 |
| |
|
|
Enigma_Nova
|
|
Having psychological conditions (Repressed memory, Post-Traumatic Stress) I believe my experiences show the WRONG way.
They claim that they raised me 'normally', without smacking, with plenty of calm reasoning, and a lot of love.
My extreme mental abilities caused me to decide my own path and follow it, "Therefore, The Self's actions are performed, in case the Outside's actions are wrong".
I always had and always will be belligerent and hateful, because of the intolerance I was extended in my youth. My mother may be dying, but I still want revenge for the ideology that enslaved her.
I'm a vigilante these days.
To this end, I will not harm or attack children based on what they believe, so long as they DO have ideas.
While my own capacity for joy is gone, I endeavour to ensure that joy is present in others, by removing what causes my own pain.
(Yes this presumes that others have the same emotional responses as I - for the point of Natural Selection and preserving my kind, I choose the path that helps those similar to me)
Anyone who would attack their children for a differing ideology is the enemy in my books; most of you here are enemies.
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Whaleboy
|
 |
Please make all cheques payable to Whaleboy
Jan 2003
time: 05:32
|
|
quote:
Whaleboy, I disagree with your reasoning. Kids can't fight back, sure, but that's not the situation. If you slap your kid, s/he is not supposed to fight back. It's not a fight situation.
|
Conceded, but I, as a fully grown adult, can do a hell of a lot more harm with a standard slap, than I can with the same slap to someone of my age. Kids are very very delicate, imo physical violence is unacceptable.
quote:
It's a bigger mistake to hit a child in anger. Or shout in anger. IMO you can shout, you can slap'em up a bit, but not when you are angry yourself.
|
Shouting, for fear purposes, is a sign that you have lost control... the stress response causes us to raise our voices etc. More acceptable than hitting of course, indeed the fear factor is useful, but the long term consequences of verbal assault are a numbed version of physical. The LT consequences of physical punishment, as I well know, are unacceptable.
quote:
But... I don't know what you meant with hitting,.... I mean little slapping maybe on the back of the head, NOT on the face and not too hard either. I don't know, maybe I can't do this, I must get a wife who beats my kids in the back of their heads. I think belt is far more brutal than slap. Or thumb up the butt.
|
Hitting on the head is a BIG no-no. The safest place would be the arse, where the padding is going to cause less damage, but even that is assault imo. My previous argument about the parent who has lost control holds true.
While I have no children, I have three little brothers, and with the latter two, I have been thrust into the role of parent due to ours being absent for most of the time. I know how annoying they are, and what a challenge it is to get them into line, yet I have NEVER found it either necessary to hit them, or had an overwhelming desire to do so. Simple logic (do this or you wont get this), a calming voice/presense, use of intimidation as a last resort, bribery, walking away, giving them something to do, and showing in sometimes graphic terms the effects of some of their behaviour (i.e. the "tragedy of violence" featuring Hector the teddy bear and Ben the whale).
To any parents out there who have been in the position where you would hit your child: Read some texts on child psychology. It will help you understand your child far more, and present alternative solutions to the angry, emotional, and frankly disturbing use of corporal punishment; a quick fix to someone who is incompetant enough to lose control.
To be blunt, I consider anyone who hits their children to be abusing them. I'm sorry if that offends you.
|
|
| |
|
| |
|
|
|
Kaak
|
|
I completely agree gangerolf. I think encouragement and rewards are necessary, but I think rewards should be reserved for "above expected" performance, or randomly given, just because you are a "good kid." I don't think rewards should be dangled in front of the child's face as a carrott.
Also, I think it is important that punishment only given when the one doing it is calm. Spanking out of anger is never okay, but spanking is imo.
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Dr Strangelove
|
|
The usual mode of punishment in my family was the belt, alternating at times with a cane or a paddle. Every once in a while the old man would haul off and wallop one of us. One time when we were misbehaving in the back seat he managed to turn around and smack all three of us at once. Sometimes we were subjected to hard labor for punishment. We were once assigned to dig up and haul off a section of the driveway as punishment for a transgression. Ironically, even though I wasn't involved in the misdeed (distilling liquor) I wound up being draftyed into the work detail even as the primary perpetrator ran off. So at the tender age of nine I learned how to push an industrial sized wheelbarrow filled with asphalt and rock up a hill. Putting me on the pickaxe OTOH was pretty much useless, I didn't have enough muscle to hack off pieces of asphalt.
|
|
| |
|
| |
|
|
|
Whaleboy
|
|
Please make all cheques payable to Whaleboy
Jan 2003
time: 05:32
|
|
quote:
But anyway, Anyone that thinks a light spanking is child abuse either doesn't have their own kids or is stoned. I think you qualify for both.
|
I come close enough considering my age. Nonetheless, my family gives me more experience with kids than, for example, my own mother had with me before my brothers were born. I'd say that for a non-parent, my childcare experience is good enough to be taken seriously in such matters, and its application when looking after my younger bros (unfortunately that seems to be taking up more of my time), certainly proves effective.
Nonetheless, you fail to critique my points and merely deride them with an ad hominem. Perhaps you would care to provide your own argument and or a critique of mine.
If I had money, I'd be stoned. Since the former is not the case, neither is the latter  .
Laz: Stewie ruled!!! Militant babies? Before Family Guy, I only thought they were confined to the West Bank!
|
|
| |
All times are GMT. The time now is 05:32.
Apolyton Time is 00:32. |
top of page
|
| archivepost |
|
Forum Rules:
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
|
HTML code is ON
vB code is ON
Smilies are ON
[IMG] code is ON
|
|
|
|
|
|
04-12-2003 21:27
). But not all children are alike, I remember that even as a child I was confused when kids didn't behave well.
|