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Rhothaerill is offline Rhothaerill

Emperor
Vincent Returns!!!
Feb 2003
time: 21:33
  Old Post 14-06-2005 02:49
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Tales from the Front

By First Bard Rhothaerill
As presented to RhothSPIN Press


November 15, 1475bc

The mountains close around us and I begin to wonder at our resolve. We sit here day after day, facing the famed immortals of Desolation Row. Rocks pound into us by the hour, thrown across the chasm before us by the catapults wheeled up the treacherous mountain paths. We’ve been lucky as only a few of our men have been hit. But still we bide our time, as directed by the generals.

And all I can think of is the past…

It has been many seasons since our humanitarian effort began. For many thousands of years the poor people of Desolation Row have suffered from the lack of music in their lives. The music of Euphorica is a joy to behold, and has been freely distributed to all who ask for millennia. Daily our bards create new songs and new poetry to share with the world.

But it has not been shared with the wretched masses of Desolation Row. They silently call out to our very souls, entreating us to share our beloved music. Alas we cannot. The oppressive regime of the infamous first dictator Aqualung71 has pervaded the leadership of Desolation Row for all time.

They fear us, do the dictators. They fear what the joys of music will bring to their people. They fear that those same people will come to realize how wretched their lives truly are under the regime of Aqualung71’s descendants. They fear they will lose control of their land and their power and their gold. And those dictators are correct for once music enters the hearts and minds of the people, once it pervades into their very souls, the people will realize the sham perpetrated on them by their leaders. They will realize all that life has to offer for them and cast off the oppressive regime of the dictators for a more enlightened government.

Recognizing the threat that the music of Euphorica presented, the dictators of Desolation Row quickly began their plans to crush any chance of their people hearing the enlightenment music had to offer. Those dictators created the Immortals, fearsome warriors singlemindedly dedicated to stamping out all forms of joy and entertainment in their land.

We, the Bards of Euphorica could no longer sit back and peacefully attempt to give our gift of music and joy to the people of Desolation Row. It is almost a legend by now, one that my father passed on that story to me as his father passed on to him and so on up the line of the Bards of the Rhothaerill line. My great, great, great grandfather was there that fateful day all those decades ago when First Bard McMeadows, leader of Euphorica in the name of Bjorn Tzu, declared that our nation would actively enforce our dedication to the spread of music and joy into the lands of Desolation Row. First Bard McMeadows, perhaps our most respected and admired leader since Bjorn Tzu who led us to settle near the plains of AbbA and gave us the joy of music, with a tear in his eye spoke these lines, “My friends, we know not what the future will hold, but we do know this. The men and women of Desolation Row are barren inside. Their plight cries out to us with their need of music and poetry and joy. Through the efforts of their foul dictators they know not the beauty of music. Though these people do not know us, perhaps they do not even know how much they need our music, but we MUST help these people. We must give them joy in their lives again. The memory of our great founder Bjorn Tzu demands no less than action. We must cast off the passive attempts to bring music to these people that have gone in the past. We must defeat the corrupt military of their oppressive dictators, including the evil Immortal forces they have bred. Only then will our mission to bring joy and love be successful.”

Alas, not all went as planned.

A first-strike force, intended to disable the dictator’s supply of weapons for their accursed immortals, met their untimely demise at the hands of the horsemen of Desolation Row, becoming trapped between the opponents and the hills of Antioch behind them. It was a slaughter. The best and brightest voices of Euphorica, suddenly silenced. Many spoke of the capriciousness of the great god of luck, RNG; that perhaps he did not favor our effort. But First Bard McMeadows was undeterred. Perhaps our attempt at ending the war quickly by eliminating the supplies of the weapons for immortals ended in disaster. But we would return someday, with better trained and better equipped men and women, to continue the fight for the freedom and joy of the people of Desolation Row.

Since that day many centuries have passed. The descendants of those dictators of Desolation Row occasionally sent their forces to engage our own, perhaps to test our resolve, perhaps just because they are evil and do not care if their own forces are lost. All were turned away, defeated.

And then one day my own grandfather, First Bard at the time, declared that the waiting would be over. The great Euphoriscian Musical Invasion would once again continue as conceived all those years ago by First Bard McMeadows.

And here I am today. Our forces have made their way through the Musical Mountains between our two lands to this point across from the arrayed forces of Desolation Row. Will they attack us? We know not. Will we attack them? It remains to be seen. For soon I will step down as First Bard. My family has held the title of First Bard for three generations this time. But I am old and my children are young, too young to become First Bard. The title will pass to one of the other great families, perhaps a descendant of the royal McMeadows line once again. Perhaps he will replace the current generals of our Musical Invasion. I know not, only that my time is nigh approaching.

