28-02-2003 12:14									#31
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"100 tacos for 100 dollars... this should get me through the week-long dr. who marathon..."

The best simpsons quote to never appear in the Simpsons
"And now you know why evil will always win: because good is dumb."

	28-02-2003 12:15									#32
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Homer (in a trance): No beer and no TV make Homer something something

Marge: Go crazy?

Homer: Don't mind if I do!!! *Homer goes nuts*

	28-02-2003 13:28									#33
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Its not rocket science, its brain surgery- Mr Burns

	28-02-2003 15:14									#34
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How could I forget the entire Mr. Sparkle sequence?

"For lucky best wash, use Mr. Sparkle!"

	28-02-2003 18:01									#35
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More Homer:

"Life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead."

"Mmmmm...sacrilicious."

	28-02-2003 18:05									#36
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Gentleman I'm not leaving until I get my elephant-Bart

	28-02-2003 18:15									#37
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"I love that elephant song" - Grandpa

	28-02-2003 18:19									#38
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"Heh heh, I guess you could even say that we've eaten Uder, and that he's in our stomachs being digested! ... No, wait, forget that last one." -Principal Skinner

"Hey, those kids are learning for free! Use your fake muskets as clubs, men!" -Civil War Reenactor

Female Bartender: "Hey, you said that I'd win if I had sex with you!"
Duffman: "Duffman says a lot of things he doesn't really mean. Oh yeah!"

	28-02-2003 18:23									#39
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I can't be a missionary, I don't even believe in Jebus!

	28-02-2003 18:27									#40
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(slight paraphrasing, but you'll get the idea )

Homer: I want to put some monkeys in uniform, give them some weapons, and get them to recreate the Civil War

Marge: You can't do that!

Homer: Why not? It couldn't hurt .... unless the monkeys started hurting people .... which they almost certainly would.

	28-02-2003 18:40									#41
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Remeber that X-files episode when Scully hooked Homer onto a lie detector.

Something like this...

Scully: "We are going to ask you a series of simple questions. You will answer with a simple Yes or No. Do you understand?"
Homer: "YES"
... and the lie detector blows up!

well... it not a quote but still funny...

Attachment: hs lie4.jpg
This has been downloaded 86 time(s).

	28-02-2003 20:49									#42
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Ned: Tonight's the night I do my charity work
Homer: Oh yeah, Judge made me do that once too, stupid lack of public urinals.

Krusty (on show, with monkey crawling on his head, zoo lady as guest): So why do they call this a "urine" monkey. Ooh I think I just found out.

	01-03-2003 01:01									#43
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(after Bart has been putting Grandpa's name on his cartoon strips)
Bart: But didn't you wonder why you were being sent checks for doing nothing?
Grandpa: I figured the Democrats were back in power again.

(and one as full of wisdom today as it was however many years ago)
Krusty: Saddam Hussein? They should call him So Damn Insane!

	01-03-2003 03:02									#44
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Homer: "Uh huh, uh huh.....thats great im going to eat mayonaise"
and
"try is the first step towards failure"

	01-03-2003 04:09									#45
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Ohhhh... I feel all funny... I'm in love!
...No, wait, it's a stroke.

--Abe Simpson

	02-03-2003 03:27									#46
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There is an episode, maybe a Halloween special, where Bart and Lisa are being chased by monsters in their sleep.

Bart: We could go to sleep and never wake up
Grandpa: Welcome to my world

And another

Michael Jackson: I'm Michael JAckson, from the Jacksons
Homer: I'm Homer Simpson, from the simpsons

And

Homer (to Bart, who has got a good grade card by accident): You could grow up to be a supreme court judge, like Warren Berger. Mmm... burger

	02-03-2003 03:38									#47
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Marge's Mom: "Oh Monty, you're the Devil Himself!"
Mr. Burns: "WHO TOLD YOU -- "