06-02-2005 14:01									#1
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I was visiting a couple tonight whom I'm pretty close to, and had a really good time.

However, I found something rather odd. They have two kids, both 20 months, and quite fond of me.

The odd part was when both of them wanted to sit on my lap. I didn't quite know how to respond to that, and it felt quite awkward. I've babysat before, but I didn't realise how I'd gotten used to my personal space over the last while.

Has anyone felt the same, when dealing with small children?

	06-02-2005 14:42									#2
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The only thing you need to worry about is avoiding getting your knackers stood on.

	06-02-2005 14:44									#3
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No, it was odd to even notice that at all. Never felt that way before.

Guess that's a consequence of living on my own.

	06-02-2005 16:54									#4
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I would feel like a child molester having kids sit on my lap. I hate the way society has sexualised all physical contact. Thank goodness for pets, with whom cravings for non-sexual physical contact can be achieved.

	06-02-2005 16:57									#5
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quote: Originally posted by Comrade Tassadar They were scared that you were going to send bears after them.

	06-02-2005 17:07									#6
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Kids sometimes want to do that.. I've had few kids on my lap as well... I guess I have a lap like that. Everyone wants to sit in it. My friends little brother when he was very little wanted always to sit on my lap. THe last time he got on my lap was when he accidentally peed on me. YEah. He peed on me accidentally. DAMN! True story.

	06-02-2005 17:09									#7
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quote: Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp The only thing you need to worry about is avoiding getting your knackers stood on.

Oh ain't that a fact. Kids, no matter how little their knowledge of anatomy may be, seem to home in towards your groinal region and cause great amount of pain.

No, it's just you Ben, I think that sounds lovely

	06-02-2005 17:12									#8
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But I guess kids feel that sitting on someones lap is nice because it's warm and comfortable, where it might not be comfortable to the lap. Of course, there must be some basic trust that they want to do, I mean kids don't want to be sitting on stranger lap unless they feel good about it. So you know, since you are friend of the family, they like you and that's just fine.

And hells yeah it's a bit weird if it's someone you don't know too well, like your own kid you know. But just take it as a compliment, and that the kids like you. If they don't like you, they won't want to sit on your lap. And if the parents let them sit on your lap, well then they like and trust you too. It's just like having an animal in your lap, don't do sudden moves or freak out . And it's different kind of closeness, because it's something kids do so .. it's not every day you come across to that situation and so it doesn't feel very natural at first.

	06-02-2005 17:14									#9
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No Pekka, I'm referring to the feet when they are jumping around

	06-02-2005 17:18									#10
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Uhh.. ok. I wasn't replying to your perversimum maximus posts . Besides it's the cats that stomp your woolieboolies all the time.

	06-02-2005 18:52									#11
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My six year old has discovered that he can actually win play fighting if he hits me in the balls.

Kids are little ****ers sometimes. When the bug you it's ok to tell them to go play or something. If their parents are there they should do that.

	06-02-2005 21:09									#12
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quote: Originally posted by Bkeela I would feel like a child molester having kids sit on my lap. I hate the way society has sexualised all physical contact. Thank goodness for pets, with whom cravings for non-sexual physical contact can be achieved.

It´s not society that´s ****ed up. It´s you

	06-02-2005 22:39									#13
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I say go ahead and just do it Ben. Little kids are soft and fuzzy and warm. Getting used to dandling them on your knees will develop your nurturing side and restore your humanity.

	07-02-2005 00:54									#14
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I could lend him my mate's kid. Within 5 minutes Ben would be warming to the idea of abortion.

	07-02-2005 02:04									#15
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I have four nephews from 1 to 4,5 years old. They have pretty much vaccinated me from the urge to have my own "bundles of joy"

	07-02-2005 02:27									#16
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Some people need to drink a lot less, then they wouldn't be so irritable.

	07-02-2005 02:28									#17
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quote: Originally posted by Bkeela Thank goodness for pets, with whom cravings for non-sexual physical contact can be achieved.

Yeah, with lots of hard work and determination...

	07-02-2005 04:53									#18
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I have three little brothers, I'm 20, they're now 17, 12 and 7 so fairly used to small kids running around. Personal space simply doesn't happen. It's an alien concept, like oestrogen.

	07-02-2005 05:59									#19
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quote: Originally posted by Pekka Uhh.. ok. I wasn't replying to your perversimum maximus posts . Besides it's the cats that stomp your woolieboolies all the time.

Well that is your sick mind working there, not mine. I know I can be one for the filthy gags but this is one topic I do stay clear of in that respect (except for Wacko Jacko or Gary Glitter jokes )

quote: Originally posted by Bkeela I would feel like a child molester having kids sit on my lap. I hate the way society has sexualised all physical contact. Thank goodness for pets, with whom cravings for non-sexual physical contact can be achieved.

Don't be utterly ridiculous. Kids, and pets, do need high levels of physical affection, they need to be reassured and comforted. This paedophile witch hunt is causing another problem which could have serious ramifications for our future generations...

	07-02-2005 09:48									#20
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quote: If they don't like you, they won't want to sit on your lap. And if the parents let them sit on your lap, well then they like and trust you too.

Yeah, the kids really do like me, and they like it when I visit. Just been awhile since I've had one on my lap.

	07-02-2005 09:49									#21
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quote: I have three little brothers, I'm 20, they're now 17, 12 and 7 so fairly used to small kids running around. Personal space simply doesn't happen. It's an alien concept, like oestrogen.

That's why it felt so odd to be hesitant. I have two little brothers, and I never had any 'personal space' until I moved away from home to go to university.

	07-02-2005 09:51									#22
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quote: I say go ahead and just do it Ben. Little kids are soft and fuzzy and warm. Getting used to dandling them on your knees will develop your nurturing side

Yeah, that's something I need to work on. I don't think I'm all that approachable sometimes.

	07-02-2005 09:54									#23
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quote: When the bug you it's ok to tell them to go play or something. If their parents are there they should do that.

True, it wasn't that I felt they were bothering me, just encroaching, which was quite odd for me. Never felt that way around kids before.

	07-02-2005 09:55									#24
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I dealt with 5 year olds over the summer, and after a while you get used to it. They like sitting in peoples laps.