19-02-2003 19:53									#1
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We have received the following telegram from the Empire of Valentino:

quote: Greetings from Valentino! The Empire of Valentino is the UN delegate for Airstrip One, and we feel we share beliefs and ways with the nations of Apolyton. Therefore we would like to form an alliance between our two regions to make them stronger. Please consider this and write back. Thank you for your time, The Empire of Valentino, Airstrip One

First of all, I took a look at his nation, and... well, the national motto did raise an eyebrow: "We throw rocks at retarded kids."

Then I took a look at the region, and... well, it looks like they just declared war on the France region on behalf of themselves and whatever allies they find... (They don't have many, but are currently looking for more...)

I have sent the following response as a preliminary answer:

quote: Greetings from Guardinia! We took a look at your nation, and while you said in your telegram that you feel you share beliefs and ways with the nations of Apolyton, your national motto seems to indicate otherwise. We also took a look at your region, where we found the following message lodged by yourself: [Begin quote] here is an exact copy of the telegram i sent to the region of france... "The region of Airstrip One and her allies has declared war on France, because we hate you. So bone appeite you cheese eatin' surrender monkeys!" [End quote] Do you want to tell us why we should want to be part of this? Unless you have a better reason than "because we hate you", then we are more inclined to talk to France than to yourself. Sincerely, Isabella Fuentes UN Ambassador Republic of Guardinia Regional Delegate of Apolyton

Comments, anyone?

	19-02-2003 20:40									#2
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Obviously they've proposed this alliance for no other reason than to serve themselves in their war.
Ceroo's recomendation is to decline this offer flat.

	19-02-2003 20:47									#3
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The Kingdom of Wine is outraged by the acts of the Airstrip One Region, for they have tried to trick us, and they have declared war on a peaceloving region, and wine exporters region such as France.

Here in the kingdom of Wine French citizens are treated with the highest regards, for they produce very good wine, almost as good as the one produced in our kingdom.

The Kingdom of Wine would like to ask all Apolytonians to help the fine region of France against those warmonger fools of Airstrip One.

Saluti

	20-02-2003 03:54									#4
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Uberlandia wants war. Uberlandia wants allies.
Uberlandia frowns on unprovoked attacks. Uberlandia, amused, throws rocks at Airstrip One.

	20-02-2003 05:51									#5
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hmm, these people sure are anti-french....

	20-02-2003 07:00									#6
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Lets see if the Franchies want allies.

	20-02-2003 07:13									#7
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...that would be a cruel twist of events for Airstrip One

	20-02-2003 11:54									#8
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The Empire of Drunken Macaque supports an alliance with the French.
The alcohol must flow!

	20-02-2003 11:55									#9
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quote: Originally posted by DarkCloud ...that would be a cruel twist of events for Airstrip One

Well, they kind of asked for it, didn't they?

I'll have a word with the French Delegate...

	20-02-2003 14:39									#10
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The UN Ambassador of Guardinia has sent the following telegram to the French UN Delegate:

quote: Greetings! It has come to our attention that the region of Airstrip One has recently declared war upon your peaceloving people, apparently for no particular reason other than "because we hate you". The nations of Apolyton are outraged by such unprovoked aggression, and further angered by the fact that Airstrip One has attempted to trick us into an alliance against you. Do you care to discuss the possibility of an alliance between France and Apolyton? Sincerely, Isabella Fuentes UN Ambassador Republic of Guardinia Regional Delegate of Apolyton

	20-02-2003 14:54									#11
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*Sits and polishes his military, now fully rebuilt after the HSA disaster*

Personally, I think we were perhaps too hasty refusing the Airstrip One proposal.....it's so much easier to slip my covert units into their countries to launch a surprise attack with our secret French allies when they think we're on their side.

	20-02-2003 15:10									#12
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By the way, we have received the following telegram from the Empire of Valentino:

quote: The Empire of Valentino is sorry that we did not justify our motto, it is only for the sake of humor, a sick humor-possibly, but everyone is different. The crude telegram we delivered to France was not just to be rude and looking for war...France has back stabbed every nation unless that nation directly helps them. They have also dropped their weapons and surrendered their forces without giving a fight, which left her allies to fight the enemy with no help. France must be punished for their lack of support of her so-called "allies".

Our answer:

quote: Well, to us it looks like you were looking for war and attempting to trick us into it by offering an alliance under false pretences. This has angered the people of Apolyton, who will not side with those who engage in unprovoked aggression. While it is possible that "France needs to be punished", we are not convinced of that at this time, and we are certainly not convinced that war is the answer. If you wish to continue this discussion, you shall at the very least have to provide some evidence to support your accusations. Furthermore, be adviced that we will also be talking to France to hear their version. Sincerely, Isabella Fuentes UN Ambassador Republic of Guardinia Regional Delegate of Apolyton

As you can see, we haven't quite slammed the door on them yet...
We also have not told them that we are discussing a possible alliance with France.

	20-02-2003 16:24									#13
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Heh heh heh.....

	21-02-2003 02:16									#14
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quote: humor

we must declare war on their region for committing such an atrocity! humoUr! with a U!

	21-02-2003 12:07									#15
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quote: Originally posted by TKG quote: humor we must declare war on their region for committing such an atrocity! humoUr! with a U!

Actually, that kind of depends on what kind of English you're writing.

British English is supposed to have a u in words like honour, valour, neighbour, armour, humour, etc.

American English tends to skip the u in these words. I.e. honor, valor, neighbor, armor, humor, etc.

So, a spelling mistake in Oxford is not necessarily a spelling mistake in New York.

	21-02-2003 13:42									#16
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*Adds Guardian's country to the list of targets to attack...

	22-02-2003 03:04									#17
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quote: Originally posted by Guardian British English is supposed to have a u in words like honour, valour, neighbour, armour, humour, etc.

that's not so much british english as it is "everyone but american" english

	23-02-2003 01:24									#18
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I say let's stab them in the back.

Good call, UR.

	23-02-2003 10:27									#19
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The United States of Jackson will not enter in any such alliance. From what we see Airstrip One would drag our region into many wars. We decide which nations we will ally with on a nation to nation basis, not region basis. Also we will only ally with nations with in our region and not with nations in other regions.

	26-02-2003 03:41									#20
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Agent 002 of the Royal Intelligence Agency of Wine, have just come to the HQ with a document directed to the Region of France from the ambassador of Airstrip One

quote: Je viens à la région de la France en tant qu'ambassadeur de la piste d'atterrissage une. C'est le concesus [...] de la piste d'atterrissage une que la France est en effet pleine d'un nombre intangable de ###### stupides. I come to the Region of France as the Ambassador from Airstrip One. It is the general concesus [...] of Airstrip One that France is indeed full of an intangable number of stupid ######.

Unfortunatly part of the document got missed in his escape back to the HQ, but it is pretty clear what are the reasons of Airstrip One for this war.

-=released to the other members of the Apolyton Region by the RIAW on 25/02/2003=-

Saluti