15-10-2004 13:15									#61
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My sympathies Tia.

	15-10-2004 13:33									#62
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quote: Originally posted by Tiamat What you can do for me is post good jokes not to dirty just one or two of those (he does like a good dirty joke ) but mainly ones that we can tell in mixed company. He loves jokes so the more I can tell the more he will laugh. Happiness is my main goal for him right now.

A man is walking down the street with a live lobster in his hand. He runs into a friend who asks, "Where're you going with that live lobster?"

"I'm taking it home for dinner."

"Wait a minute!" says the lobster, "I've already had dinner. Take me to a movie."

***
A man is on a psychiatrist's couch complaining, "I don't get it, Doc. Everwhere I go, people ignore me. It's like I'm not even there. What can I do?"

The psychiatrist says, "Next!"

***

You have my permission to re-write this one, which I wrote myself. About a million years ago, when I was an undergrad, there was an ad in our student placement center by comedienne Phyllis Diller, who was looking for a joke writer. The next day, the ad was replaced by a note of apology, saying Ms. Diller's plans had changed and so she'd not be hiring anyone. But by then, I'd already come up with the following:

Fang's not speaking to me. Y'see, his mother's coming to visit, and I suggested she stay in the garage. --But I wasn't trying to be inhospitable! It's just the only room in the house with a door big enough for her to fit through!

	15-10-2004 15:55									#63
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Tia, I lost my mother when she was in her fifites. I truly know how you feel, and all my blest wishes for you and your family.

Please, if it's not too late, make sure everyone knows his wishes. Too often loved ones cannot let go, but depending on how far it gets, due to either quality of life or actual brain damage, the person involved realizees it is time to move on. My mother had metasized cancer in her liver, held on till I got home and then did three day later. They had offered her two more months of life with agressive chemo, but she made her decision that wasn't "life" as she saw it - chemo was hideously painful then - and it was time to move on. I haven't thought about this in years, may God bless you and your family.

	15-10-2004 17:07									#64
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My Sympathies Tiamat

Hereīs another joke

quote: Three men are before the Gates of Heaven. Petrus tells them: "O.K., you can do what you want in Heaven, as long as you donīt step onto a Chicken. If you do you will get chained to a very ugly women for the Rest of your Life." The enter through the gates and see, that it might be very difficult to not step onto a chicken, as there are chicken everywhere. After maybe 6 Hours the first of the men steps onto a Chicken. At once Petrus appears with a really ugly woman and Handcuffs and chains him to the woman. The days pass and after 2 weeks the second man gets chained to an ulgy woman. After four weeks the three men meet again, and see that the third men is chained to Claudia Schiffer. So they ask him how this could happen. Then Claudia Schiffer says: "I stepped onto a chicken"

quote: A doctor, a lawyer and a Programmer were discussing the relative merits of having a wife or a mistress. The lawyer says: "For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce, it causes all sorts of legal problems." The doctor says: "It's better to have a wife because the sense of security lowers your stress and is good for your health." The Programmer says: "You're both wrong. It's best to have both so that when the wife thinks you're with the mistress and the mistress thinks you're with your wife, you can do some Programming."

quote: Two Programmers meet. One of them has a Frog in his pocket who always yells: "Kiss me, kiss me. If you do it I will turn into a beautiful Princess and will love you forever" So the other one asks why he hasnīt kissed the frog yet. And the Programmer with the Frog in the Pocket answers: "Look, I donīt have the money or time for a girlfriend. But a speaking Frog is really cool."

	15-10-2004 17:23									#65
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Thanks for the jokes We have come to realize that last week he was bleeding and lost alot of blood. We didn't even think of this until I saw Diss's articles (thanks they were very helpfull). He had been passing blood in his urine and apparently it was quite alot. Any other articles you guys can find would be great. Did read all of them this morning trying to get on to the hospital.

It's very sureal to see the strongest person you've ever known in your life leaving before your eyes. Keep the thoughts and we will check in tonight. Honestly I don't think it's going to be much longer but while there's breath I will make sure there is lots of love and lots and lots of laughter.

	15-10-2004 17:34									#66
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Take care Tia.

	15-10-2004 19:56									#67
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I lost my father when he died from a stroke eight years ago.


Be strong Tia, but also, don't bottle up your feelings.

	15-10-2004 22:11									#68
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By the way - you're doing the most important thing, being there for him to surround him with love in his final moments. To gently drift off in the arms of his loved ones... (don't let the hospital staff chase you out - bring him home if you have to do, the nurse/cost are worth it, trust me please on this if it is a factor.)

	16-10-2004 01:56									#69
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Don't know what to say...

Keep strong Tia.

	16-10-2004 06:11									#70
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He, you and his loved ones are in my thoughts.

Here's a joke. Forgive me if it's too dirty - my mind is permanmently in the gutters.

