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Dr Strangelove
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While I agree that the elderly lady had no right to butt in, and that the elderly can often be inappropriately hostile, you have to give some consideration to the source of their bad manners. Granted some of them probably never were civil people to begin with, after all even p***ks get old, but often the cantankerous old coot is someone who once was a decent person who is declining not only in physical well-being, but in mental capacity as well. It's both frustrating and frightening to endure the gradual loss of memory and competence. It is very much in the usual manner of human character to deny and even project one's own faults, this is very true of those elderly who have begun to develop dementia. A woman who once was a competent, respected and admired wife, mother, and/or worker finds herself loosing the capacity to perform simple tasks. Often they begin blaming others for their failings, especially when the capacity for insight begins to fail too. Eventually it seems like they are alone against a hostile world, and they affect a hostile front to face it with.
In addition to mental frailities, physical frailities can contribute to the older person's bad demeanor. Not everyone with arthitis looks like they're ready to fall over. Common osteoarthritis generally is not accompanied by easily visible deformities early in its course, but may still cause chronic pain, which in turn erodes a person's composure over time. The decay of the special senses likewise may ruin an older person's behavior, especially if it accompanies dementia as well. Who knows, the old bat may not have seen you until she got close to the ATM machine, and then may have thought that it was you encroaching on her.
I'm not trying to make you feel bad about the encounter, I'm just trying to put it into perspective. Who knows, I may be wrong. Perhaps she was in fact a senior citizen in perfect health who simply has an attitude problem. In that case you did her a favor, 'cause eventually she may begin to fail and then will need some friends, so she better change her attitude now while she till can. If she's just demented then you can comfort yourself with the knowledge that she probably has forgotten you by now. 
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09-12-2003 04:08
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