06-03-2003 18:52									#1
	Jared from Subway AKA Fat porno King?? Support Apolyton, buy Civilization: The Boardgame

Omg I just found this by mistake and it doesn't surprise me one bit. Read along.

excerpts:
1. Jared did not in fact have to walk to Subway to buy his sandwiches, so exercise wasn't a part of his miraculous weight loss. His dormitory had a Subway on the first floor, and he always ate there because it was the closest place to get food. The only time he'd leave his dorm room was to go to class, and even then he would pick classes based on whether they had chairs wide enough for him to sit in.

3. Before Jared was known for his miraculous weight-loss, he was known for having one of the most comprehensive porno collections on campus. Evidently people would come to check movies out of his extensive library, and many would come up to his dorm room to borrow a movie and then return it 15 minutes later.

Think of these things the next time you see another one of those Subway ads.

http://www.voy.com/32053/13778.html

Anyone surprised?

Spec.

	06-03-2003 18:54									#2
	Put an end to popups!

he's got aides you know

	06-03-2003 18:56									#3
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quote: Originally posted by Gangerolf he's got aides you know

??? He does?? How the hell did he get that? You mean that someone really slept with the guy?? Eeeeewww.


Spec.

	06-03-2003 18:57									#4
	Inflate your Upload Space

quote: ??? He does?? How the hell did he get that? You mean that someone really slept with the guy?? Eeeeewww.

I guess you don't watch South Park, do you?

	06-03-2003 18:58									#5
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quote: he's got aides you know

You mean like a PR specialist and a personal trainer?

Not too surprising, really.

	06-03-2003 20:57									#6
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And he wants everybody to have aides!

	06-03-2003 22:21									#7
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yeah, and Clay Henry has HIVes

	06-03-2003 23:09									#8
	Increase Your PM Length

Jared rocks.

	07-03-2003 01:46									#9
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quote: Originally posted by monkspider Jared rocks.

Yea....when he's watching his movies.....

	07-03-2003 01:46									#10
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Spec beat me to it

	07-03-2003 01:48									#11
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Only 15 minutes later?

	07-03-2003 01:55									#12
	Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

06-03-2003 15:46
06-03-2003 15:46

eh?

	07-03-2003 03:52									#13
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We should replace the gold standard with the pr0n standard. Not everyone likes gold. Everyone likes pr0n.

	07-03-2003 19:42									#14
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quote: Originally posted by St Leo We should replace the gold standard with the pr0n standard. Not everyone likes gold. Everyone likes pr0n.

My grand-ma doesn't.....so does the pope....well that's what he's saying anyways.....I bet him and Jared exchange movies from time to time....

	07-03-2003 19:45									#15
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"You got anything featuring Protestants?"

"Yeah, here's one: 'Back Door Baptists 4.' "

	07-03-2003 22:42									#16
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I knew it, it wasnt the subway... it was from all the calories he lost by....

	07-03-2003 23:55									#17
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Most of you guys probably:

1) Are fat
2) Watch alot of porno



Don't throw stones!

	07-03-2003 23:58									#18
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....most? MOST are not americans you know!

	08-03-2003 00:04									#19
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Candians are American vassals.

	08-03-2003 00:06									#20
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Down women!! Go porn!! My right hand would never be with another guy!

	08-03-2003 01:05									#21
	Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker Candians are American vassals.

Please, no insults.

	08-03-2003 02:41									#22
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Cleaning your hoes, Ted?

	08-03-2003 03:00									#23
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For the uninformed, what is Jared?

	08-03-2003 03:01									#24
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He's the subway guy. Who lost about 200 pounds by eating food from Subway.

	08-03-2003 03:02									#25
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The figurehead of the Subway (sandwich fastfood stores) commercials.

He lost about a bazzilion pounds, on a diet consisting of Subway sandwiches and Speed.

	08-03-2003 03:05									#26
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Great nick.. btw... 'FatPornoKing'

I wonder if its taken.

	08-03-2003 05:01									#27
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Pretty crass when society takes to comdemning a man merely for keeping a cup of yellow gunk next to his bed for weeks on end. Back in my day this was standard procedure for getting the chicks (and keeping them).

	08-03-2003 05:10									#28
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quote: Originally posted by obiwan18 Cleaning your hoes, Ted?

	08-03-2003 06:56									#29
	Suffering from ads?

That famous Woody Allen line :

Sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner you'd better have a good hand.

	08-03-2003 07:10									#30
	Re: Jared from Subway AKA Fat porno King?? Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

quote: Originally posted by Spectator 3. Before Jared was known for his miraculous weight-loss, he was known for having one of the most comprehensive porno collections on campus. Evidently people would come to check movies out of his extensive library, and many would come up to his dorm room to borrow a movie and then return it 15 minutes later.

Well, this explains what Jared was really doing with all those six inch Subway sandwiches and why he lost so much weight from not eating them.