Three young men who are best friends went on a skiing trip together to Lake Tahoe. They had this cabin but it had only one king-sized bed. Since they all basically considered themselves brothers, they figured why not share the bed.

In the morning, the guy who slept on the left side said "Wow, I sure had a such hot and steamy dream last night, it actually felt real!" The guy who slept on the right side said "Hey, man! Me too!"

The guy who slept in the middle said "Really? All I dreamt was all about skiing."

	16-10-2004 08:20									#71
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Bless you, Tia.

	17-10-2004 02:59									#72
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You're in my thoughts as well now. Be strong.

	17-10-2004 04:10									#73
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Tiamat,

I hope when I'm on my death bed, there is somebody like you around to make the passing easier...

Stay Strong!

	17-10-2004 05:19									#74
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Best wishes to you and to your family, Tia.

As Ming said, I hope that in my final days I'll have someone like you around...

	18-10-2004 04:22									#75
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Good luck, Tia.

	18-10-2004 07:55									#76
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**walks back into apolyton** Ahhhhhh.....good to be home. And Theben Love the avatar!

Ok so here's where we are at for the last two days may I say that the level of incompentency at this hospital has risen to a knew high. I've been to tired these days to tell all that is going on but they had continually given him the wrong diet ie: he's a diabetic and they give him sugar etc....his potassium was horrible they gave him orange juice which of course we gave him not knowing about the potassium. I mean the food they were giving him could have put him into a diabetic coma. He lost control of his bowels at one point and the nurse that came in to clean him up used (and all you boys will appreciate this one) dry wash cloths and just rubbed him raw on top of the fact that he has a cathetar. He was in such pain. Needless to say the exorcist woman came out and my head spun around 12 times and by the time I was through showing all my documention to the patient services reprsentative and yelling at her for an hour I told her who his nurses were to be and that they had better pull their head out of their asses or this red head was gonna get real ugly real quick. The dietician also came up and personally apologiezed to us. See he has to be on a Renal dieat for renal failure as well as diabetic and low salt. And I didn't know that there were certain fruits to go along with that that he couldn't have and here we were feeding them to him because it was on the tray.

So yeah we'll go from yesterday...by know Steve has arrived which pleased father to no end. They are two peas in a pod both love flying and football. I also during the course of all this have found out interesting things about my dad. I always knew he was drafted by a pro football team I just wasn't aware that it was the Philidelphia Egales! How cool is that!

Ok so yesterday morning they come in at 10 and say we need to give you a blood transfusion. So we think ok it will be soon. They don't come in until 1 to change the needle gauge. You can imagine his anxiety waiting for the transfussion to start along with the fact that he has slight demensia so he gets confused a bit. Are you ready for this......they don't start the transfusion until 7:45 that night. When you transfuse blood you have to take blood pressure every thirty minutes. They had to give him two bags of blood and weren't through until about 2 in the morning. How much sleep do you think he got. Also when you give blood there is the possiblity of fluid building up on the lungs and heart. He has already had a triple bypass so this is a bit dangerous. Half way through his breathing gets raspy and very laborus. We let the nurse know and she slows the drip so that it won't effect him so much. About 45 minutes after that he needs to poo. You have to understand my fathers extreeeeeeeeeeeeem sense of humor. He informs Janet(step mother) and me that........I AM ABOUT TO RELEASE THE STINK!!!!! It was just to funny! Anyway they come into to assist him and then the charge nurse says well this line is to slow and trys to increase it. I went balistic and told her that Tina decreased it and that is the only person I want messing with it. She walked out of the room and made a smart ass comment where I heard it. I calmly excused myself went to the nurses station and informed her not to politely about her professionalism and that if she had a problem with me I would be happy to meet her outside but that if I even so much as saw her anywhere near my father again that she and I were going to have a big problem.

The next day after the trasfussion which was yesterday at 3 pm they decided to get an xray to check for pneumona. We went to lunch and came back, I came and said well hello sweetie pie how are you he comes back with I have pneumona....... OMG one more thing to deal with. When my step brother (the attorney)got there at 10 that night no one had talked to us no one had started anti biotics and we both just freeked out. There response was well the doctor has to read it and he has 24 hours to read it. To which we responded so the thing is he's 81 bed ridden with pneumona and so you going to wait until tomorrow to get him started. Makes perfect sense to us. Long story short my husband and I were speaking with the supervisor at 1 in the morning trying desperately just to get some type of confirmation or if he had just imagined it. Well we have to wait until tomorrow.

When the doctor go here this morning he through a huge fit how long does it take the radiologist to read this....he was pissed that was at 10 this mornin. We finally found at at 1:30 this afternoon.....NO!! he didn't have pneumona. Apparently when he broke his ribs a few years back this causes some type of swelling in the lungs. But can you imagine the hell we went through yesterday thinking he had that and now what do we do? He even at one point asked my "why did god give me pnemona?" I told him daddy, god doesn't give you anything you can't handle and this is a little test and we are going to pass it with no problem and it's not open for discussion (his favorite saying for me) and I told him I was boss for the day and he had to believe what I said. At that point he demanded a recount!

