23-02-2005 03:27									#1
	Alexander's Horse!!! Skanky!! Ockers!!! Suffering from ads?

Go on!! Rub it in!!!



Will our shame never end?

quote: Hayden ton sets up Australia win Second one-day international, Christchurch Australia 314-6 (50 overs) beat New Zealand 208 (40.4 overs) by 106 runs Opener Matthew Hayden struck 114 before injuring his shoulder in Christchurch as Australia went 2-0 up in the one-day series against New Zealand. Ricky Ponting (53) and Damien Martyn (58) provided the support for Hayden as the Aussies totalled a huge 314-6. The Kiwis slumped to 73-6, with Adam Gilchrist taking five catches, before succumbing for 208 in the 41st over despite Daniel Vettori's rapid 83. Hayden hurt himself while catching Chris Cairns and will be monitored. He had earlier celebrated a wonderful return to top form, hitting two sixes and 12 fours, but suffered a grade one strain to his right AC-Joint and is in doubt for the third match of the series. New Zealand must now win all three remaining matches - starting at Auckland on Saturday - to take the series, but such a turn-round looked a remote possibility at Jade Stadium. Skipper Stephen Fleming chose to put Australia in after winning the toss, with former rugby star Jeff Wilson included in the New Zealand team for his first one-day international since March 1993. He was taught a harsh lesson as his six overs cost 57 runs, with only left-arm spinner Vettori (0-31 from 10) able to exercise any measure of control over the Australian batsmen. Gilchrist was caught behind off Daryl Tuffey from the second ball of the match but Hayden and Ponting set about putting things right with a stand of 99 for the second wicket. Ponting cleared the ropes twice as he raced to 50 off 51 balls, but only added three more before he was run out by Hamish Marshall. By then, Hayden was into his stride and he and Martyn added 133, although it took them 24 overs. Martyn was run out off the final ball of the 41st over, but the final nine cost the Kiwis 82 runs as Australia raised the tempo. Hayden's century came up off 110 balls but he eventually fell to a catch by Wilson off Kyle Mills, leaving Michael Clarke to add 23 off 13 balls and Mike Hussey 32 not out off 20 as the total mounted past 300. The new ball pairing of Brett Lee and Glenn McGrath made short work of New Zealand's top order, claiming two wickets each - all of them catches behind the wicket by Gilchrist. He claimed another when Andrew Symonds found the edge of Craig McMillan's bat and when Cairns followed for 22, the home side were in danger of being embarrassed. Vettori and Brendon McCullum (20) halted their decline by sharing a stand of 62 before McCullum gave a return catch to Symonds, who finished with 3-41. Wilson made 22 in an eighth wicket stand of 62 but the end came quickly once he was caught by Ponting off Jason Gillespie. Having passed fifty for the first time in a limited overs international, Vettori was denied a century when he was caught at deep square leg off Gillespie after hitting 10 fours in his 77-ball knock. Mills was last to go, run out by Clarke, after setting off for a quick single and being sent back by Tuffey. New Zealand: S P Fleming, N J Astle, M S Sinclair, J Wilson, C D McMillan, H J H Marshall, C L Cairns, B B McCullum, K D Mills, D L Vettori, D R Tuffey Australia: M L Hayden, A C Gilchrist, R T Ponting, D R Martyn, A Symonds, M J Clarke, M E K Hussey, G B Hogg, B Lee, J Gillespie, G D McGrath Story from BBC SPORT:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/sp...ket/4283135.stm

	23-02-2005 04:05									#2
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Any game where you can feasibly get beat by 106 of anything is retarded.

	23-02-2005 04:06									#3
	Re: Alexander's Horse!!! Skanky!! Ockers!!! Suffering from ads?

quote: Originally posted by Agathon Go on!! Rub it in!!! Will our shame never end?

If you're lucky New Zealand will have a One Day series with England soon. That'll cheer you up.

	23-02-2005 04:06									#4
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quote: Any game where you can feasibly get beat by 106 of anything is retarded.

