 |
| |
|
|
Kassiopeia
|
 |
Jyväskylä, Finland
Jul 2001
time: 07:36
|
|
Mafia 21: The Corporate Mafia
or: Laissez-Faire Gone Horribly Wrong
Prologue
"The time is almost five o'clock, Mister President, you have an appointment at five thirty." No response. The President's secretary, Hercules, knocked the door, still no response. He opened the door and smiled - the President was dozing off, his pointy hair squished by the books and the computer on his table. Hercules reached for the switch and lit the room - only to witness a horrible sight.
"Help! Security! President Kassiopeia has been killed!" Hercules screamed.
"What is it? What's the matter?" the CEO Duke o' York said as he and his secretary :) Smiley rushed in from the nearby office.
"The President has been murdered", the shaken Hercules said as he mashed the buttons of the intercom. :) Smiley helped him out, while Duke walked into the room.
Kassiopeia's head rested in a massive pool of blood on the table. The screen of the computer monitor cast a pale green hue on his head - or was it his death that had coloured him so? His face had frozen in an expression of shock and pain, his mouth gagged by his own tie. His scalp and face were covered in staples, and pencils were lodged in his ears. The CEO had a sudden urge to vomit right there and then.
"Oh my god", expressed someone behind him. Duke turned around to see two security guards, Nuclear Master and Vovan. "We must call the police", Vovan said.
"I already tried. The lines are dead. I also asked alva from Human Resources downstairs to get to a pay phone, but none of the doors would accept anyone's pass code", said Hercules.
Nuclear Master looked at the computer screen. "It's the program the President wanted for his desktop. He could control all the computer systems in the building through here. The killer must be behind the lockdown. Only the President knew the password, the killer must have squeezed it out of him."
"Can't we use cellulars?" Vovan asked.
"Cellulars are forbidden. Company policy", Hercules reminded him. "Even if someone had one stashed here somewhere, the President has had some sort of scramblers installed, scramblers controlled through that computer there. Paranoid he was, indeed, but I really can't wonder why."
"Thank goodness for that", the CEO said, "the hit on the stock price would have been huge right now." At least before PR could spin the news, he continued in his thoughts. "We can sort this out on our own since the building is sealed off. Vovan, Nuclear Master, let no one in to the President's room unless I want in."
"Since nobody can get in or out, I'll call the Human Resources Manager. Rah can email us through the company network a list of employees who should be present", :) Smiley said. "It's only twenty or so people with the vacations and all."
"And I can use the public announcement system in my office to call together all the employees to sort this out. Good thing we have that, this is a big skyscraper we're in after all. Let's get that list, then. Vacations... I was going to go to mine with the Mrs. today. She's going to love this..." Duke sighed.
"The list is here. Twenty-five people, minus the late President:
code:
mafia
| Name
|
Position
|
Status
|
| 1. Hercules
|
Secretary of the President
|
Present
|
| 2. Duke o' york
|
Chief Executive Officer |
Present |
| 3. :) Smiley
|
Secretary of the CEO
|
Present |
| 4. Kalius
|
Chief Financial Officer |
Present |
| 5. Theben
|
Accountant
|
Present |
| 6. Jonny
|
Accountant
|
Present |
| 7. DrSpike
|
Chief Information Officer
|
Present |
| 8. Jon Miller
|
Helpdesk
|
Present |
| 9. Skanky Burns
|
Chief Technical Officer
|
Present |
| 10. Adagio
|
IT Specialist
|
Present |
| 11. Method
|
IT Specialist
|
Present |
| 12. SnowFire
|
IT Specialist |
Present |
| 13. rah
|
Human Resources Manager
|
Present |
| 14. gjramsey
|
Assistant HR Manager
|
Present |
| 15. alva
|
Chief Recruiter |
Present |
| 16. Imran Siddiqui
|
Chief of Public Relations
|
Present |
| 17. Ljube-ljcvetko
|
PR Consultant |
Present |
| 18. Guynemer
|
Company Doctor |
Present |
| 19. Tuberski
|
Company Nurse
|
Present |
| 20. Zopperoni
|
Chief of Marketing |
Present |
| 21. Spaced Cowboy
|
Marketing Advisor |
Present |
| 22. DarkCloud
|
Statistical Analyst
|
Present |
| 23. Nuclear Master
|
Security Guard
|
Present |
| 24. Vovan
|
Security Guard
|
Present |
"Alright, well done. I'll use the PA and tell everyone to gather at the cafeteria on the fourth floor", the CEO concluded. "Except you two", he said and pointed at the security guards. "I'll call you on the intercom when we're all down there... if the count is 22, there's no one to keep from getting to that room." The guards nodded.
