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The Emperor Fabulous
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Apolyton's Resident Actor-in-Training
Aug 1999
time: 00:33
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(Let's try this again...)
Two-double-oh-three was a great year for movies. I'm not sure 2004 will be as great, but there are certainly some notable releases coming. With Lord of the Rings and The Matrix finished, what movie will build a new franchise, or what franchises will become legendary?
Here's some info about the releases:
Spider-Man 2
Sequel to 2002's "Spider-Man". Stars Tobey McGuire, Kirsten Dunst, and features Doc Ock as the villain.
Alien vs. Predator
Combination of popular movie franchises Alien and Predator.
The Village
M. Night Shyamalan's new movie with Joquin Phoenix, about a Pennsylvania town of 60 surrounded by mythical people.
Shrek 2
Sequel to Mike Meyer's 2002 "Shrek". Animated feature about a storybook ogre.
Jersey Girl
Kevin Smith's new picture staring Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler about a man who must adapt to new wife and 6-year-old daughter. Also with Jennifer Lopez.
Troy
Blockbuster based on The Illiad, staring heavyweights Brad Pitt, Orlando Bloom, Eric Bana, and Brian Cox, directed by Wolfgang Peterson (Das Boot).
Kill Bill Vol. 2
Really the second part of one movie, the continuation of Kill Bill Vol. 1, this time with Samuel L. Jackson added to the mix.
The Incredibles
Animated feature by Pixar about a middle-aged Super Hero, voiced by Coach Craig T. Nelson.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
This movie is what you get when you combine Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Elijah Wood, Kirten Dunst, Tom Wilkinson, director Michel Gondry, and screenwriter Charlie Kaufman (Being John Malkovich, Adaptation).
The Ladykillers
A new Coen Brother's picture, starring Tom Hanks who plays a Mark Twain-southern drawl-type leading a gang of hoodlums in a large crime.
The Passion of Christ
Mel Gibson's picture of the last 2 hours of J. H. C.'s life. In Aramaic and Latin, possibly with subtitles.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkabann
Based on the 3rd Harry Potter novel.
Garfield
Live action adaptation of the world-wide comic star cat.
Club Dread
New Broken Lizard movie, the guys who wrote, directed, and starred in 2002's "Super Troopers".
The Punisher
Adaptation of the comic book of the same name.
The Day After Tomorrow
Huge multi-million dollar movie by the creators of Independence Day. The world is attacked not by aliens, but by the weather, like a second Great Deluge of biblical proportions.
J. M. Barrie's Neverland
Based on Barrie (played by Johnny Depp), the writer of Peter Pan.
The Spongebob Squarepants Movie
Hero of Nickelodeon's animated TV Series.
Alexander
Another Greek-era movie, this one based on Alexander the Great, starring Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, and Val Kilmer, and directed by master Oliver Stone.
The Aviator
Biopic of Howard Hughes, starring Alec Baldwin, Cate Blanchett and Leo D.
Rocky VI
The legendary boxer is lured out of retirement for one last fight (we hope.)
The Brothers Grimm
Dark fantasy by Terry Gilliam about the famous fable writers.
Osama
Based on a true story, a woman hides her daughter as a boy named Osama, attempting to give her a decent life while fearing the Taliban.
Others that come out are The Phantom of the Opera, Collateral (Tom Cruise), Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman), comic book adaptations Blade: Trinity, Ghost Rider, Catwoman, Hellboy and Constantine, sequels to Ocean's 11, The Mask, Resident Evil, Mission Impossible, Dirty Dancing, Starship Troopers, Dude Where's My Car?, and XXX, adaptations of The Polar Express, The A-Team, Alone in the Dark, and Starsky & Hutch, plus a host more.
I personally can't wait for Eternal Sunshine, Spider-Man 2, and The Ladykillers.
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Guynemer
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You rat bastard. Now I have to cut and paste my reply in the other thread.
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Guynemer
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quote:
Originally posted by The Emperor Fabulous
Spider-Man 2
Sequel to 2002's "Spider-Man". Stars Tobey McGuire, Kirsten Dunst, and features Doc Ock as the villain. |
Definitely. The original had a lot of heart (even if it did play on 9/11 emotions way too much) and humor, and was the best superhero movie ever made--with the exception of Unbreakable. (As a side note, a relatively-distant relative of my fiancee will be playing Doc Ock's wife.)
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Alien vs. Predator
Combination of popular movie franchises Alien and Predator.
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Ummm... no. Destined to be utter crap.
