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Apolyton Civilization Forums > Miscellaneous > Archive > Off-Topic-Archive > Terms in music reviews that make the warning lights go up.

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Stefu

Emperor

CLOWNS WIT DA DOWNS 4 LIFE YO!
Jan 1970
time: 07:32

10-12-2003 19:40

Terms in music reviews that make the warning lights go up.

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Now, music reviews can be and often are self-absorbed masturbationery and a mean for aging Gen-Xers and Boomers to prove that hey, they know more about the music than the modern youth so there. However, when you learn to read the code, there's a lots of useful information. For instance, the adjective 'wistful' is music-reviewese code for "A 'man' mewls about love like a neutered kitten while the rest of the band strums acoustic guitars or makes ambient noises and NOTHING F*CKING HAPPENS." Thus, one should steer clear of such bands.

What other such warning signs do the reviews offer?

Park Avenue

Emperor

Liberal and defender of freedoms for the people
Oct 1999
time: 05:32

10-12-2003 19:43

Get a bigger avatar today!

Experimental. Usually just means a few triangles tinkling in the background, use of dodgy keyboards, or mixing musical styles which go together about as well as milk and beer.

Dis

Emperor

Las Vegas, Nevada
Feb 2000
time: 21:32

11-12-2003 12:04

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generally they tend to make the most crappy albums sound good.

music reviews are all crap

aaglo

King

the contradiction is filled with holes...
Aug 2001
time: 07:32

11-12-2003 12:09

Increase the size of your Attachments

I don't know. I don't read music rewievs. I want to listen to the music myself and make the decision based on that (not some wimpy review from a wimpy mag)

Imran Siddiqui

Deity

The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:32

11-12-2003 12:37

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quote:
What other such warning signs do the reviews offer?

Well, if it's written by Snapcase (*ahem* Buck Birdseed), that's usually a big warning sign.... for the review

Sikander

King

Boulder, Colorado, United Snakes of America
Jan 2000
time: 22:32

11-12-2003 14:14

Remove this text

quote:
Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui

quote:
What other such warning signs do the reviews offer?

Well, if it's written by Snapcase (*ahem* Buck Birdseed), that's usually a big warning sign.... for the review

Thanks for saving me the trouble of writing that.