14-03-2003 22:36									#1
	I'm shocked and appalled that I'm able to imagine a depravity Internet hasn't covered Support Apolyton

There's something subtly wrong in all fan fiction. You take established characters of some other author and make them dance like puppets. That's not right. That can't be right. Of course, that's also compounded by the fact that so much of fan fiction is pure crap. So much of everything is pure crap, but there are so many ways to screw up a fanfic. I don't believe I've ever read a fanfic story I've fully liked - then again, for the subtle wrongness reasons, I tend to avoid all fanfic. Even published fanfic like those Star Wars: Extended Universe stories. (Timothy Zahn being an exception.)

When we get to erotic fan fiction, the wrongness increases tenfold. The reasons are obvious - it can't do much to increase your fannish, non-sexual pleasures to see the lead characters in a series you love bugger each other like horny mongooses, unless you're way too involved. And then we have wonders like the ever-permanent excuse of writing erotica about child characters, "this happens the day after they turn 18"), like with that Harry Potter Erotic Fanfiction site that scarred me for life.

It seems like every series and band and whatever that existed has a fan fiction community and - logically - an erotic fan fiction community, a slash (male/male pairings, you know?) community and slash community with fursuits. All these hold within the possibility of making you a worse, more maladjusted person. But then I got an idea.

A parody, you see. What about if we took all these fan fiction writers and made them write about... US Senate? Think about it! There are certainly a lot of characters - 100 of them! There's constantly something happening, too. Most senators are male, so there's a definite potential for male/male pairing, that erotic fanfic mainstay, there. I admit this wasn't a completely original idea - I happened to stumble upon (shudder) a story which paired Al Gore with Joe Lieberman. But nothing more! There's not even Bill Clinton erotic fanfiction! No incestuous pairings of George W. Bush and Jeb Bush! Much less is there a community for people who love to write about Sen. John Edwards taking it up the poop chute from Sen. Ted Kennedy.

So I'm now a firm believer that there should be one! It's such a perfect topic to write a general parody website about the whole fan fiction community - you would believe that someone's perverted around to write endless stream of hackneyed stories about Hillary Clinton in a dominatrix uniform if someone told you something like this existed. Meanwhile, it's ever so slightly off that someone would actually write something like this. The possibilities are endless!

Of course, there would also be non-erotic fanfiction. There would be crossovers, ("in this fanfic I just wrote Sen. Dianne Feinstein joins the Sailor Scouts"), alternate histories, and of course fan fictions where a character gets raped and grows as a character because of it. And we'd have fan art, with all the typical categories - erotic fan art (ie. Sen. John Edwards taking it up the poop chute from Sen. Ted Kennedy, except as a drawing), fan art in anime style, and fan art that's just plain crap. And we'd have essays about how everyone else writes cliched, crap Senate fanfic and whether Trent (Lott) or Tom (Daschle) would make a better boyfriend for Daria, I mean majority leader for Senate.

I get these brilliant ideas all the time, and I'm too lazy to do anything about them. It's a shame. Well, I'm not just sitting around uselessly about this one - I'm sitting around and typing it to Apolyton!

SENATE EROTIC FAN FICTION FOREVER!

	14-03-2003 22:41									#2
	Support Apolyton, buy Alpha Centauri

Where would this place be without Stefu? Good show; I laughed my ass off.

	14-03-2003 23:00									#3
	Remove this text

Sounds like you've been visiting fagfiction.net too often. I try to limit myself to at most once a week, otherwise I'm always tempted to gouge out my own eyes in order to spare me the temptation to subject myself to further pain.

	14-03-2003 23:02									#4
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I'm not clicking that link to see if it's real, you know.

	14-03-2003 23:04									#5
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Wimp.

quote: OMG teh pain!! its ere agan!! liek a drane!! (ON MY SOUL) or mebbe raine!!! the twinkelly stars weep littel childrun sleep!! my teers creep acros my... UMM...

	14-03-2003 23:10									#6
	Get a bigger avatar today!

I'm not for testing my pain limit on soul-scarring agony. That's why I didn't click on that "Powerpuff Girls Smut" link on Portal of Evil when I had the chance, either.

	14-03-2003 23:54									#7
	Increase Your PM Length

How about US Congress? They seem a good writing material.

A spam I got, sorry if it was already posted:

quote: Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics: 29 have been accused of spousal abuse 7 have been arrested for fraud 19 have been accused of writing bad checks 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses 3 have done time for assault 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges 8 have been arrested for shoplifting 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year Can you guess which organization this is? Give up yet? It's the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.

	15-03-2003 01:35									#8
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization: The Boardgame

Senate's part of the Congress, isn't it?

	15-03-2003 01:58									#9
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no, AFAIK, they are two different chambers of the US legislative.

	15-03-2003 02:04									#10
	Increase Your PM Length

The "US Congress" is composed of both the House of Representatives and the Senate.

Many people (including myself) use "Congress" to mistakenly only denote the House of Reps.

Just like in Canada, Parliament is composed of both the Senate (in the UK, the House of Lords) and the House of Commons, but "Parliament" is often used to denote only the Commons.

	15-03-2003 02:57									#11
	Inflate your Upload Space

thanks, Frogger. didn't know that. ( obviously, since I just wrote something that contradicts what you've said, and I have little to no real knowledge on the subject. but that statement would include "didn't know facts", which is the same as "didn't know that", and this would mean that I am using something to prove itself, a circular argument of sorts, and therefor, it couldn't be used. but if I know that I don't know anything about it already, Why should I try to prove it, if it is already given to me as a fact? So I guess that I can say that I don't know anything on the subgect. but that would be incorrect as well. I do know SOMETHING on the subject, I just posted a post a few minutes ago on the subject. The fact that I know something doesn't mean that I know the truth, but it does mean that I don't know nothing. Therefore I remain undecided on the issue, but I wish to thank frogger for his contribution on the topic. )

	15-03-2003 03:03									#12
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uh... what did you say Azazel? 'cause that was, like, deep..man.

	15-03-2003 03:22									#13
	Inflate your Upload Space

Nothing to see here. Proceed, civilian.

	05-04-2003 00:11									#14
	Increase Your PM Length

I must apologize to loinburger. I had assumed that fagfiction.net was going to be a serious fanfic site with plenty of male-male action instead of a site which mocks bad fanfics.

I assure the man with a great avatar the words "I limit myself to once in a week" never affected my assumptions about his sexual preferences.