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mrmitchell
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---Written by Thug, temporary representative of Spamish Mitchell---
The Spam Brand Squid Shop is being reorganized.
If you need to know, Senor Mitchell has about 15 bones, and yes, he will spend 3 on Senor Dejon's weapon when he picks it up. He's in his bed-tent now. Don't bug him.
Now get lost.
Thug
Bodygaurd and Temporary Representative for Spamish Mitchell
Last edited by mrmitchell on 30-11-2002 at 07:03
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pikesfan
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I guess the two clan elders cannot go fishing in the same boat now lest it capsize and the formula for secret ingredient 7-X is lost for all time.
Last edited by pikesfan on 27-11-2002 at 08:49
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History Guy
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Reads too many books...
Oct 2001
time: 23:23
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(Luca, get ready...)
Senor Mitchell,
I give you an offer you can't refuse.
I offer you a third of my company in partnership, joining Nuclearius Winterius and myself as Presidents of the world's greatest commercial company, El Squid Company. This company will change the world, promoting Spain's importance throughout the world. Remember that it was my family that came up with the very idea of the harvesting of squids (the sick pigs). Please do consider my offer, 1/3 of all returns in squid sales. This is free to you for whatever you wish, or for donation to favorite charity (i.e. company upkeep, the poor, the military, the midget population, etc.). Please do consider, my amigo.
I await your response.
Signed in (squid) ink,
Hernan de History Guy Calamari
Undisputed Squid Baron
President of El Squid Company
Vice-President: Nuclearius Winterius
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mrmitchell
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I've got it!
Senor Calamari,
I do not wish to join you, but when our great Empire (we will have one someday...I can sense it) founds a new city, would you be willing to run the (next city) Spam Brand Squid Shop? The Spam Brand would be willing to run the (next city) El Squid, if it is in the best interests of the Spam Brand Squid Company, which it probably will remain for the foreseeable future.
Please respond ASAP to this deal...
Spamish Mitchell
President of the Spam Brand Squid Shop
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F-PRO
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Voorschoten, Zuid-Holland
Oct 2002
time: 06:23
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Dear Mrmitchell,
First I'd like to say I admire your courage to try to compete with the El Squid company. I wish you luck blah blah blah etc. etc. etc.
I have already offered to buy your squid at 20 pieces per month (IIRC). However, I tasted your squid and, to be honest, it just does not live up to my and my consumer's expectations. I suggest that you make sure you focus more on quality than on quantity, as you do now. If your squid actually becomes tastier, I might order more pieces.
Remember: the squid is the pride of all Spaniards. If you do not treat the squids withj the care they need, you may get a bad reputation. I advise you to be cautious wih your business.
Yours faithfully,
FlorisPRO
Floris Petro Rulio Olstorne
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OliverFA
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Leeds, UK
Sep 2002
time: 06:23
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Hello Señor Mitchell
We need something to feed our slaves after a hard working day.
Do you think we could have some arrangement? Maybe we could buy you the less aparent squid which you are not going to sell anyway and you could make us a discount in exchange. After all this is for the good of the Madrid village and the Spanish people.
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History Guy
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Reads too many books...
Oct 2001
time: 23:23
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It is funny, Senor Mitchell, that you should mention it, for I was thinking of a new thread, a marketplace thread, pre currency, but a marketplace all the same. There we could, in harmony, act as businessmen. What say you?
As for your offer, it intrigues me, but it serves no end. Why would I run your shop and you run my shop with only the spirit of no ill feelings as purpose? It makes no sense, it is no merging. Besides, as my amigo, Floris Petro the tavern keeper and brilliant journalist has said, the general consent is that your squid are not quite the best quality out there. Instead, they taste, well, processed. If I were to accept your deal, my own business prospects and reputation, not to mention the reputation of my good amigo and partner, Nuclearius Winterius, would suffer.
I trust that you will reconsider. If not, you still have, as head of the Commercial Trader's Union of Madrid, my blessing. Heck, you can even call me Godfather if you want to.
Hernan de History Guy Calamari
Squid Baron
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mrmitchell
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Senor Calamari,
I highly support a marketplace.
In the business of the Squid companies merging, however, I still wish for our companies to remain seperate. I have great ideas for the future of the Spam Brand, expanding to other delicacies (if they exist.  )
I'm sure that the El Squid wishes to continue refining its Squid preparation processes to the highest refinement possible, and this is a noble goal. The Spam Brand Squid Shop wants, on the other hand, to ship the Squid to the masses, and let the Spanish lowerclassmen and all the world to taste the glory of the Squid, as Squid are so perfect, it'd be pretty hard to make them taste bad.
May the best Squid merchant prosper,
Spamish Mitchell
The Only Squid Merchant that capitalizes "Squid"
President of the Spam Brand Squid Shop
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Senor Fernandez (oliverfa):
An arrangement for below-the-cut Squid? I can give it to ya for half price (0.005gold/Squid.) Does this meet your requirements for a "good Squid meal"? As in, is the price low enough? (Could it get any lower?) At 0.005gold/Squid, that's 200 Squid/1 gold. Of course, the price can get lower. It's not like we can't throw out the seasoning and cooking of the Squid. If the slaves want it they can cook it themselves.
I can still slash the price much lower, it's not like I'm paying the workers or anything. 