Chapter One
The people from the Marketing Department were first in the cafeteria after the CEO had arrived. Duke explained the situation to them.
"That's awful", Spaced Cowboy said. "Horrible for sales. Anything with 'Apolyton Corp' on it will be tainted for weeks."
"I realise your concern, that's why we'll be sorting this out on our own. We'll figure that out once everyone's here."
"How many of us are here, trapped inside?" Zopperoni asked.
:) Smiley showed him a printout of the list.
"Oh good god no, not the nerds", Zopperoni exclaimed.
The CEO and the secretaries looked at him, puzzled.
"That's because you never have to deal with those... things", Zopperoni scoffed. "This place doesn't even have proper showers. Not that the nerds go to one anyway... and still they ramble on about knowing where their towels are. Socially utterly inept creatures, disgusting. Spend all their days scamming on some bullet board or something, shooting up smack and god knows what."
"Geeks, we're geeks", came a protest from the door. "We play SMAC, and it's spamming."
The three "IT specialists" behind Skanky Burns, the chief technical officer, were as if woken up from a coma. "Spam? Where! Pitchforks, torches, now!"
"No, not the email variety", Skanky reigned in his cohorts. He glanced back at Zopperoni. "The bulletin board variety."
Method sighed in relief and then looked at Duke. "Hey, you're the CEO aren't you? I was just owning these losers as Santiago in our LAN match, what's so important to drag us up here?"
"Indeed. At least you've had the courtesy to close the curtains", SnowFire added. "The big bright one hasn't set yet..." He shuddered.
"President Kassiopeia has been murdered, cruelly and brutally. We know it's someone inside, and there's 24 of us. We have to find out who it is", Hercules said.
"Let's just call the police then", Skanky suggested, "no need to involve us."
"We can't get out, and the murderer has also cut the phone lines. We need to get the pass code from the murderer to -"
The fact of the matter hit the IT crew. "The phonelines are down?" SnowFire asked, shocked. "Whoever's behind this deed must suffer! No man shall stand between a geek and his warez and pr0n!"
Spaced Cowboy was about to ask what this "pr-zero-n" was, but followed his better judgement.
The staff flowed in, and after a few more minutes 22 people were present. The security guards, called by Duke, arrived short after.
After thirty minutes of debate and several pots of black coffee, it was agreed that the only fair way would be to examine the situation carefully and vote on a ballot, one vote per worker, who the remaining staff thought the killer was. DarkCloud was more than willing to take up the task of arranging the ballot and counting it.
On that very moment, :) Smiley started to shake violently, grabbing his throat. He collapsed on the floor and before Doctor Guynemer could do anything, he was dead. "He didn't have epilepsy", Guynemer said, and examined the body more closely. "It was probably poison. Respiratory inhibition... cyanide, I'd say."
"Now there are two victims", Duke o' york said and looked at his dead secretary sorrowfully. "Time to have the vote before there's a third one."
|
|
| |
|
| |
All times are GMT. The time now is 05:36.
Apolyton Time is 00:36. |
top of page
|
|
|
Forum Rules:
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
|
HTML code is ON
vB code is ON
Smilies are ON
[IMG] code is ON
|
|
|
|
|
|
23-06-2004 03:33
Attachment: 
very amusing 
Smiley?
|