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The Village
M. Night Shyamalan's new movie with Joquin Phoenix, about a Pennsylvania town of 60 surrounded by mythical people.
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M. Night hasn't steered me wrong yet. Loved Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs--all movies that Hollywood plays up as big-concept sci-fi/fantasy type films, but in reality all very intimate films about family and faith.
quote:
Shrek 2
Sequel to Mike Meyer's 2002 "Shrek". Animated feature about a storybook ogre.
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The original was the best animated film ever. I am extremely nervous about a sequel... seems more likely that they'd screw up a good thing than manage to pull it off again.
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Jersey Girl
Kevin Smith's new picture staring Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler about a man who must adapt to new wife and 6-year-old daughter. Also with Jennifer Lopez.
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Kevin Smith: good. Bennifer: ummm... not no much.
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Troy
Blockbuster based on The Illiad, staring heavyweights Brad Pitt, Orlando Bloom, Eric Bana, and Brian Cox, directed by Wolfgang Peterson (Das Boot).
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Heavyweights? Being a little generous, aren't we, Emperor? Brad Pitt is a fine actor, but... anyway, I am a sucker for historical epics, so count me in.
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Kill Bill Vol. 2
Really the second part of one movie, the continuation of Kill Bill Vol. 1, this time with Samuel L. Jackson added to the mix. |
Missed Vol. 1, really wanted to see it. Seems likely it'll be re-released in conjuction with Vol. 2, so I'll be all over this one. Quentin Tarantino, plus Uma Thurman, plus Sam Jackson? Yahtzee!
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The Incredibles
Animated feature by Pixar about a middle-aged Super Hero, voiced by Coach Craig T. Nelson.
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Pixar can do no wrong, and the premise sounds very promising. This ought to be a mortal lock.
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Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
This movie is what you get when you combine Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Elijah Wood, Kirten Dunst, Tom Wilkinson, director Michel Gondry, and screenwriter Charlie Kaufman (Being John Malkovich, Adaptation). |
Quite a title, too. Interesting cast, great writer... I'm willing to give this the benefit of the doubt.
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The Ladykillers
A new Coen Brother's picture, starring Tom Hanks who plays a Mark Twain-southern drawl-type leading a gang of hoodlums in a large crime.
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You had me at "Coen".
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The Passion of Christ
Mel Gibson's picture of the last 2 hours of J. H. C.'s life. In Aramaic and Latin, possibly with subtitles.
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Not being a believer myself, I'm not really inclined to see this; however, may do so just for controversy's sake.
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Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkabann
Based on the 3rd Harry Potter novel. |
I'm all over this like a Republican on a tax cut. My favorite book of the series; plus, there was a definite improvement in the second movie over the first. One can only hope that continues with the new director.
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Garfield
Live action adaptation of the world-wide comic star cat.
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Not only no, but hell no.
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Club Dread
New Broken Lizard movie, the guys who wrote, directed, and starred in 2002's "Super Troopers".
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Super Troopers was amusing, if a little too juvenile in parts. I'd have to hear more about this before making a decision.
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The Punisher
Adaptation of the comic book of the same name.
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See A vs. P. This has "Daredevil" written all over it.
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The Day After Tomorrow
Huge multi-million dollar movie by the creators of Independence Day. The world is attacked not by aliens, but by the weather, like a second Great Deluge of biblical proportions.
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Like Independence Day, it sounds entirely too goofy for it not to be enjoyable in some deep, dark, secret, reptilian-brain kinda way. My fiancee is a sucker for natural disaster stuff, so I'm sure I'll be seeing this one regardless.
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J. M. Barrie's Neverland
Based on Barrie (played by Johnny Depp), the writer of Peter Pan. |
Can't go wrong with Johnny Depp, quite possibly the best American actor alive today.
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The Spongebob Squarepants Movie
Hero of Nickelodeon's animated TV Series. |
I love the little goober as much as the next guy, but a movie will be all-but-intolerable to everyone but the under-10 set.
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Alexander
Another Greek-era movie, this one based on Alexander the Great, starring Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, and Val Kilmer, and directed by master Oliver Stone. |
As I said, a sucker for the historical epic. This cast seems more impressive to me than "Troy". Definitely on my hit list.
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The Aviator
Biopic of Howard Hughes, starring Alec Baldwin, Cate Blanchett and Leo D. |
Alec Baldwin has been reborn by "The Cooler"; Cate Blanchett is amazing in anything she does; Leo DiCaprio makes me want to punch his lights out whenever I see him. Probably won't be seeing this, for the sake of my blood pressure alone.
