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BlackCat
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quote: Originally posted by Pekka
I feel this is typical for polyton.. no one gives a crap that Turkey has had series of bombings now (well at least 2), no threads.
Bush farts in private, 10 threads.
Counter: People die every day. We can't get depressed about it and dwell on it newbie!1 Now gimme news, like Britney hitting it with backup dancer! WHAT? She's NOT virgin? That's breaking news to me and of great interest. |
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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please resist. I'm sorry, go make the thread about Turkey. If you have the time, get back into the real world and understand the word hypocricy and what it means, and that your trolling is not appreciated in this thread. If you don't take a hint, please God make it as painful as possible. If you don't give a crap about my christmas story then be polite and stfu, but like real *******s, I find it hard to believe you actually are able to do that. Surprise me?
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The once a year get together is always made more difficult than any other event. It includes your dysfunctional family which members don't want to associate with each other, and yet they somehow feel obligated to come and show up every single Christmas. It's a tradition, a tradition of pain. But I guess it fits the theme.
Younger cousins have already mastered in avoiding the event. Some of them are with their girl/boyfriends for the dinner, surprisingly enough they always choose the 'other family' to visit for the tradition. I wonder why ours isn't the big hit. So few of the cousins are on and off visitors. Singles come. Divorcees come. What a lovely bunch. Singles come just to remind themselves why they don't want to get married in the first place. Seeing the bitter divorcees year after year is a gift worth more than gold.
Divorcees come because otherwise they wouldn't have anyone to enjoy the dinner with. This however, is the whole family in its full numbers.
The only reason I even bother to come is not to get excited from all the uncomfortable situations, discussions and to witness the destruction of the family, but to obey my grandads wishes, because it is the only time he gets to see us all, and he is getting older every year. I don't know if we are all pretending for the same reason. I wonder when it's his time to go if we ever get together again.
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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Sloww, d on't worry I'm used to it already and look the positive on it .. it's not like I'm depressed about this all.. I'm not depressed to begin with. I'm hoping to catch few others with the same traidition of pain to give them few laughs when they recognize things .
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I'm personally not very good with umcomfortable situations. When there's an event that is guaranteed to give me uncomfort, I'm thinking every situation into the pool of excuses how to get out. Every year I think of an excuse that would be legit to not go. I'd rather spent the Christmas alone, without the dinner and food, staring the wall. I've done it before. It was more fun. But I would never forgive myself if grandpa wouldn't get to have one more dinner with the whole family if I skipped the last one. I guess I'm trapped.
He is about the only sane adult in the room. I wonder if he senses the destruction. I think he knows.. maybe he pretends too. But at least he is genuinely happy to see everyone. Unlike the rest of us. Aside my grandpa, one of my cousins is my rock. He always shows up and he's a good friend of mine and we keep in touch, go out, hang out and so on. He is the bravest one in the room, because he talks to everyone, starts small talk, is polite and doesn't talk behind anyones back. Until we get alone outside, sneaking for a smoke.
I dont' even know why we sneak for a smoke, it's not like they don't know we smoke. We don't hide the smell of smoking when we get back. Maybe it's the same reason we still come to the event. It's impolite not to. It's impolite to smoke. We are polite people.
I know the real reason though. It's because no one wants to open the box of deep trauma. It would end up ugly. Maybe even in fight. It's only few hours more.. no scenes, it's only once a year.. just act polite damn it! No one dares to drink alcohol. It would get ugly sooner than later.
But for the same reason I think my cousin is the bravest, I also hate him for it, because it makes me look more like a bastard. Then again, I'm not the only one.
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BlackCat
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quote: Originally posted by Pekka
please resist. I'm sorry, go make the thread about Turkey. If you have the time, get back into the real world and understand the word hypocricy and what it means, and that your trolling is not appreciated in this thread. If you don't take a hint, please God make it as painful as possible. If you don't give a crap about my christmas story then be polite and stfu, but like real *******s, I find it hard to believe you actually are able to do that. Surprise me?
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Sorry, I think that you would be more surprised if I didn't answer, so since I don't wan't to upset you, I'd better do it.
Why should I make those threads ? It's not me that got upset in the Maria Carey thread, but as I can see, you need your two thread-a-day for more important things 
I certainly give a crap for your christmas story (please don't take this litterally), but since it's in the high twenties here and there are more than six months to christmas, I have problems taking it seriously.
Oh, and since god doesn't exist, I'm not that worried 
Edit : A minor clarification 
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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blackcat, ok good for you.