Spamish Mitchell
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Does anyone want to test the taste of Spam Brand? In Squid and Squid Juice!
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Spam Brand does make special order Squid!
---
Thug, go give F-PRO his first monthly Squid shipment. 10 Squid. It has been shipped.
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History Guy
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Reads too many books...
Oct 2001
time: 23:23
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Senor Mitchell,
Though I still think that it would be wiser for our companies to merge, I do agree with you on many things. Squid to the masses has always been a goal of El Squid Company. It is not simply the wealthy would can afford squid every day, but all classes. One hardly needs to look twice at our price lists to realize that it is available to all classes. The refining of squid is a major goal, this is true. The SECRET RECIPE is so highly guarded that even my mother doesn't know it. However, improvement is always being made. Indeed, today I added a little...wouldn't you like to know? Anyway, our squid is not simply affordable, but it is fine.
I raise a glass to your noble efforts, all the same.
I shall arrange for a marketplace to be constructed, pre currency, for business.
Hernan de History Guy Calamari
Undisputed Squid Baron
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mrmitchell
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Senor Calamari,
Where are your price lists? I can't find them.
Spamish Mitchell
the only Squid merchant that capitalizes "Squid"
---
Does anyone want to try Spam Brand? One Squid, free! (Rest of them, regular prices.) Please respond with your testing results.
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History Guy
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Reads too many books...
Oct 2001
time: 23:23
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What?! What?! Whaaaaaaaat?! Why, then, your products ARE more expensive then mine!!
(Gastronome, has the government started minting coins yet? Why, no sir, they don't starting minting coins 'til Currency! Aha! Thanks Gastronome. Here's a bone. Buy yourself some ice cream.)
So, the only real currency is bone, though 12 bones (chicken or patridge) are equal to one speck of gold dust, and gold, after all, is what makes Spain go round. I myself have 10 gold nuggets in the box I have here...Isn't that impressive? And the government has 10 gold...TONNES! Isn't that even more impressive?
Hernan de History Guy Calamari
Squid Baron
Expert on Money Money Money Money!
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mrmitchell
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Okay, Senor Calamari, now we are cheaper than you again.
Exactly how many specks of gold dust equal a goldpiece?
Senor Fernandez,
With the recent conversion to Bones, we now realize we can go as low as a 1/2 bone/Squid and 1/4 bone/Squid Juice. If each slave has a Squid and Squid Juice per Highsun-Meal (lunch) and a Squid Juice for a Hotsnack(afternoon snack, whatever) and a Squid and Squid Juice again for Evemeal (Dinner), then that equals to=
Reg. Quality Squid
2 Squid/day - 2 Bones
3 Squid Juice/day - 1 1/2 Bones
Discount Squid
2 Squid/day - 1 Bones
3 Squid Juice/day - 3/4 Bone
The Discount Squid Rate, rounded up to 2 Bones a day, could feed 5 slaves the most gourmet food - Squid - for lets see...if you pay 200 bones that would be 20 days of Squid. Compare to Senor Calamari...
Squid - 2 Bones
I don't think Squid Juice is available from El Squid
That makes 200 Bones towards El Squid only feeding you for about 7 days! Not to mention you need to get the liquid yourself!
(Note to Senor Calamari: All just friendly competition. )
We can cut the prices even lower, if we cut out the seasoning and cooking....like I said, the slaves can cook it themselves, it's so good it even tastes somewhat good uncooked. (However I don't recommend it. )
Senor Mitchell
the only Squid merchant that capitalizes "Squid"
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History Guy
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Reads too many books...
Oct 2001
time: 23:23
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Senor Mitchell, I beg you to reconsider my proposal. No one has actually yet purchased any of your squid, and indeed, since your opening, my business has been frequented much more often! As for prices, we can lower ours to meet yours, which will of course be splendid for business, knowing our quality. Also, we have several new dishes planned for the holiday season, including...wouldn't you like to know?
As for squid juice, our latest polls show that the average population would rather be run over by an elephant than drink it, and so we have not chosen to sell it.
Hernan de History Guy Calamari
Squid Baron
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mrmitchell
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[OOC]
An Indian war elephant perhaps?
[/OOC]
Senor Calamari,
Where do you get the data for your polls?
Also, if you'll remember F-PRO bought 120 Squid (10 Squid/Month for 12 Months.) If he wishes to cancel this deal he will still have to pay for the shipped Squid. (So far 10 Squid have been shipped.) As far as that he ordered the Squid thinking of the old currency, we do not know what for it to cost him, but we'll work something out.
And Senor Calamari: I need to know-how many specks of gold dust would equal one of these goldpeices I have here?
Senor Mitchell
the only Squid merchant that capitalizes "Squid"
Buy Spam Brand Squid!
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mrmitchell
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It has!!! Then in that case, Spam Brand must be discontinued until the cause is found!!! Senor Fernandez (oliverfa?), for the good of Spain we will have to discontinue Spam Brand until the cause of the problem is found. We will, of course, for this interference, only charge you the current rate (3 for 1). As far as Squid Juice, which has since been discontinued, we will be happy to provide you with water-fetching services for the slaves. In the event that this disruption causes you any trouble, I apologize and will repay you for any disruption of service from them, up to 10 Bones.
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27-11-2002 05:42
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