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bassman
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near Seattle
Dec 2001
time: 21:17
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The babble of hundreds of conversations that had filled the Hall of Congress only moments earlier, dropped to a hush as the Zululand President strode into the Hall, immediately followed by a crash of applause. The vividly colored ceremonial robes added grandeur to an already imposing man of two meters of height, only partially obscuring his athletic build. He walked steadily to the podium, acknowledging the approval, but forgoing his normal practice of pausing to greet supporters. While Presidential addresses to the combined Congress were routine, the allowance of vast members of the media was unprecedented. The address was to be simulcast over radio, television, and the Internet. The entire nation would be watching; indeed, many of Zululand's allies and foes would also be watching.
Shaka reached the podium, and raised his hands to quiet the applause, then gripped the podium and began.
"Members of Congress, scientists, journalists, distinguished guests, citizens of Zululand."
"I'm honored to be addressing you tonight, both here in person and throughout this great nation. We meet in an hour of change and challenge, in a decade of hope and fear, in an age of both knowledge and ignorance. The greater our knowledge increases, the greater our ignorance unfolds."
"Many of you are concerned that, earlier this year, England was able to land a company of modern armor at Intombe. Although that attack force was quickly blasted into oblivion, you worry that further invasions are coming. Until now, the English seem to have limited themselves to shelling sections of coastland from the safety of their ships."
"I can reveal to you tonight what has previously been classified as military top secret. There have been six previous attempts by the English to land invasion troops, but through the swift and able actions of our Coastal Guard, those landing craft were either damaged and forced to turn back, or were sunk, killing all aboard. I ask you to join me in publicly applauding our men and women in the armed services who have so ably safeguarded our country, especially those lost during the battles."
"It was only through a combination of intrigue and guile that the English armor managed to achieve this recent landing. The combined Armed Forces have reviewed their policies on patrolling the nation's borders and THIS - WILL - NOT - HAPPEN - AGAIN!"
"I'll return to the question of England in a moment, but before making my second announcement, I should like to apologize to the esteemed ladies and gentlemen of the press. In previous press conferences, I was sometimes unable to confirm or deny some of your speculations due to the highly classified nature of our latest project. I evaded your questions knowing that it would not serve the good of the country to allow our foes to have knowledge of our most advanced technology."
"We are a mongrel nation, made powerful in our diversity. Whether we trace our ancestral origins to the first Zulu settlers or to the incorporated civilizations of Persia, Russia, China, or Aztland, we are one united people. Regardless of race, creed or color, we can point with pride to our national pre-eminence in scientific research, in military power, and in enlightened programs benefiting all citizens. The completion of the Longevity Project and the discovery of the cure for cancer are but the two most recent of these benefits."
"However, I come here tonight, not to examine the past, but to envision the future. For some time, there has been a great amount of discussion over what the great Zulu nation will attempt next, discussed not only within these halls, but also in the media and in meeting halls across Zululand. Tonight, our future will be revealed."
"We choose to go to the stars. We choose to go to the stars in this decade, not because it is easy, but because it is hard, because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win."
"It is for these reasons that I regard the decision ten years ago to shift our efforts in space from low to high gear as among the most important decisions made during my incumbency in the Office of the Presidency."
"Within these last two years, at least 145 satellites have circled the earth. Some 127 of them were "made in Zululand" and they were far more sophisticated and supplied far more knowledge to the people of the world than those of the English Empire."
"To be sure, all this costs us all a good deal of money. This year's space budget is thirteen times what it was in the beginning of my first term of office, and it is greater than the space budget of the previous eight years combined. That budget is now a staggering sum, many times greater than the combined cost of the Longevity Project and the research budget required to cure cancer. Space expenditures have been a high priority in my administration, for we have given this program the highest national priority even though I realize that this is in some measure an act of faith and vision, for we do not now know what benefits await us. But if I were to say, my fellow citizens, that we shall send into space, ten light years away from the control station in Mpumalanga, a giant rocket more than 800 feet tall, made of new metal alloys, some of which have not yet been invented, capable of standing heat and stresses several times more than have ever been experienced, fitted together with a precision better than the finest watch, carrying all the equipment needed for propulsion, guidance, control, communications, food and survival, on an untried mission, to an unknown celestial body, and then establish a new community on that planet, capable of self-sufficiency -and do all this, and do it right, and do it first before this year is out, then we must be bold."
"However, we are going to do it, and we have paid what needed to be paid. But it will be done. And it will be done before the end of this year."
"Many years ago the great Zulu explorer Z'org Mallori, who was to die on Mount Everest, was asked why did he want to climb it. He said, "Because it is there."
"Well, space is there, and we're going to climb it, and the moon and the planets are there, and the planetary system of Alpha Centauri is there, and new hopes for knowledge and peace are there. And, therefore, as we set sail we ask God's blessing on the most hazardous and dangerous and greatest adventure on which man has ever embarked."
"That is our future, but we have also need to address the problems of the present."
"Like most of you, I'm increasingly weary over the running war being waged by the mad Queen of England. She signs peace treaties only to break them a few years later. We have been generous in our trading only to have our trade ships attacked, our coasts shelled, our destroyers sunk by malicious submarines, and our sea lanes constricted."
"International infamy does not curtail the English aggressor, nor appeasement, nor trade, nor alliances, nor threat of mass destruction. As you no doubt remember, I ordered built an Intercontinental Ballistic Missile, tipped with a nuclear warhead, with the hope that knowledge of it's existence would at last deter mad Elizabeth from her path of national self-destruction. While she knows it exists, and her spies have confirmed it's deadly power, she persists in believing us incapable of action, and as she believes, so believes England."
"Therefore, I have ordered that, as of 7:25 this evening, London feel the righteous wrath of the Zulu people. The missile was launched about the time I began addressing you and should detonate in the next few minutes."
"May God have mercy on their souls."
Much of this speech was adapted from JFK's "Moon by the end of the Decade" speech at Rice University, Sept. 12, 1962, found at http://www.rice.edu/fondren/woodson/speech.html
I thoroughly enjoyed nuking London from 27 down to 10 the turn before my spaceship launched!
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19-02-2002 23:15
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