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It's time to introduce the rest of the family. First is my first aunt. The hostess, the hostile. Everyone knows not to piss her off. She's the one who think she has the right to rain on everyone without any reason, to give her a reason for it is like giving a knife to a serial killer and unlock the prison doors. She might be legally insane. Surpressed anger, bitterness, hidden inside of the mountain that is her. She's the type that is angry at you for a month if you give her a small reason. She will let you know about it too. I wonder how all the anger got surpressed and hidden, because she's very vocal about it. I guess there's something much worse deeper inside that we don't know about. I honestly think she is capable of killing a man, both physically and mentally. I truly do. She reminds me of Annie Wilkes in Stephen King's Misery. It could be about her. I only wish I was exaggarating. I feel she would be capable of destroying the whole family, even if the rest of us were a tight bunch. We are all kind of afraid of her.
No wonder her daughter, the same age as me, came to ask drugs from me one year, while we were sneaking out for a smoke with my #1 cousin. She finally figured out we sneak out for a smoke, and came too. We didn't know she smoked. We were less than 18. The first thing she said to me was if I had any hashis to sell her. Hopefully the stronger ones and not some sissy paki. I was shocked. Not because of the fact that she obviously smoked hashis, but because she asked me so bluntly. And thought I really had some. And with me right then!
I had to decline and say I really don't smoke, sorry. She didn't believe me. Her mother, the hostess, had openly told everyone in their family, that I am a drug user/dealer, since my mom found out I had tried pot. So that makes me an addict of every drug and maybe even a dealer. So she thought I was in denial and trying to protect myself from saying that I do not carry any drugs with me at the moment. "I know you have some, don't lie to me", she kept on insisting.
Another shocker was the amount of information she had. But before the ciggie was out, I got over it. So what, she smokes some. It's not a surprise. Getting hit with the hostility mountain every day of her life. But she didn't seem to be one of those types that wants to smoke to get high and have fun, or think, listen music, eat, do something, or just hang around. She reminded me of the desperate type, who will move into trouble later on, and harder drugs. Oh well.
But none of us dared to criticize the event itself. No.. we'd rather talk about getting drugs to the underaged cousin, and me beign a dealer, even when we speak once a year, at best.
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oh and people, don't take it so seriously even if this is true. I find it amusing and laugh about it sometimes 
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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Other attendants include my #1 cousin who always shows up, my other aunt who is mellow and nice, not really a problem. Then there is the weird case, some woman. Who is friends with the hostess. If the Aileen Wuornos, hostess, was a serious basket case and hostility bomb not afraid to make a scene and justify everything with just because, her friend does not differ at all. Except that she isn't even polite in the events. She is genuinely openly hostile. She says openly bad and rude thigns about everyone and she hates everyone of us except the hostess. Yet she invites her every single year, because she is lonely. I wonder why that is?
They are the super team that gives me the scares. She always gets her own corner and chair, and talks to the hostess, and then barks at the rest of us. We always bring her presents, because well.. she's been there every year. She's not even family but we still consider polite to exchange at least cards. Except she has no cards for none of us. Or verbal greetings. I figure if we ever got into a fight, I would not be afraid to strike a women and not stop until there's nothing but a bloody pulp left. Just for self defense. She is the poison, the image of misery and hostility. The hostess doesn't care, it's OK to make us all feel miserable. I think that would make her a bad hostess, but then again she does the same, so I guess he doesn't notice or thinks we all deserve it. Maybe we had it coming all these years.. who knows.. maybe God has a sense of humour.
She has, for example, openly said to everyone outloud in disgust how disgusting young man I was, and how rude I was and how badly I treated my mother when I made a joke about her. But it was an innocent joke, with not one percentage of disrespect. I guess that was me then and she was right to point it out. That was just 30 seconds of one event from her. We've had many, every year, for hours.
Did I mention everyone is divorcee or single? Everyone's husbands attend the event too, even when they are divorced, just to keep the tradition up. None of them are comfortable. I wonder if they suffer the most. Or do they enjoy the free food so much they come every year?
The best is the husband of the hostess. He left her for a hooker in Thailand. At first I was kind of disappointed at his decision, but now I'm beginning to understand. I even think he is starting to be my champion to still come every christmas. Rubbing it in. one of the best rivalries and one on one politness fights is definitely between the hostess and her ex-husband. I don't know what the definiton of sadism is, but this should be it.
I'm just waiting and praying for the moment one of them gets fed up and starts shouting, and then they kill each other, adn the rest of us just wipe our mouths, get up, leave the table and go home.
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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So back to the second round, the worst round. This is the round where you take more food, not too little, not too much. It's a true skill to know how to do it, don't take first, don't take last. You are supposed to eat slowly and talk. Time for discussion. Time to find out what people did last the whole year. Not to my surprise, no one did anything, except myself and my cousin. Maybe we are the only people not bitter and self destructive? It's ironic to find a bunch where all the IT people are almost happy and everyone else is miserable and stressed out.
