Jesuit,
Strangling Kojak,
throttling captain Picard. As well as others on a wide variety of topics.
Japher is offline Japher
Prince
Ook! Ook! Ack! Ack! Ack!
Jun 2002
time: 05:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 05:25
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Lonestar is offline Lonestar
Prince
AECCP Dark Lord of the Sith
Aug 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 05:37 Visit Lonestar's homepage!
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Stroking the Weasel.
Bosh is offline Bosh
Emperor
Taehan Mingook
Jan 1970
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 05:47
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Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

"riding the pink line"
OzzyKP is offline OzzyKP
King
Rockville, MD
Oct 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 07:03 Visit OzzyKP's homepage!
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On a date with Miss Michigan
or
On a date with Rosy Palms & her 5 sisters.
Alinestra Covelia is offline Alinestra Covelia
Queen
I sense the dodgy presence of Bing - a presence I've not felt since...
Feb 2000
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 07:54
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Epicurian, looks like you're my type of foul-mouthed Hive citizen.

Together we can both properly control the drones, and turn the Chironian air blue.

So there I was, gnoshing away at a real Easter-islander, when suddenly he gives me dirty yogurt. I thought I was going to speak Welsh.

LONG LIVE THE CHAIRMAN.
OzzyKP is offline OzzyKP
King
Rockville, MD
Oct 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 09:13 Visit OzzyKP's homepage!
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Munch Carpet
OzzyKP is offline OzzyKP
King
Rockville, MD
Oct 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 09:14 Visit OzzyKP's homepage!
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Tonsil Hockey

Pocket Pool
self biased is offline self biased
King
Yggdrasil.
Nov 1999
time: 00:32
  Old Post 10-12-2003 13:08 Visit self biased's homepage!
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.... riiiiiiiiiiight.
 
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