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Lorizael
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The Cult Wins
Sep 2001
time: 00:29
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By Friday July 25th, I will be dead. Sure as the sun will rise on that day, I won't see it set.
On Friday I am getting all four of my wisdom teeth pulled. This is a pretty normal thing. But, as you all know, getting your teeth pulled is not a tremendously fun activity. In fact, it is horribly painful. Because of this, I will be sedated during the operation. Unconsciousness will be artificially induced in me.
This is, once again, a fairly normal thing. It happens to thousands of people everyday and nothing goes wrong.
Every so often, however, something will go wrong. The chances of this happening are so small as to be negligible, really. But, the chances are not zero. On rare occasions, people simply don't wake up from going under. They cannot be revived. They die.
As I said, this rarely happens. But, as I also said, the chances are not zero. And I am a paranoid individual with far too much time for thinking. Because I think too much, I will begin to fear that this could actually happen to me.
This excess of thinking will do another thing as well. It will cause me to realize that sometimes, a person can start to believe something so much, that it actually becomes true. This can happen with diseases; it's called a psychosomatic effect.
In other words, my fear could cause a psychosomatic effect so that while I am unconscious and having my teeth wrenched, I will make myself believe that I won't wake up, and so I won't.
But it doesn't stop there. Remember, I think too much.
I fear that my fear for the psychosomatic effect may make me fear that I may produce this delusion, and because of that, I will fear it even more.
This cycle of fearing the fear can go on forever, unfortunately. And what this means is that by the time I get to the operation, I will fear death, fear the effect, and fear my own fear so much that my death will, in fact, be inevitable.
And even if it's not inevitable, I will fear so much that it is, that it will become that way.
Vicious circle.
I need you all at Apolyton to save me.
I need you guys to either show a fault in my logic, stop me from thinking too much, get rid of my fear of death, or prove to me conclusively that my fear cannot induce a psychosomatic effect that will kill me.
Otherwise, I'm a goner.
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st_swithin
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10069
Nov 2002
time: 05:29
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Hey, before you go, I just wanted to let you know that you're already authorised to make deposits into my bank account or to the IRS.
But the nitrous is fun, though.
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Zylka
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Fake incredible pain, like cry etc. and then innocently ask for 10mg OxyContins. You can at least get some percs for something like this... but a small OC is equivalent to taking EIGHT at once! More euphoria than even heroin!!!
Good luck
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st_swithin
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10069
Nov 2002
time: 05:29
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I have a couple of extra teeth that apparently may never come in. The doc found them when they had to remove all of my horribly impacted wt's. So they remove the ones associated with 'wisdom' and leave me the ones associated with 'vestigial'. I am SO pleased.
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Lorizael
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The Cult Wins
Sep 2001
time: 00:29
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quote:
Originally posted by SuperSneak
OK, as for 'noid boy here--it doesn't matter, because once you are sedated, your ability to psychosomatically kill yourself will be reduced, as your subconscious will be active and unable to fulfill its killer functions on a covert level.
Its a paradox I'm afraid you will survive.
*****.
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Wohoo! Thank you! That's what I was looking for. Along with thinking too much, and being incredibly paranoid, I am also very, very logical. Knowing that there is nothing to fear, the fear goes away.
Then again, there is still the chance that I die by the drugs and not my ****ed up brain, but that's unavoidable.
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Zylka
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Lorizael,
Thank you for your question. As we all know oral surgery is indeed a risky business - but you (as an American) have a God given right to refuse the gasses they currently plan to put you under with. Gasses are a very volatile element in nature, producing such catastrophies as the Hindenburg, Mushroom clouds from nuclear explosions, and even sudden death in humans.
What you will indeed want to do is undergo CONSCIOUS surgery at your own medication - I suggest morphine (the reason OxyContin is not used for surgery is its emphasis on euphoria rather than body load). Morphine is a perfectly suitable substance for pseudo-sedation, especially if your neighborhood does not produce any Fentanyl.
What you will need is two (2) 30mg time released capsules, found readily with any local marijuana, cocaine or PCP dealer at about 25$ per unit. Crush the pills as best possible with a large coin or hammer, and dump the resulting powder into a large spoon. From here you will want to add about 30 units of water from a syringe and mix (a medical guide for buying syringes can be found here). Mix the solution until consistent - then add heat to the bottom of the spoon: moving open flame back and forth to avoid boiling. Once whispers appear from the substance, mix vigorously and then let cool down.
Proceed to draw the solution into the syringe through a small cotton filter, tie your arm to settle and magnify veins - and inject into the biggest, most stable one you can find.
This must all be done in the washroom of the oral surgeon's office - for driving to the clinic while heavily sedated is UNSAFE and irresponisble. Good luck, and best wishes.
-Doc
Last edited by Zylka on 20-07-2003 at 10:52
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MichaeltheGreat
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Apolyton Grand Executioner
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mooning the house that Ruth built.
Oct 1999
time: 21:29
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quote:
Originally posted by Lorizael
You know, as funny as all this is, no one here has told me how not to die. |
If you're under general anesthesia, (IIRC, it's stage 3, plane 4, been a while since I read the SF medic's field manual, which tells you how to do it in the boonies when you have no real facilities.), you are physiologically below the level commonly associated with either sleep or unconsciousness - brain activity isn't the same, involuntary reflexes aren't there or are very limited (why your muscles don't push on the knife when the doc cuts you for real surgery.)
As such, you don't have anything like normal dream states or "subconscious" states. What you do sometimes get is an agitated, sometimes mildly to moderately violent (muscle reactions, head whipping and such, not running after people with a chainsaw  ) reaction and some nausea coming out of anesthesia. So by the time you're able to get mentally weird again, instead of in near rutabaga-like nirvana, you're already essentially awake and over it.
Not sure how the dental version of general anasthesia works, I haven't been ***** enough to need it - when I had my wisdoms done, I did novocaine, then biked 20 miles back to work. (which was 25 miles from home.) Spitting out the blood kept the holes cleaned out initially, then the salt water trick worked just fine.
I assume since they don't have a gas passer right there on the scene, it's not near as involved as anesthesia for real surgery, but you probably get close enough to rutabaga-nirvana for normal neuroses and stuff to disappear for the time being. You can do it under novocaine - the only thing that's a bit disconcerting, since dentists like you flat on your back, is the blood and saliva draining into the back of your throat, but that's what that little suction thingy is for. You don't really bleed that much, anyway. The other thing, but it's no biggy if you're not a total pencil-neck, is they have to sort of wrestle the things out of their nice snuggly little nest in your jaw and your maxillary bone (upper jaw/face bone) That's just a little tug of war, and you can hear a little crunching, but the novocaine assures you don't actually feel pain - you're just aware that the dentist is gator rassling' in the back of your mouth.
Hope this helps.
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20-07-2003 09:33
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