17-07-2003 20:41									#1
	How come Jehova's witnesses only go bothering people door to door in nice weather? Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

The work of Jesus only needs to be done when its warm weather? Is not my soul being damned in the winter too?


Personally I like Jehova's witnesses..... They seem to have a "10 things to tell Jews" kinda a canned list that they memorize ahead of time that they are supposed to say to Jews, and its ever so much fun refuting them all in my doorway LOL!

The Morman ones are nice though, a group came to my house when I was alone last year and we had a nice, politce discussion in my doorway for a half an hour, they left on a good note and blessed me I figured since I was polite and showed interest I'd be put on the "Morman Mailing List"-sent a bible and harrased, but I wasent !

*gives a shoutout to any mormans on Apolyton*

	17-07-2003 20:45									#2
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I was harassed by a couple of Mormon thugs after I chatted with them for 2.5 hours one drunken afternoon... They stalked me for 3 weeks!!!! Guess I deserved it when I told them that I find god in the bottom of beer cans

As for the ol' JW's I think their religion sucks. I mean, you can't celebrate anything! No birthdays, weddings, even christmas is right out. If I was a JW I would certainly wait til the weather was nice before I went and peddled my crapy, no-fun god...

	17-07-2003 20:45									#3
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Why does the Fuller Brush Man only come in sunny weather?

	18-07-2003 08:25									#4
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I'm trying to get a bunch of Buddhists together with me and start going door-to-door, but they keep telling me it's against our religion.

They didn't go for the Buddhist jihad, either. Those guys can be such sticks-in-the-mud sometimes

	18-07-2003 08:29									#6
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I have one side of the Family that Are JW's..........They never bring up Their Beliefs to my me..........They are coscientious objecters but they didnt mind me protecting their freedoms when I was In the Navy.
I often wonder when they go into their spiel if I can drop my pants & tell them to worship at my Altar

Last edited by CorpusScorpius on 18-07-2003 at 08:37

	18-07-2003 08:34									#7
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Actually, it's a little known fact, but God only answers prayers made during sunny weather. Clouds interfere with Divine reception and stuff.

That's why all those scientific study that failed to find a correlation between prayer and stuff failed. They were all conducted during the winter university session and clouds were strewn about willy nilly.

	18-07-2003 08:35									#8
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screw them. They think because im catholic im some kind of vile uncleaned heathen. They can suck on my left one.

Everytime they come to the door its fun.

	18-07-2003 08:45									#9
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If you let them suck on your left one, wouldn't that make you a vile unclean heathen?

	18-07-2003 08:46									#10
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov If you let them suck on your left one, wouldn't that make you a vile unclean heathen?

	18-07-2003 10:56									#11
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Is that the only one left?

	18-07-2003 11:24									#12
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just because they are christians, doesn't mean they are stupid.

	18-07-2003 11:26									#13
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quote: Originally posted by faded glory screw them. They think because im catholic im some kind of vile uncleaned heathen.

You mean you're not a vile uncleaned heathen?


tsk, tsk.

	18-07-2003 11:37									#14
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quote: just because they are christians, doesn't mean they are stupid.

I don't really even feel right calling them christians. They are somewhat stupid, but not because they are christians. Mind you, I don't think Jehova's Witnesses themselves as people are stupid, but the Watchtower organisation they follow and abide is pretty much the root of all the problems I have with their beliefs and actions. Preaching the apocalypse for the past century, the blood donation and receiving policy, not to mention the treatment we philistines and, more importantly, former JWs get... here they don't even really educate themselves because it's "useless", they world is going to end soon anyway so what's the point?

	18-07-2003 14:06									#15
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They visited me some years ago. What this guy said was just too much. He asked me what I was doing and I replied I was a molecular biologist.
He then said this: "How interesting! We are going to visit a couple of girls upstairs from you later and they are also biologists. And do you know what? (whispering) They believe in monkeys!"

Saved my day

	18-07-2003 14:38									#16
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quote: Originally posted by Combat Ingrid They visited me some years ago. What this guy said was just too much. He asked me what I was doing and I replied I was a molecular biologist. He then said this: "How interesting! We are going to visit a couple of girls upstairs from you later and they are also biologists. And do you know what? (whispering) They believe in monkeys!" Saved my day

ROFL

Reminds me of the paper some Colleague of mine someday got, while he walked in the Parc.
Don´t know from which religious community it was, but in the paper they desperately tried to explain, why the Theory of Evolution must be wrong (and of course the story of Human Creation as written in the Bible must be literally right )

We had a good laugh about the Paper (never understood why he hadn´t told them that he [same as me] was a Student of Biology and tried to convince them of the truth of the TOE [although it is most of the times fruitless to argue against religious zealots ] )

	18-07-2003 15:10									#17
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I still think a Buddhist Jihad woulda shocked the hell out of almost everyone in the world.

Damn Zen monks. They never wanna do what I wanna do!

	18-07-2003 15:45									#18
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Don't they believe that only a few hundred thousand people will ever got to heaven.(the ones who give lots of money no doubt)

	18-07-2003 16:30									#19
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144.000 which is 12 * 12.000
Don´t know why but I think it has something to do with the 12 as a holy number.

	18-07-2003 17:01									#20
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It seems you don't need to give them money to be one of "the chosen". Even though I believe in monkeys , listen to death metal, and refused to read the bible with these guys, they still claimed I was one of the (144.000) chosen. I think they knew because I have a holy mark on my forehead or something like that

	18-07-2003 18:19									#21
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So if your chosen you can do what you want?

	18-07-2003 18:26									#22
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No. If I remember correctly, the chosen ones will together build the new Jerusalem, the paradise where everything will be so great and nice and so on

At least we don't have to burn for an eternal eternity

	18-07-2003 19:03									#23
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Hey, if I were a buddhist, I'd have no problem with a Jihad, or maybe even some plain old rioting...

	19-07-2003 04:08									#24
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No. If I remember correctly, the chosen ones will together build the new Jerusalem, the paradise where everything will be so great and nice and so on

Could have picked a better name. Jerusalem has never been that great a city.

Something like "Damascus" might be a better choice.:P

	19-07-2003 04:28									#25
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I was just thinking of throwing poo on oversized SUV's, so you guys are WAY ahead of me.

I was thinking how the words 'Aer Lingus' make me feel like a giggling schoolgirl. I am, like, SO mature.

	19-07-2003 05:21									#26
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quote: I was thinking how the words 'Aer Lingus' make me feel like a giggling schoolgirl. I am, like, SO mature.

I had that same problem in Latin classes when the teacher would use the word 'cum'. Damn, it was annoying. I am not even a girl for goodness' sake.

	19-07-2003 11:55									#27
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I don't believe in monkeys

	19-07-2003 21:41									#28
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quote: 144.000 which is 12 * 12.000 Don´t know why but I think it has something to do with the 12 as a holy number.

The 12 trbies of Israel of course

	20-07-2003 09:09									#29
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WARNING: Possibly offensive to sensitive viewers.

How come 12 is a holy number (e.g. number of apostles, number of tribes) but if you add Jesus to the mix you get 13, which is supposedly a 'bad-luck' number in the US, and if you add God in there you get 14, THE bad-luck number of China.

(Brought to you by the numbers 12, 13, and 14 and the letters 'F' and 'U'!)

	20-07-2003 19:46									#30
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I think you're looking too far into this, st.

Then again, what caused 13+14 to be bad numbers