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GeneralTacticus
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of Melbourne, Australia
Dec 2001
time: 15:28
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The University Science Monitor, Issue #2 – The Official Newspaper of the Planet University of Technology
New Bases Founded – “We are the best,” says Dean
by GeneralTacticus
The University Department of Social Sciences recently announced that colonists in their employ had constructed two new bases near our first, University Base. Dean Archaic, head of the Department, noted that after this occurred, “Our power ranking relative to the others shot up far beyond any of the other faction save those of Miriam Godwinson’s Lord’s Believers, and is now close to them. This is a clear indication of the superiority of our factional philosophy to our rivals.”
Statisticians have noted that this led to an enormous increase in the speed of University research, to the extent that the University will likely overtake Datatech Sinder Roze of the Data Angels in technology levels by next year, and then leave them behind in the dust.
Scientists Begin Investigation of Mysterious ‘Xenofungus’
by GeneralTacticus
Last week, Professor of the Department of Pure Sciences AdamTG02 authorized a group of scientists formerly members of the Xenobiology Department on board the Unity to begin investigating the mysterious red fungus which has been found growing near several University bases. No conclusive results have been released yet, but team members (working in the new base of Zoloto-Gold) expressed confidence that they would make good progress. Expect more news as the project continues.
Cause of Temporal Anomaly Identified
by GeneralTacticus
Aurelio Sieligowski, spokesman for the freelance group researching the temporal anomaly mentioned in the last issue of this newspaper, said that his team had succeeded in isolating the cause of the anomaly. According to him, the temporal rift occurred when a science team subjected the monolith to high-powered radio waves, which it apparently interpreted as an attack. IT responded by, he said, “Effectively placing itself in a different universe to its “assailants”.” He went on to say that he was hoping that another, similar monolith would be discovered elsewhere by University scouts, which would allow for a more careful and in-depth examination to see what they were and how they worked.
Research Subjects Wanted
Advertisement by The School of Social Sciences
University Researchers are currently looking for volunteers suffering from PUSS (Post Unity Stress Syndrome) for a study on the effects of stressful situations on the human psyche. All volunteers (or their next of kin) will be suitably compensated upon completion of the study. Please send all applications in the end of the week, as positions are limited.
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25-05-2003 10:34
I know I'm not one to talk,but just thought I'd mention it 
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