Sounds like me and golf.

	23-02-2005 15:06									#5
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov Any game where you can feasibly get beat by 106 of anything is retarded.

So that's why we don't see you beer bellied, comb-overed, cigarette bedecked and pint of ale handed, playing darts.

	23-02-2005 17:22									#6
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Or taking part in the decathlon for that matter.

	23-02-2005 19:42									#7
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New Zealand were whitewashed by England over here last year - just like the Aussies will be in the ashes.

	23-02-2005 22:18									#8
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anyone wanna explain the rules?

	23-02-2005 23:41									#9
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I don't even know what game it is, but it's obvious that New Zealand is very bad at it.

	24-02-2005 00:29									#10
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quote: Originally posted by Lawrence of Arabia anyone wanna explain the rules?

Simple version.

You have a field, with a 22 yard pitch in the middle with a wicket at either end. You have two teams of 11. At any one time you have a team bowling/fielding, and 2 batsmen from the other team - one at each end of the pitch, on the field of play.

Bowling side attempts to get wickets: By either bowling over a batsman's wicket, catching him, or hitting a wicket whilst he is attempting to run between the wickets. There are other ways of being out, but they are simple ways.

Batsmen attempt to score as many runs (a run being the act of both batsmen running, from their respective ends, the 22 yards between the wicket creases) before being out. Hit the ball, and if you can complete x runs before the fielders can get the ball to hit your wicket you get x runs. Boundaries count 6 (no bounce) or 4 (at least one bounce).

	24-02-2005 00:33									#11
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you forgot the googly.

	24-02-2005 00:34									#12
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He can use google for that.

	24-02-2005 03:39									#13
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I've always found it amusing that explanations of cricket inevitably create more confusion than they solve. The whole parliance, both in discussion and explanation of the game, sounds like very broken, halted English.

	24-02-2005 03:44									#14
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I'm disappointed in AH. He of all people loves gloating.

	24-02-2005 05:20									#15
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Well, when you're facing a run rate of over 6 right from the get go there's always a very good chance of missing the target by a large margin.
Many teams fall a long way short in similar situations.

quote: Originally posted by some English Plonker! New Zealand were whitewashed by England over here last year

I'll be sure to remember this in a few months at the conclusion of a British tour of NZ in another sport ...

	24-02-2005 06:58									#16
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov Any game where you can feasibly get beat by 106 of anything is retarded.

Precocious ejaculation, measured in seconds.

	24-02-2005 07:38									#17
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Isn't this the sport with official breaks for afternoon tea in it?

	24-02-2005 08:19									#18
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov Any game where you can feasibly get beat by 106 of anything is retarded.

Com'on, you can lose big on points in contract bridge.

	24-02-2005 08:39									#19
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

The only sports worth watching are ones that feature shapely females in skimpy attire.

I'm convinced that subconscious homosexual cravings is the true motivation for watching sweaty men run about on an oval.

	24-02-2005 08:51									#20
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quote: I'm convinced that subconscious homosexual cravings is the true motivation for watching sweaty men run about on an oval.

I've long believed that.

	24-02-2005 18:59									#21
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quote: Originally posted by Agathon quote: I'm convinced that subconscious homosexual cravings is the true motivation for watching sweaty men run about on an oval. I've long believed that.

If you fancy cricketers you're desperately in need of getting laid by ANYTHING.

	24-02-2005 19:51									#22
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Hey Ravagon you know that one will be a whitewash for the British Isles as well.

	25-02-2005 02:06									#23
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quote: Originally posted by molly bloom quote: I'm convinced that subconscious homosexual cravings is the true motivation for watching sweaty men run about on an oval. If you fancy cricketers you're desperately in need of getting laid by ANYTHING.

The aforementioned sport sounds more like Aussie rules than cricket. I've never known a cricketer to get sweaty and they never really run if they can help it

Cricket is about spending 5 days in the sun drinking beer and claiming to be playing a sport.