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Cotroneo and Jasonian, I would just like to say "Wow!". I really enjoyed reading the stories but, I just have one minor critique. Jasonian, you say that your story takes place ten years before Cotroneo's and yet he seems to say that it is taking place contemporaneously to his. It seems that a minor edit is in order.
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Jasonian
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Ruins of Jasonia Palace
Sep 1999
time: 00:13
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DinoDoc,
Thanks for the comment! It's nice to know that someone is reading and likes our work! Cotroneo and I are having some fun setting up the background of this epic, so expect many more episodes.
In my defence, I believe that Cotroneo wrote his openers, then I split my first part. Part 1 was ten years before and explained Domai's background. In between there should be some *** and a "Present Day" comment, which should show that part 2 is back up to the time with the other stories, so everything works out.
Just half of my first part is set in the past. Perhaps I should have made that more clear.
Also DinoDoc, we're looking for some more writers for this. Just pick any faction, old or new, besides Drones, Angels, Peacekeepers, or the two aliens. Tell us your pick and a background and we will send you what you need to know.
- Jasonian (back to the drone mines)
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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much appreciated man, like jason said, its nice to know someone cares about raptor....ehheheh
yes jason was write about the ten year thing.....it was small to catch, so i totally understand where your coming from. anyway jason always knows what he is doing, hes a "civer" and im a junior...lol
we have been working out the secret projects and such and almost have the map ready to go.
any ideas on how the story should evolve?
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Thanks for the invite Jasonian but, sadly, my strengths lie more in the area of the editor and not the writer.
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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should we do 50 ....then start crossfire tales part 2?
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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well it took me like 10000 minutes to load the orginall 350 pages. I would hope that doesn't occur if we ever get that big. perhaps we just make a new thread we get about half of that. I don't want any readers being mad...
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Boy, everyone is a comic these days...
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Will do....sorry i couldn't get back to you sooner, ive been very busy, i barely got a chance to finish another section of the tales....the pirate faction should be interesting.....i'll send you the information when i get a chance, probably tommorrow night, sorry im in a hurry....looking foward. If you need to contact me my email is paulcotroneo@cs.com
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dante^
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Singapore
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Hi everyone,
Hope you like my posts in the "Crossfire Tales". I know it's only two rather short posts, but I've been real busy. I'm really looking for feedback because this is the first time I've written anything for anyone else besides for my English class.
Aston
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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dante...are you my long lost brother or something......this forum thing was the first time i wrote anything outside of english class...... by any chance were you born in anchorage alaska?
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dante^
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Singapore
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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Hi all. Had a little time so I thought maybe I'd post another part. Sorry if I seem to be rambling at parts. I'll try my best to increase the length of the posts after my exams.
See ya
Aston
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Hi, I just have one question. Why are the Cyborgs involved in a war with the Drones? Are they to be the "vilians" of the story? It seems to me that a conflict with the Believers or the University could be much more interesting from a philosophical standpoint.
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Jasonian
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Ruins of Jasonia Palace
Sep 1999
time: 00:13
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DinoDoc,
Well, if the Cyborgs like Cybernetic SE and the Drones like Eudiamonic SE, then war is pretty much going to happen. But let's forget about that right now.
Try to picture the situation they are in. The Cyborgs are a small faction with lots of tech and military. They need to expand, but with 11 factions on Planet, that is difficult. After putting all the info they have in the simulators, it would make sense to attack the Drones. They're small, their cities have lots of improvements, and no one knows about them. Perfect target for a conqueror faction such as them (and yes, they are conquerors. They are NOT University clones that sit around and just collect technology)
The Cyborgs probably weren't aware of the Drone air force and the fact that people now do know about them. This war may end soon. Maybe not.
They are not just there to be villians. The villians to the writers are their own faction's enemies. To me they look evil. To the pirates, they are mean. To the Hive, they don't care one bit about the Cyborgs.
For you readers, the villians are just your favorite faction's enemies. That's it.
Full of information...
- Jason
[This message has been edited by Jasonian (edited November 17, 1999).]
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Cotroneo
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Medford, NY, USA
Oct 1999
time: 05:13
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aliens are coming....sinder is stuck at a borehole and tomahawk is being attacked....things are looking down for me...lol
thks for all the help your doing google with keeping up the word.doc, i understand how much work that consists of. Just if you could, make sure you upgraded jasons post...he changed it.
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Hi, i have started reading the Alien Crossfire story right after new years. I wanted to comment right away then, but had some problems registering you can say for the forum.
