16-02-2003 00:22									#1
	National Emergency! Duct Tape Stocks Low! Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

That's right folks, at my store we couldn't get any duct tape because the warehouse is out! It's like that all over, nobody has any. Reports of hoarding...people with cases and cases of the stuff. Is it time for duct tape rationing? Is it time to head for aunt Gurdy's place in the mountains? Forgotten about the mountain people side of the family? I mean 30 years, it's time for a visit, yes?

...and what about plastic sheeting?

Stay tuned to this thread for further reports!

No really, did you buy duct tape or sheeting? Your family buy any? I've thought about it, but I live in a place where the air flows off the Pacific. A bio or chemical attack here would be very difficult. If I was in the city, or back in Jersey, I'd get some. Of course, in Jersey the chemical attack is fairly constant, so no big deal...

Getting any?

	16-02-2003 00:23									#2
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How I am supposed to fix my car now?

	16-02-2003 00:25									#3
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Derek...

	16-02-2003 00:55									#4
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Hey, US, don't tell anyone but my uncle's dog's barber's dietician heard from a hush-hush source that the Soviets are going to invade you guys next week. You better all build some bomb shelters pronto.

You are going to need:
1) Concrete
2) Wide screen TVs. At least two.
3) Lots of DVDs. Remember that if you want to play a movie on two TVs, you need to buy two copies. You don't want to get hauled off by the FBI for fair use, right?
4) Soviets are afraid of garlic, so you better be patriotic and support your National Garlic Industry by buying garlic necklaces for everyone in your family.
5) 'Em Soviets are gunna take away yer guns, so ya betta buy lots and bury them in you backyard for da revolution against da opressing Soviets. Exercise your Second Amendment Rights!

	16-02-2003 00:59									#5
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Garlic is good. Yum. yum, yum. I love to go to Gilroy (the Garlic growing capital of the world; I know a crappy claim to fame) during their annual garlic festival. They have garlic everything. Even the garlic ice cream was good.

	16-02-2003 00:59									#6
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St Leo, got all that ****, thanks.

	16-02-2003 01:06									#7
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quote: Originally posted by St Leo 4) Soviets are afraid of garlic, so you better be patriotic and support your National Garlic Industry by buying garlic necklaces for everyone in your family. 5) 'Em Soviets are gunna take away yer guns, so ya betta buy lots and bury them in you backyard for da revolution against da opressing Soviets. Exercise your Second Amendment Rights!

	16-02-2003 01:11									#8
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Soviets already tried it.

We showed 'em who the boss is.

Now ex Red Eurocoms like Tassadar take refuge in the good ole US of A.

	16-02-2003 01:15									#9
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Derek, that's good tho, they'll catch capitolism.

	16-02-2003 01:15									#10
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Reports are that the Bush Administration has revived an old defence campaign from the '50's and slightly modified it to read as:

'Duct and Cover!'

	16-02-2003 01:17									#11
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Mobius

	16-02-2003 01:21									#13
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quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker Now ex Red Eurocoms like Tassadar take refuge in the good ole US of A.

I have an obsession, I love disaster scenes (barring any dead or injured bodies, of course). Buildlings collapsing, fires......

Train wrecks........

	16-02-2003 03:04									#14
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So...you like wrecking empty trains?

	16-02-2003 03:07									#15
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quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker Soviets already tried it. We showed 'em who the boss is. Now ex Red Eurocoms like Tassadar take refuge in the good ole US of A.

They're just trying a slow motion invasion to throw us off the scent.

	16-02-2003 03:18									#16
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

It will take alot more than that to "throw us off the scent". I take it you've never been down wind of a Sov division?

	16-02-2003 03:27									#17
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The S&M sector has been hit the hardest by all this.

	16-02-2003 03:31									#18
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and it probably liked it, too.

	16-02-2003 03:36									#19
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quote: Originally posted by Azazel and it probably liked it, too.

So whats tha problem?

	16-02-2003 03:45									#21
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I think I have half an old roll of duct tape in the Garage. I'll sell it to the first person to offer me $4000 per yard*


*Plus shipping and handing.

	16-02-2003 03:55									#22
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quote: Originally posted by Azazel and it probably liked it, too.

	16-02-2003 04:24									#23
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Azazel

Oerdin, it's a deal! BUT! Don't try to pad the shipping, I'm no fool.

	16-02-2003 04:54									#24
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Personally I'm all for this slow Soviet invasion as long as it is female only.

	16-02-2003 04:59									#25
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Rooskie babes ring your bell Derek? You want to be taken prisoner by them and interogated?

	16-02-2003 05:01									#26
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"Vwhere arr de plans?"

"I think they're in my pants somewhere!"

	16-02-2003 05:14									#29
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A few things you always wanted to know about duct tape but were afraid to ask:

1. It was originally called "duck tape" because it was waterproof.

2. It was first used in ww 1 (or maybe it was ww2?) by soldiers to patch things (like boots and tents) that tore.

3. It worked great in sealing duct work, hence the modern name of ("duct" tape).

And yest I already had a couple of rolls. I use it to fix just about anything. As far as sealing up my windows I have better things to do. Besides, a terrorist wouldn't even know how to find this little town. If the whole place blew up it wouldn't even make the national news.

	16-02-2003 05:15									#30
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Lincoln! long time no see

quote: 2. It was first used in ww 1 (or maybe it was ww2?) by soldiers to patch things (like boots and tents) that tore.

never do any FAQs, if you're not sure of the answers.