13-06-2003 21:11									#1
	Unfortunate headlines Support Apolyton, buy Galactic Civilizations

http://www.dangerhere.com/

	13-06-2003 21:13									#2
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And he seems really pleased about it.

	13-06-2003 21:19									#3
	Support Apolyton, pre-order Civilization IV

I guess I can roll out this one again.

50 Actual Newspaper Headlines (collected by actual journalists)>>
>
1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says>>
2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers>>
3. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted>>
4. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case>>
5. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents >>
6. Farmer Bill Dies in House>> 7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms>>
8. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?>>
9. Stud Tires Out>>
10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope>>
11. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over>>
12. Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again>>
13. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands>>
14. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms>>
15. Eye Drops off Shelf>>
16. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids>>
17. Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead>>
18. Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim>>
19. Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66>>
20. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax>>
21. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told>>
22. Miners Refuse to Work after Death> >
23. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant>>
24. Stolen Painting Found by Tree>>
25. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies> >
26. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter>>
27. Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years>>
28. Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One>>
29. Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84>>
30. War Dims Hope for Peace>>
31. If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While>>
32. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures>>
33. Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide>>
34. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge>>
35. Deer Kill 17,000>>
36. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead> >
37. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge>>
38. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group>>
39. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft>>
40. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks >>
41. Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy>>
42. Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire>>
43. British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply>>
44. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood>>
45. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees>>
46. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half>>
47. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies>>
48. Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing>>
49. Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing>>
50. Air Head Fired

	13-06-2003 21:33									#5
	Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

quote: Originally posted by rah 44. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood>>

"Heya, big boy, looking for a good time? ... Hello? ... Helloooo?"

	13-06-2003 21:36									#6
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization 2

Well there's a legendary one but it will be little hard to translate...

in the '50s or something one of the biggest newspapers had as its first title on the front page some revolt of the Polish people who were demanding more food.

So the title was meant to be: "The Poles pour out to the streets of Warsaw demanding more bread"


Only a mistake was made and a letter was replaced with another one. Namely "Psomi" (bread) became "Psoli" (=d!cks).


So the other day dumbfounded, the readers read on the front page of the newspaper that "Poles pour out to the streets of Warsaw demanding more d!cks".

	13-06-2003 21:40									#7
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

The Poles have their priorities right!

	13-06-2003 21:44									#9
	Increase the size of your Attachments

quote: Originally posted by rah I guess I can roll out this one again. 50 Actual Newspaper Headlines (collected by actual journalists)>> > 1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says>> 2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers>> 3. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted>> 4. Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case>> 5. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents >> 6. Farmer Bill Dies in House>> 7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms>> 8. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?>> 9. Stud Tires Out>> 10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope>> 11. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over>> 12. Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again>> 13. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands>> 14. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms>> 15. Eye Drops off Shelf>> 16. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids>> 17. Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead>> 18. Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim>> 19. Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66>> 20. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax>> 21. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told>> 22. Miners Refuse to Work after Death> > 23. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant>> 24. Stolen Painting Found by Tree>> 25. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies> > 26. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter>> 27. Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years>> 28. Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One>> 29. Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84>> 30. War Dims Hope for Peace>> 31. If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While>> 32. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures>> 33. Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide>> 34. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge>> 35. Deer Kill 17,000>> 36. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead> > 37. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge>> 38. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group>> 39. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft>> 40. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks >> 41. Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy>> 42. Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire>> 43. British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply>> 44. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood>> 45. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees>> 46. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half>> 47. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies>> 48. Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing>> 49. Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing>> 50. Air Head Fired

	13-06-2003 21:57									#10
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool

	13-06-2003 22:15									#11
	Enter the AD-FREE zone

@ rah

	13-06-2003 22:24									#12
	Support Apolyton, buy Call to Power 2

quote: Originally posted by Immortal Wombat quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool quoting 50 lines simply to make a one-smilie response makes you cool

	13-06-2003 22:28									#13
	Got spare money?

Me and Uber are now members of the cool group.

	13-06-2003 22:30									#14
	Support Apolyton, pre-order Civilization IV

heres one:

Attachment: excited_head_job.jpg
This has been downloaded 108 time(s).

	13-06-2003 22:32									#15
	Put an end to popups!

Ming Math:

cool group = PCR

	13-06-2003 22:35									#16
	Full PM-box? Change here!

quote: Originally posted by Ming Ming Math: cool group = PCR

Well I will remember not to do THAT again then.

	13-06-2003 22:38									#17
	Suffering from ads?

quote: Originally posted by Ming Ming Math: cool group = PCR

god ming, just because you had issues with the cool kids in highschool doesn't mean you have to hate them on the interweb.

jeebus.

	13-06-2003 22:53									#18
	Support Apolyton, buy Call to Power 2

One from the local paper about 9 months ago:

"Rapists lawyer says he did a bad job"

Damn lawyers.

	13-06-2003 23:00									#19
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

Best headline ever in a Finnish evening paper would be, about an year or a half back, "Police interrupts drug teens' orgy: Naked teen girls attack policemen"

That was a proud moment in Finnish journalism, let me tell you.

Of course, it was probably quite intentional and thus doesn't really fit the thread, but I can mention it anyway, dammit.

	13-06-2003 23:03									#20
	Get a bigger avatar today!

Got a few laughs out of this thread.

One famous misprounciation (not a headline as such) but some govt flunkey stood up in Parliament a few years ago and began his speech.

"These cuts in defence"... only he added an n to cuts.

Now that's why I call a Freudian slip.

	13-06-2003 23:37									#22
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Stefu, OMG! I remember that! That was the best day of journalism ever. The best part was when the kids refused to stop having sex? And then girls attacked cops..

	13-06-2003 23:38									#23
	Support Apolyton

Then there was the famous incident where Charles de Gaulle and his wife were visiting England, and his wife was asked by someone at a dinner what she thought was the best part of their loving marriage. Madame de Gaulle responded, "a penis."

Everyone was stunned, until Charles leaned over and said, "My dear, I believe it is pronounced, 'happiness.'"

	13-06-2003 23:38									#24
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

I've got a whole book of Colemanballs at home...

"Policemen Found Drunk In Shop Window"
"Council To Make Safe Danger Spots"
"Police Shot Man With Knife"
"Mr Banana: No Danger Of Split"

	13-06-2003 23:44									#25
	Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

tragedy

Attachment: canadian air tragedy.jpg
This has been downloaded 73 time(s).

	14-06-2003 00:30									#26
	Browse Apolyton AD-FREE

quote: 10. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope>>

That's the best right there .

	14-06-2003 00:36									#27
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization: The Boardgame

Great stuff!

	14-06-2003 11:26									#28
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

does anyone have pictures of that orgy? I need them for research.

	14-06-2003 15:41									#29
	Remove this text

"Urologist Honored by Peers"

and a story about a bridge accident, with a typo:
"Bride Stuck Open, Traffic Backed Up for Miles"

	14-06-2003 16:40									#30
	Tired of ads?

Not sure if this is unfortunate, but at least mildly amusing:

"Hu To Unveil Party Reform."