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Rocky VI
The legendary boxer is lured out of retirement for one last fight (we hope.) |
The only way I'll see this is if a meteorite crashes into the set, annihilating everyone who thought this would be a good idea.
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The Brothers Grimm
Dark fantasy by Terry Gilliam about the famous fable writers. |
Terry Gilliam has the most distinctive voice of any director working today. This ought to be a load of creepy fun.
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Osama
Based on a true story, a woman hides her daughter as a boy named Osama, attempting to give her a decent life while fearing the Taliban. |
Hadn't heard of this one... provided you aren't making this up, this one has "bomb" written all over it, if only because of the title. Sounds interesting.
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Others that come out are The Phantom of the Opera, Collateral (Tom Cruise), Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman), comic book adaptations Blade: Trinity, Ghost Rider, Catwoman, Hellboy and Constantine, sequels to Ocean's 11, The Mask, Resident Evil, Mission Impossible, Dirty Dancing, Starship Troopers, Dude Where's My Car?, and XXX, adaptations of The Polar Express, The A-Team, Alone in the Dark, and Starsky & Hutch, plus a host more. |
Maybe, maybe, likely, hell no, no, maybe, no, maybe, absolutely, sweet merciful crap no, **** no, likely, christ no, hell no, **** you, and you too, nyet, negatory, no way, and **** off.
And that about sums it up.
The worst part of 2004 is no new LOTR movie. I must say, after seeing the first film in the theatre, dragged there by a friend, I wasn't overly impressed. A good movie, sure, but I wasn't blown away. But starting with the extended cut of Fellowship, I have never seen any cinematic trilogy like that. I suspect I'll be watching these movies the rest of my life. I can't imagine a trilogy that could measure up to this new standard.
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Guynemer
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...rat bastard...
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Boris Godunov
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Portland, OR
Aug 2001
time: 00:33
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Spider-Man 2
Nope.
Alien vs. Predator
Good lord, no.
The Village
No. I found Signs barely tolerable, and his formula has gotten old.
Shrek 2
Nope. Guess I was one of the few who found the first one unimaginative and boring.
Jersey Girl
No way in hell.
Troy
Yes. Peterson's name alone is enough to make me want to see this.
Kill Bill Vol. 2
Meh, possibly. I should see how it ends, though I wasn't that impressed with the first part.
The Incredibles
Will wait for the DVD. Looks funny, though...and Finding Nemo was pretty good.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Nope. No interest.
The Ladykillers
While I am a fan of the Coen brothers, I usually wait for the rental.
The Passion of Christ
Couldn't pay me.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkabann
Couldn't pay me more.
Garfield
What?
Club Dread
DVD. Super Troopers was kinda funny, but not worth movie theater prices.
The Punisher
Too much punishment for me, so nope.
The Day After Tomorrow
Maybe. This could really suck, but it could be fun. Will wait and see the critic consensus
J. M. Barrie's Neverland
Yes. Depp alone is worth it. 
The Spongebob Squarepants Movie
Make the pain stop.
Alexander
Miss Colin Ferrel making out with Jared Leto? Not a chance!
The Aviator
Pass.
Rocky VI
Holy crap. Does this one take place in a nursing home? No way.
The Brothers Grimm
Number #1 on my list. Gilliam's genius is one of the few things that can get me excited about an upcoming film.
Osama
Bo-ring!
The Phantom of the Opera
If it's the musical, I'd rather drive 8-inch railroad spikes into my skull. If not...still not interested. It's a cheesy story.
The rest looks like steaming piles of crappity-crap.
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cinch
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Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Jul 2002
time: 22:33
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What? No Sky Captain And The World Of Tomorrow ? Heresy!
Watch The Trailer HERE
As for which ones I want to see:
ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND: I loves me the Carrey, especially when he's playing it half-n-half. I also loves me the Kaufman, when done right... I hope he's done right here.
TROY & ALEXANDER: Duh.
JERSEY GIRL: My Kevin Smith fanboyhood has been waning, but I still think this shows promise. Flecky has the chops, he just needs the right environment to bring them out.
THE BROTHERS GRIMM & THE LADYKILLERS. I am loyal to the directors.
THE INCREDIBLES. I will see anything Pixar. SHREK had funny moments, but curse he who says that it is better than any Pixar movie!
THE PASSION. I will see it; it intrigues me. Plus, I want to, you know, actually SEE the film before I judge whether it's evil or not.
And of course KILL BILL VOL. 2.
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12-01-2004 21:45
Day After Tomorrow
Rocky VI, Garfield
Me too! 
), Alexander, Shrek 2.
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