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Brundlefly is offline Brundlefly
Prince
United States
Nov 2001
time: 00:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 20:25
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Vonnegut's Advice Support Apolyton, buy GURPS/ Alpha Centauri

The commencement address at MIT Kurt Vonnegut didn't give...

The speech below, attributed in newsgroups and e-mails as being authored by Kurt Vonnegut, was actually penned by Mary Schmich of the Chicago Tribune. You can read more about it on Wired but nonetheless... it is a very cool speech. And here it is:



quote:

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Japher is offline Japher
Prince
Ook! Ook! Ack! Ack! Ack!
Jun 2002
time: 05:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 20:29
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Inflate your Upload Space

That speech comes up every year about this time

good speech though

alva is offline alva
Emperor
Republic of Flanders
Sep 2001
time: 06:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 20:30
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Suffering from ads?

Mercator is offline Mercator
King
Sorekara no Nanimo
Jan 1970
time: 06:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 20:36 Visit Mercator's homepage!
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Got spare money?

Ah, so Baz Luhrmann didn't write it I see...

Immortal Wombat is offline Immortal Wombat
Prince
in perpetuity
Dec 2000
time: 05:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 20:57 Visit Immortal Wombat's homepage!
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Tired of ads?

He just set it to music.

Agathon is offline Agathon
Prince
Leafs 4TW!! - CPA
Dec 2002
time: 00:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 22:18
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Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

That is the lamest speech ever given. Ted Striker should give commencement speeches.

Japher is offline Japher
Prince
Ook! Ook! Ack! Ack! Ack!
Jun 2002
time: 05:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 22:19
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Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

or Pekka

JohnT is offline JohnT

Emperor
Capitalist
Mar 1999
time: 00:19
  Old Post 04-05-2005 22:51
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Put an end to popups!

I'd pay to see a Pekka commencement speech.

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