28-01-2004 00:48									#91
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SF's gotta be top5 or 10, though. My nephew (1/2 nephew, only 6mos younger than I am) lives out there now, and he was telling me about the cost of houses/apartments. It's absolutely insane. It makes CT look like a bargain.

-Arrian

	28-01-2004 00:56									#92
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Oh I have heard it is insane, I believe it is top 5 in the world for expensive property. Alas I am not stuck up though. Despite this impression I can give online, I am easier going in real life. It doesn't mean I am not confident in my abilities however. But in some ways I just want to get on with life...that seems to be quite difficult at times.

	28-01-2004 00:56									#93
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I'm fixing to get out of here ASAP... only now my company is offering me some training that will greatly bolster my resume...

	28-01-2004 00:59									#94
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I'm not saying your stuck up, your the one who think that...

It is hard to initiate a change, ppl are scare of it... You just need to swallow your fears and do it. You can't be successful by doing everything for everyone else, you have to realize that your in this world alone... No one will mind if you up and move to advance yourself.

	28-01-2004 01:15									#95
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I know what you mean but I need a certain amount of security to be able to do that, I do have debts and expenditures that will need to be covered. In some ways I'm hopeful, in others I just know how things seem to go...they live in conflict.

	28-01-2004 01:47									#96
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Provost must leave the North because the North hates him.

	28-01-2004 01:51									#97
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It's not that the North hates me per se, but just that there is nothing here for me any more. Every turn has been a dead end, a blind alley. Any gifts have turned out to be poison chalice - my Ph.D being a prime example of that. It all seems a little surreal to be fair, how such a string of events can occur, seemingly defying statistics...but there you go...

	28-01-2004 01:57									#98
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Why doesn't Park Avenue like gay people? It sounds like overcompensation sweetheart...

	28-01-2004 02:03									#99
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That's what everyone says about him...and not without an element of truth...

	28-01-2004 02:05									#100
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and there was me thinking (being told over and over again by... Provost! ) the south was less friendly than THE NORTH

	28-01-2004 02:07									#101
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In many ways it is...but on the other side of the coin, it is often less accommodating and accepting...

	28-01-2004 02:09									#102
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quote: Originally posted by Provost Harrison It's not that the North hates me per se, but just that there is nothing here for me any more. Every turn has been a dead end, a blind alley. Any gifts have turned out to be poison chalice - my Ph.D being a prime example of that. It all seems a little surreal to be fair, how such a string of events can occur, seemingly defying statistics...but there you go...

Right - the North hates you Provost. You have the distinction of being hated by an entire region of a country.

	28-01-2004 15:47									#103
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Whereas you have the distinction of being hated by an entire planet EXCEPT a region of a country...

	28-01-2004 16:23									#104
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quote: Originally posted by Provost Harrison It's not that the North hates me per se, but just that there is nothing here for me any more. Every turn has been a dead end, a blind alley. Any gifts have turned out to be poison chalice - my Ph.D being a prime example of that. It all seems a little surreal to be fair, how such a string of events can occur, seemingly defying statistics...but there you go...

So go somewhere else. Life is about choices like that - either do something about it or sit and whine. If you choose the second option do it on your own time.



Yes, I know I'm taking a hard line here but I have done the sit and put up with it approach (not whined though) and (in my not so humble experience) it doesn't change anything. So do something about it and don't let ideas like "I can't afford it" stop you - it is about trying to create opportunities and recognising and taking them when they come. We're back to attitude again.

	28-01-2004 16:27									#105
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PH still sounds depressed, which doesn't help much.

	28-01-2004 16:40									#106
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quote: Originally posted by Provost Harrison It's not that the North hates me per se, but just that there is nothing here for me any more. Every turn has been a dead end, a blind alley. Any gifts have turned out to be poison chalice - my Ph.D being a prime example of that. It all seems a little surreal to be fair, how such a string of events can occur, seemingly defying statistics...but there you go...

Life likes to throw a series of challenges at a man.

I know just how you feel, it seems as if the odds are ill-fated and highly racked against you sometimes.

But you can always win, be persistent!

It's not your environment you have to change, it's you!

Find an advantage to each situation, if something goes not work the way you want, a different goal awaits you.

Cheesy pep-talk I know, but I have been there, and I am still dodging the crap life hurls at me.

I plan to win, and I will!

You can too!

	28-01-2004 17:10									#107
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A trick I have - although one I haven't had to resort to much in recent years - is that when I am in any danger of feeling sorry for myself or fed up I do a quick stocktake of what I have to be pleased about and what I have to be fed up about.

But I never actually get to the fed up part. Because once I start by acknowledging that it is a boon to be alive rather than dead (which I have always thought), that it is splendid to have people to love and to love me, that I am a free man, that it is great to be healthier, warmer, better fed and better clothed than any human being who ever lived before me - why it really seems a bit trivial to start listing out bits and pieces of disappointment about job or social life or ways in which I could be yet more embarassingly privileged than I already am.

A serious illness or being really lonely or being enslaved would weigh in scales such as these but I don't read your posts as suggesting those things apply to you, Provost.

So if you tried an EST stocktake it might well turn out that you too have a pretty healthy plus balance.

In which case my fee will be the cumulative value of all the shrinks and pills you get to save.

	28-01-2004 17:17									#108
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That's actually kind of a bit like a cognitive therapy exercise.

	28-01-2004 17:46									#109
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*kick*

	28-01-2004 19:58									#110
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I suggest you start to eat more healthily and sleep a better number of hours Rich. Go to bed at 10:30 and get up at 7:00 each day. Make sure you get plenty of oily fish and fruit and veg.

	28-01-2004 20:01									#111
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Now that sounds like really good advice.

I wonder why it is so hard actually to do such simple things?

	28-01-2004 20:03									#112
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Because his mum shops for him still?

	29-01-2004 02:12									#114
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quote: Originally posted by Japher I'm not saying your stuck up, your the one who think that... It is hard to initiate a change, ppl are scare of it... You just need to swallow your fears and do it. You can't be successful by doing everything for everyone else, you have to realize that your in this world alone... No one will mind if you up and move to advance yourself.

I bet your wife still believes you should do everything for her, all the time.

	29-01-2004 02:39									#115
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she can believe what she wants, but she better listen to what I tell her:

	29-01-2004 02:44									#116
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quote: Originally posted by Provost Harrison

Here's some Antipodean cognitive therapy-

when you're alone and life is making you worry, just remember- you could live in Wales and be Park Avenue.

Alternatively, you could always go downtown, where the neon lights are pretty, but don't sleep in the subway or the pouring rain.

(guest life coach- Petula Clark)

	29-01-2004 03:29									#117
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quote: Originally posted by molly bloom you could live in Wales and be Park Avenue.

What if you do live in Wales and you are Park Avenue?

	29-01-2004 03:39									#118
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The solution involves a revolver, five minutes of privacy, and a membership card of the Anti Nazi League.

	29-01-2004 03:40									#119
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quote: Originally posted by CerberusIV What if you do live in Wales and you are Park Avenue?

A poem by Dorothy Parker comes to mind, but I'd change the ending from 'live' to 'die'.

And add the suffix, 'soon'.

	29-01-2004 04:01									#120
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quote: Originally posted by Park Avenue Because his mum shops for him still?

I'm getting exasperated here. The guy can always go home for a breather if he finds city life too tough. So what has he got to lose?

It's probably the underlying depression that's holding him back.