15-01-2004 17:43									#1
	Funniest break up line I have ever heard. Put an end to popups!

Sorry, but I had to share this really funny quote with you guys. I had a pretty nasty breakup with my partner a few days ago. We were arguing about it on my door step today, I was halfway between screaming and crying when they said the funniest thing I had ever heard. I went from crying to laughing out loud.


"What do you mean how can I be this upset? You had sex with
another man on our Anniversary!" "I'm sorry, I didn't know
it was our anniversary" - Jaime Grey 14/01/04


Sorry. but I had to share that. if anyone else has any funny breaking up lines, I would love to hear them.

Last edited by Blisterz on 15-01-2004 at 17:50

	15-01-2004 19:09									#2
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"You have a big head."

	15-01-2004 20:09									#3
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I wanted to give this thread a second post just to make Blisterz feel a little better about his own thread.

	15-01-2004 20:45									#4
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Roses are red
Violets are blue
Garbage is dumped
And so are you

	15-01-2004 20:46									#5
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"Welcome to Dumpsville: population: you!"

Hey, at least you got a break up. My last bf went AWOL for 3 months. Stings!

	15-01-2004 21:16									#6
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quote: Originally posted by ixnay Roses are red Violets are blue Garbage is dumped And so are you

very poetic

	15-01-2004 21:18									#7
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My wife and I had agreed to separate and she then spent a while still under my roof while sorting out a new home. We thought it would help ease my daughter through the changes which needed to take place if the new house was all sorted before we told her what was to happen.

Anyway the time came when the new house was bought and furnished and so on and Angela told me the day on which she had made her arrangements to move.

And the day was our wedding anniversary.

To this day I don't think she has ever realised.

All these years later I write this without any particular pang. But at the time some salt certainly got rubbed into a wound.

Music hall jokes being what they are it has sometimes occurred to me to wonder if this may represent the only occasion known to humankind on which the woman forgot a wedding anniversary and the husband remembered it.

I sent some flowers to her new house and, for a moment, thought of putting a "Happy Anniversary" card in.

But, for once, the chance of a laugh didn't seem quite worth it somehow.

	15-01-2004 21:26									#8
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Trader: Ouch!

	15-01-2004 22:03									#9
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Yeah, ouch. My anniversary is Jan 3rd. With all the confusion around the holidays, it is not unusual that I remember and she forgets. Trust me, it's a heck of a lot more fun when you are the one that didn't forget.
I have milked this for all it's worth quite a few times.

	15-01-2004 22:18									#10
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DP

	15-01-2004 22:18									#11
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No risk that i would forget my anniversary. I had a bad first date with my gf and then another one when she basically said that things would not work out between us.
But then, i got a "lucky" break as the next day was the day of the big blackout, last August 14. I was already home on Quebec's side when the power went off. She lives in Ontario. Like a lot of people that day she crossed over to Quebec to get something to eat since we never lost power.
She didn't want to eat alone so she gave me a call. She says now that she did it because she wanted to let me down easy. But i just wooed her off her feet i guess. Since there was no point in her going back to her place early i took her to a place where we could talk and "seduced" her. Since there was no - or little -power for the next days, we spent a nice week getting to know each other.

	16-01-2004 10:29									#12
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After a particularly nasty break up some years ago we were arguing in the car and had decided to call it quits and I was asked "don't I even get a good bye fuc* for old times sake........to which I responded as I got out of the car ( in the process of slamming the door).....sure honey......GOOD BYE FUC*!!!"

	16-01-2004 11:37									#13
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Can we talk about bad first date experiences??


One of my friends told me about a particularly bad first date experience with a new guy. It was raining fast and hard, and they were on the road -- my friend's car blew a tire, so he had to get out in the inclement weather, and asked his new date for him to come out and help.

The selfish jerk said that he just bought a pair of $150 shoes, and didn't want to come out to help, so he stayed in the car!! Needless to say, my friend did not go on a second date with him.

	16-01-2004 11:43									#14
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EST: ouch!

Richelieu: lucky man!

	16-01-2004 13:07									#15
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I heard of a Swedish guy who was on car holiday Italy with his family. He was arguing with his wife in the car and they decided to find a hotel to rest for the night and talk it out. He dropped off the family in the lobby, got a room and went out to park the car in a better place. But he took a wrong turn and was back on the expressway. He had to drive many kms before he could turn, but then he had forgotten the name of the hotel and didn't find his way back. He was driving around and looking for two days before he found the hotel again. By then, his wife had already taken the train home and filed a divorce application at the court.