I do have some minor complaints about some minor details screws from the game and the sort. Since you guys are basing your story on the real Planet map and trying to take some of the official stories to base upon of what went on the UNS Unity, so i guess you wouldn't mind me pointing out some minor details screw ups? Liek for example, you keep refering the Unity as the USS Unity, but it is actually the UNS unity? United Nation Ship since it is a United Nation mission, not a United States one or Startrek Federation.  Also, Empaths only feel emotions and the sort, no? I notice you writers keep treating Empathic Abilities like Telepathic abilities. Telepath would be the right term for several characters mentioned. Just my point of view and opinion and not trying to put you guys down. I do like the story, indeed.
I thinking of maybe try to join in? But some problems of course which might prevent me from doing that. No a very good writer, despite how enormus my imagination and creativity is, just still have trouble with the art of writing. My grammar may suck too :/ Might not write all of the time, just once in the while since i am busy with other things and other projects/stuff on the nety i am part of. All of the Faction have been taken, like the Spartans. 
So i am wondering, can i join in? I have ideas for sidelines, like in the background while all of the Factions does huge actions and beating each other silly? My ideas might involve in a background sence to your main story some of the factions like the Spartans if of course Captain Kirk doesn't mind or anyother. I am just asking, like the rules states.
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Jasonian
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Ruins of Jasonia Palace
Sep 1999
time: 00:13
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Hello ~LordLMP~. It's nice to see a new face here, especially one that can make some comments!
On the UNS/USS issue, all I have to say is "D'oh!!" Yeah, I think I made that error in my 'Domai flashback' episodes. I'll go check after I write this and edit that away.
As for the Empath/Telepath, you're probably right. They really should be named Telepaths. But the game refers to them as Empaths. A good example: The Empath Guild secret project. The first sentence in the movie is "Symbols are they key to telempathy". So they're Telepaths, but they're named Empaths. Go figure. We don't make it up. We just write. 
Although none of our writers to do, it is perfectly legal for two writers to "duel" a faction. (both write for it) Simply email the person that writes for the faction you wish to join, tell them your ideas, and tell us if he accepts. We'll vote on it. Simple majority wins. Although it sounds complicated, it won't take more then a day or two, probably less. And we haven't voted down a writer yet, so there is little to fear.
Good luck to you, and I hope to see you on the crew.
Happy Posting!
- Jasonian
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Ok, but my ideas is about a organization, or whatever secretly created by the UN back on Earth in the early 21st century, when the global problems became worser to fight corruption and terrorism, intelligence, covert ops, special ops and prevent anyway humanity to wipe itself up anyway possible and also keep a very low profile, so low that it is not even mention in the game or official story and that only few UN individuals know of their existence and few others back on earth. over the years, the grew in size and strength, establish secret base somewhere in Greenland or North Canada, like one of the islands and their operations were quite useful and meaning. anyway, UN somehow assigned 500 to 1000 individuals on the UNS Unity to continue their mission in Alpha Centauri with what is left of humanity. Of course, they are commanded by some individual, which would be my main character, in s sence. This individual false indentity for the Unity voyage is as one of the Security Man who happened to be woken up Sandiego early on. When the problems happened on Unity, he just went along, making sure with the others of this "organization" assigned on Unity with various indentities that Colonists survives and do get on planet. So after Garland was killed and each future faction leaders take followers to commandeer the colony pods, the operatives ended up doing the same. My main character may of ended coming down with Sandiego and her followers, of course, pertending to be one. So after 10-20 years on planetfall, He and others of the organizarion that came down with Sandiego did help Establish sort of the Spartan Federation like any other followers, but still continuing secretly their original mission. But when contact was made with other factions and years later, my the Main character of mines tried making contact with the rets of the survining organization operatives and to reetablish their organixation on Planet among the Factions in secret and making a low profile. But yet they continue their mission, to defend humanity or whatever.
We can say Sandiego first of all had some hints of this organization since Planetfall do to my main characters actions and low profile ways, but she doesn't know the truth of this organition mission or whatever. Also, Lal might of been told of this organization back on Earth and that a group of them were assigned to Unity, but He wouldn't of course know who is incharge until they colonized Alpha Centauri as per original plans, but the Unity problems have sort of change that of course.
So what do you think? This might be a bit overboard, but just wondering if you would agree to this? If not, i have other less off and more related ideas.
May aswell post my main idea for the story now then later.
------------------
-LordLMP
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28-10-1999 03:13
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