For soon I go to face that final frontier known only as Andy.

Krill is offline Krill
Emperor
On a cold wet rock, in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.
Dec 2003
time: 05:33
  Old Post 14-06-2005 02:50
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Those aren't rocks, they're Banana skins...

...and don't get food poisoning

skrobism is offline skrobism
King
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Oct 2000
time: 23:33
  Old Post 14-06-2005 19:07
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Wonderful tale!

..."final frontier known only as Andy." lol

Rhothaerill is offline Rhothaerill

Emperor
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Feb 2003
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  Old Post 14-06-2005 21:07
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quote:
Originally posted by skrobism
Wonderful tale!

..."final frontier known only as Andy." lol

Thanks.

It means something. That's the name of my son that's about to be born this week or next.

skrobism is offline skrobism
King
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Oct 2000
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  Old Post 15-06-2005 00:10
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I figured it was an inside joke r/t your team. That is why I laughed. I like it when stories are embellished that way.

Final frontier - hah it's only the beginning.

Good luck with Andy and keep us posted.

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 15-06-2005 06:11
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A brave but forlorn attempt to explain away the complete and utter failure of the Euphorican military expedition which traipsed 16 heavily armed units across the mountains to capture Invictus.

For all other teams out there.....the Euphorican Empire must surely be only lightly defended


Oh by the way Rhoth, great story though You should post it in the stories forum and enter it in the latest vote.

snoopy369 is offline snoopy369

Emperor
Of the Peanuts Gallery
Apr 2004
time: 23:33
  Old Post 15-06-2005 07:02
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quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
A brave but forlorn attempt to explain away the complete and utter failure of the Euphorican military expedition which traipsed 16 heavily armed units across the mountains to capture Invictus.

For all other teams out there.....the Euphorican Empire must surely be only lightly defended


Then perhaps you should consider making such a reconnaisance yourself ... I have a feeling you would be surprised.

Ljube is offline Ljube
Emperor
Belgrade
May 2003
time: 06:33
  Old Post 15-06-2005 07:28
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quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
A brave but forlorn attempt to explain away the complete and utter failure of the Euphorican military expedition which traipsed 16 heavily armed units across the mountains to capture Invictus.



Invictus is truly an impenetrable fortress if it can withstand such ferocious attacks. I bet walls are constructed around the city.


quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
For all other teams out there.....the Euphorican Empire must surely be only lightly defended



If this message is addressed to the Horde, we usually spare those cities that offer no resistance to our superior armies.

ormuzd is offline ormuzd
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Jan 2003
time: 07:33
  Old Post 15-06-2005 09:46 Visit ormuzd's homepage!
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quote:
If this message is addressed to the Horde, we usually spare those cities that offer no resistance to our superior armies.


Do you? I didn't know

Rhothaerill is offline Rhothaerill

Emperor
Vincent Returns!!!
Feb 2003
time: 21:33
  Old Post 15-06-2005 21:36
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quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
Oh by the way Rhoth, great story though You should post it in the stories forum and enter it in the latest vote.


Thanks Aqua. I already did post it in the stories forum, but there hasn't been any activity over there since I posted it.

Paddy the Scot is offline Paddy the Scot

Prince
Hordeland
Mar 2001
time: 14:33
  Old Post 20-06-2005 03:27 Visit Paddy the Scot<br><a href=/members><img src=/forums/images/inmate-icon.gif border=0></a><BR>'s homepage!
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quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
A brave but forlorn attempt to explain away the complete and utter failure of the Euphorican military expedition which traipsed 16 heavily armed units across the mountains to capture Invictus.

For all other teams out there.....the Euphorican Empire must surely be only lightly defended


Oh by the way Rhoth, great story though You should post it in the stories forum and enter it in the latest vote.


so when will the great Desolators tell of the Grand Battles....

or are you all tucked up in bed, not allowed to go out and fight the big bad raging Bards

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 21-06-2005 11:41
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For those of you with any lingering doubts about the intentions of the Horde, here is a picture of one of their Battle Group Generals, Lord Bongo:

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McMeadows is offline McMeadows
King
right here, right now
Mar 1999
time: 06:33
  Old Post 21-06-2005 13:10 Visit McMeadows's homepage!
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he's harmless, the gun ain't loaded

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 21-06-2005 13:29
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quote:
Originally posted by McMeadows
he's harmless, the gun ain't loaded


Ah, that explains a lot

Paddy the Scot is offline Paddy the Scot

Prince
Hordeland
Mar 2001
time: 14:33
  Old Post 21-06-2005 14:35 Visit Paddy the Scot<br><a href=/members><img src=/forums/images/inmate-icon.gif border=0></a><BR>'s homepage!
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Yes, you continue to look that way old chap

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 22-06-2005 09:55
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It seems the gun is not loaded because you have run out of ammunition.