	16-01-2004 16:38									#16
	Re: Funniest break up line I have ever heard. Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

quote: Originally posted by Blisterz Sorry, but I had to share this really funny quote with you guys. I had a pretty nasty breakup with my partner a few days ago. We were arguing about it on my door step today, I was halfway between screaming and crying when they said the funniest thing I had ever heard. I went from crying to laughing out loud. "What do you mean how can I be this upset? You had sex with another man on our Anniversary!" "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was our anniversary" - Jaime Grey 14/01/04 Sorry. but I had to share that. if anyone else has any funny breaking up lines, I would love to hear them.

man, that sucks. Im sorry, but i was more upset by that than entertained. What did you do to the guy?

	16-01-2004 21:23									#17
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That couple must have been gay...no straight man would ever remember an anniversary

	16-01-2004 22:02									#18
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quote: Can we talk about bad first date experiences??

I heard one about this guy who was on a first date with another guy, and guy1 asked guy2 if he saw another date in the future, and guy2 thought he was a freak for asking that! Isn't that strange?

	16-01-2004 22:22									#19
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What do lesbians bring to the second date?

A. - A U-Haul.

What do gay men bring to the second date?

A. - What second date?

	17-01-2004 09:43									#20
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[QUOTE] Originally posted by MrFun
Can we talk about bad first date experiences??


I have a bad first date line for ya.


"Dear God man, What the hell do you want me to do with that thing!? put it on my shoulder and burp it? "

and later on in the night after a little accident (some of you wont understand)

"**** man, sorry, I am going to have to wear I diaper for a week"

Last edited by Blisterz on 17-01-2004 at 09:49

	17-01-2004 10:17									#21
	Re: Re: Funniest break up line I have ever heard. Full PM-box? Change here!

quote: Originally posted by Kramerman man, that sucks. Im sorry, but i was more upset by that than entertained. What did you do to the guy?

How can you not find that funny? He was dumb enough to think I as upset about the anniversary.

This part is not funny he messaged me from his house telling me he was too drunk to come pick me up tonight, so he would see me tomorrow. So I wanted to surprise him. I walked almost two hours to get to the house, and and I get closer I hear moaning from half way across the lawn. I went to the window and could barely see anything, enough to know what was going on, I am not the kind of guy to throw a fit and make a big scene I was crushed. I started to walk home, I got almost and hour home and I guess being in shock and not wanting to believe that anything was happening, and that maybe that was other people in there (alot of people use his house as their second home) So I walked all the way back,. this time I went to the window on the other side of the room, this Time I saw everything. Now seeing another guys balls on your partners chin on your anniversary puts a wee damper on the occasion. I left a note on the window that said " I see you" with a pair of eyes".

He showed up here late the next day, drunk out of his tree, begging for me to let him in, and that is when he said it.

I know two One is a girl and one is a guy, and they both havre a habit of 'being on a "diet" and still ordering from menu.' if you get my drift

	17-01-2004 10:19									#22
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Not a break-up line, but a turned-down line that I got hit with:

"You're so charming, but in a completely asexual way."

	17-01-2004 19:26									#23
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quote: Originally posted by Tiamat After a particularly nasty break up some years ago we were arguing in the car and had decided to call it quits and I was asked "don't I even get a good bye fuc* for old times sake........to which I responded as I got out of the car ( in the process of slamming the door).....sure honey......GOOD BYE FUC*!!!"

I thought you were more of a hello fuc*.

	17-01-2004 19:45									#24
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Oooooh, bad first date experiences? I've got one.

The first date I ever had. My first timid step into the world of dating, dining, romancing, etc. Was with this bi-guy a friend had introduced me to. Never. Ever. Ever. Date a bisexual. Unless they are certain about their sexuality. In fact, just don't deal romantically/sexually with bisexuals at all. Stick to purebred homosexuals. Why? Well, a week after this date, the mutual friend tells me "yeah, he said it was interesting but he's gonna stick to dating women for now."

	18-01-2004 03:09									#25
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quote: Originally posted by Starchild Well, a week after this date, the mutual friend tells me "yeah, he said it was interesting but he's gonna stick to dating women for now."

OUCH

	18-01-2004 03:47									#26
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"I cant go out wit joo no more cause you too ugly"

True story. I was there when he said it. Man, my first year of college in that suite..... crazy.

	18-01-2004 16:21									#27
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun OUCH

And people wonder why I'm cynical.

	18-01-2004 22:38									#28
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Oh, but wait StarChilid -- it's politically incorrect to not want to date bisexuals, remember??

	19-01-2004 05:02									#29
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Smookie, when it comes to my love life, political correctness can immolate itself in the uncaring fires of my cold, rocky chunk of ice I call a heart.

	20-01-2004 08:14									#30
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quote: Originally posted by Starchild Smookie, when it comes to my love life, political correctness can immolate itself in the uncaring fires of my cold, rocky chunk of ice I call a heart.

My sentiments exactly.