I already know what they are going to ask me. Where's the nice girl I brought some years ago. I'm kind of tired to tell them it didn't work out and I don't care if she's dead or alive. And no at the moment I'm not seeing anyone and the reason is obviously that I'm gay. Thanks for making that thought pattern every year. Must be. I'm taking it as a compliment anyway, seeing how they are doing with their lives and relationships. Even if I had a girlfriend at the time of the event, would I hate her so much that I would make her come there? or would she love me so much she wanted to support me and share the torture? Or would that be my excuse to go to someone elses family?! I need to get a girlfriend, before Christmas.
Of course now it's worse for me. Now that my dad doesn't want to come anymore and doesn't, because my mom doesn't attend the event either,being in another country, I am the only representor of our family. So I kind of HAVE to come. Discussion always goes to 'so where's your dad?' 'how is your mom doing?'. Like I want to talk with them about it. But thanks for reminding me that my dad is spending the Christmas alone until I return and join him. No thanks, don't suggest me getting any food for him back, after all there's only tons of it to throw to trash bin. Nah.. I rather bring him half of a pizza that is cold by the time I get back. That's OK though, we are good at pretending it's not Christmas. At least it works better than pretendign we all enjoy being in here.
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MosesPresley
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Do they take pretend leaks in Turkey?
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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PH, yeah.. weird isn't it? anyway folks do not get depressed or go 'oh that's sad'. It's dark humour. While it's true, it's kind of funny. I'm not sad about it.
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But for the most parts, I don't feel any pity for these people. I do like my grandpa, my #1 and his mother, my other aunt. I get along with them just fine and I don't mind seeing them more than once a year. We even call each other and send letters, e-mail, and hang out. So the contrast is huge to the hostility blob that I call the rest of my family. Depressed, sad bunch of people.
The husband of my aunt that I get along with however is kind of sad. Not hostile, just genuinely sad. They got divorce because well.. my aunt I guess didn't feel they connected anymore. Because marriage is supposed to be hot and sexy after 30 years. He had to move to a remote location with no neighbours close, spend all the money he had on this house that was shitty as hell. It was so bad, that it actually broke. Yeah. The house got broken. He had a dog, but it died. It was his only friend I guess, and it happened the same timet he house broke and I think his sister also died. Summer of.. something I guess. My aunt had the grace to go and see him, because they are still 'friends'. 'So you are still suicidial, sad and lonely man?', basically the answer is yes. So what do we do about it? Decades of service in the family? **** it.. he can join the christmas dinner! More torture or not? Reminding that there are still people who have some connections to real life, even if it's just hatred and bigotry. Better that than nothing I guess?
I truly feel sorry for him.. I guess my aunt feels it too, genuinely.
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Pekka
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em seu burro dos pais!
Feb 2002 time: 07:37
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I wonder if the family dysfunctions contribute one reason to the fact that none of us youngsters in the family have had a long relationship. We are kind of unable to maintain them, and for the most part we are not even interested in one. Lead by example.
So now that I have introduced the merry group, back to the actual event. So I got off from the pretend-leak, pissed off that I was busted and had to return so early. Second round started and I was already thought as a gay man. Nothing had changed in any respect. What a surprise.
I started a discussion by genuinely admiring the table. The discussion what shut down faster than it started, it was brought there from.. Thailand. Ok.. I guess I better shut up from here on out. Naturally it was my fault, ruining the atmosphere. Then again in my opinion it was ruined when we all got together in the first place, so it's not like the damage was something beyond human understanding.
I knew there was still christmas song singing and desert coming up, and chatting after all that. Still more than 80% to go of the event I calculated scientifically. My blood pressure is already up, but I figured I would go numb from embarrasment, uncomfortable feelings before 50%. Or at least I hoped so.
Usually I like to talk about myself and what's been up for the last year, but at this event, I really do not. I try to downplay what I have achieved in a year, because everyone would get pissed off and more angry, knowing they have accomplished nothing except get more angry and tired. So I said the school is just OK and I don't have any plans and that I'm not so interested about the field anymore, even though that's not true. In here, people associate IT field with money, Uni degree with money, combine both adn they will loathe you if they are the type of people who accomplish nothing and instead are jealous.
So I usually just shut up. As does my #1 cousin, who actually is succesful already.
I quickly see two things that makes me feel the storm is on the way. First off, the ex-husband of the hostess had a drink, strong booze, and one of the on and off cousins came to pop by with her new boyfriend. He doesn't have a clue what he just did, stepping into the Lions Den. This is going to be beautiful I thought. Finally, we would all have someone to target, and pour the anger towards him, the innocent young dude who never did anything to us. Ha-ha! This will be sweet!!!
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