I will concede though where RL is concerned, we all know that General Bongo doesn't shoot blanks

McMeadows is offline McMeadows
King
right here, right now
Mar 1999
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  Old Post 22-06-2005 12:21 Visit McMeadows's homepage!
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quote:
Originally posted by Aqualung71
I will concede though where RL is concerned, we all know that General Bongo doesn't shoot blanks



More in the making, general?

Paddy the Scot is offline Paddy the Scot

Prince
Hordeland
Mar 2001
time: 14:33
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hahaha, way too much information

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 29-06-2005 07:05
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Tales From the Front?

There no longer is any "front".

I wonder if the departure of the great Rhoth family had anything to do with the demise of the Euphorican forces, and whether the new leader's carcass is now fouling the air at the foot of Mount Massacre where he was slaughtered like a fatted calf

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 22-07-2005 08:15
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Looks like the Euphorican front has moved considerably north

Perhaps the fateful Battle of Mt Massacre was your Stalingrad?

snoopy369 is offline snoopy369

Emperor
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Apr 2004
time: 23:33
  Old Post 22-07-2005 09:26
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More likely the fateful battle of Mt Massacre was our Pearl Harbor. Proving the treachery of the Horde, and damaging us admittedly, but not ending our war by any means.

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 22-07-2005 11:31
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quote:
Originally posted by snoopy369
but not ending our war by any means.


.....with more than 20 Horde units in your lands....you think?

Paddy the Scot is offline Paddy the Scot

Prince
Hordeland
Mar 2001
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  Old Post 22-07-2005 11:56 Visit Paddy the Scot<br><a href=/members><img src=/forums/images/inmate-icon.gif border=0></a><BR>'s homepage!
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quote:
Originally posted by snoopy369
More likely the fateful battle of Mt Massacre was our Pearl Harbor. Proving the treachery of the Horde, and damaging us admittedly, but not ending our war by any means.


oh do tell us Great Lord of the Bards, the tale of how you got taken in by the evil wolves of the Horde....

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PLATO is offline PLATO

King
Of the occupied South
Dec 2002
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  Old Post 23-07-2005 20:18
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quote:
Originally posted by snoopy369
More likely the fateful battle of Mt Massacre was our Pearl Harbor. Proving the treachery of the Horde, and damaging us admittedly, but not ending our war by any means.


Mt. Massacre proves our treachery?

That's your "evidence"?

Perhaps you would like to discuss the many, many times we asked, even pleaded, to have are military people co-ordinate with yours. We saw the outcome of this battle coming and even warned you repeatedly that your actions were ill concieved!

Your response was "we are experienced"

And now you seek to state that this was a sign of Horde treachery?

Unbelievable...simply unbelievable.

As to "not ending our war by any means"...the means of ending this war will be the Great armies of your enemies. You will soon reap what you have sown. That much is clear. Even now, we stand on your conquered territory. Soon...soon, dear bards. Honour and Justice will be brought to your former lands.

snoopy369 is offline snoopy369

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Apr 2004
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  Old Post 25-07-2005 07:57
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Plato - even Aqualung and his friends of the DR would agree that they got a bit lucky in Mount Massacre. They hit about the 60th percentile in luck, which is a lot to expect of such a large battle ... and nonetheless were nearly destroyed, being reduced to a point that had you attacked as you had promised, rather than betraying us, DR would have lost their last hope - Antioch.

We are very experienced, and understand that war means sometimes you have to lose some to gain something more. Too bad your military leaders didn't understand that much ...

And if you mean 'reap what we sow' as in 'take all the heat for the alliance so the BOH hasn't lost a single meaningful unit to the DR and then can suddenly attack us' ... sure.

Aqualung71 is offline Aqualung71
Emperor
Lord Desolator of the Desolation Row, C3CDG
Oct 2002
time: 12:33
  Old Post 25-07-2005 08:32
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quote:
Originally posted by snoopy369
... and nonetheless were nearly destroyed, being reduced to a point that had you attacked as you had promised, rather than betraying us, DR would have lost their last hope - Antioch.


This is where you are mistaken snoop.....quite apart from other considerations and whether BOH should or should not have attacked, the fact is that the result of such an attack was far from certain given our defensive capabilities at the time. BOH knows this all too well and clearly were not prepared to take the risk of losing most or all of their stack.

I leave it to you and the BOH to argue about what were the ramifications of that decision.

Paddy the Scot is offline Paddy the Scot

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