Needless to say I will be having a chat with the hospital admistration tomorrow. We went through a living hell yesterday worrying. And didn't realize how bad he was worrying about it until today. He had mentioned several things about it but when we got the all clear on that he I noticed that he really started resting. You know taking his naps he wasn't fittful and restless and he would sleep instead of waking up every few minutes. You don't really think of how anxiety effects patients but it does. So he slept off and on today and he and I watched the cowboys play ball and ate ham sandwiches in his bed together. We used to love to watch football together and he always used to take me to games. So we just watched games today in between naps. We just left him a few minutes ago and for possibly for the first time in a week and a half I may be able to sleep instead of sitting up all night in his favorite chair crying. He's still in renal failure but thank god he doesn't have pneumona.

Any way I told him the frog joke and he laughed and told me on.

This platinum blonde walks into the appraisal office and says she was to get information. The guy behind the counter asked what type of information she needed and she said well....I want to know if I"m a precious mineral or just a common whore.

Very tired now and will go to bed. It's a minute by minute day by day adventure but it will be filled with laughter if that's all I can do then I will feel lucky. I lost my mother 25 years ago and feel very blessed that I have the time, the nursing knowledge and the opportunity to be of service to this wonderful great man.

Update tomorrow. Keep those good thoughts.

	18-10-2004 08:22									#77
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Thanks for the update. He's very lucky to have you as a daughter. Keep up the good work.

Sorry to hear about the quality of the hospital. The system is getting very slow and beurocratic. It's in desperate need of overhauling.

Too bad the Cowboys lost though . Hope he wasn't too upset by that.

	18-10-2004 08:49									#78
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appreciate the update, Tia

	18-10-2004 10:09									#79
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Good luck with the hospital crap...I've just about had it with those idiots myself. My mom had metastisized breast cancer that was in her back and the doctor sent her to a chiropractor for three months...no tests, pictures, nothing. Thank god the chiro threw in the towel.

Now's the time to ask him all those questions and what his "message" is to those left behind. It's nice you can be there with him for his spiritual needs. Just love him and hold his hand and soak it all in. It must be a really terrifying thing to be in his position.
I used to read to my dad when he was in IR. Probably helped me more than him...but you never know?

Hang in there...thoughts and prayers to you and yours.

	18-10-2004 16:57									#80
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Thanks and I remember you had said that and have started reading to him. We have had many nice talks remembering my mom, things about his life. He told me yesterday that he was very fortunate to have had the life he has that he lived the way he wanted and die the way he wanted and I asked him how that was and he said very reluctantly. He hasn't given up the fight nor will I while he still breathes.

Every day I count as a day to tell him how much I love him and what a good father he was to me and how I will honor him and live my life with the dignity and integrity he has lived his. He's never been a PDA person but he's been making sure he lets me know how much he loves me and I him. I'm just praying for a corner to turn and a little more time. Could be selfish on my part but I just need more time with him.

Off to the hospital. I'm just going to believe that today is going to be a good day.

	18-10-2004 23:32									#81
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Joke:

There was a man who decided to buy a pig farm and raise pigs. He went to the local market and bought several pigs. He piled them into his truck and took them home. When he got home he proudly showed his pigs off to the neighbors. One neighbor pulls him aside and says, "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, buddy, but you've got all female pigs. You'll have to get some males if you want to keep your farm."

Obviously distraught and unable to afford any more pigs, he asked, "Well, can I mate my pigs with yours or someone else's nearby?"

"Sure, I guess we can do that until you get a respectable number of pigs. I'll take half of the babies and you can take half," the neighbor replies.

"Alright. How will I know if my pigs are pregnant?" asked the new farmer.

"Well, in the morning, they'll be grazing in the grass," replied the neighbor.

The next morning, the new farmer piles his pigs into his truck and drives to his neighbors farm. They leave the pigs together and let nature take its course. At the end of the day, the new farmer gathers up his pigs and takes them home. This continues for a week or so with each morning the new farmer rushing to the window hoping to see his pigs grazing in the grass, to no avail. Then one morning, he looks out his window and can't see his pigs. He asks his son, "Where are the pigs? Are they grazing in the grass?"

His son replies, "No, they all climbed into the truck and one's in front blowing the horn!"

I wish you well.

	18-10-2004 23:34									#82
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Hope you get your wish.

Good luck.

	18-10-2004 23:57									#83
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Haven't visited this thread until now.

Take care Tiamat, and best wishes for your dad.

	19-10-2004 21:24									#84
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Love and prayers from Dallas, Tiamat.

	20-10-2004 04:13									#85
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thanks for the update, Tia. Hope everything goes well.

	20-10-2004 17:38									#86
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**walks in and does the dance of joy**

All be it probably a bit premature but...I'll take it. His levels still aren't dropping like they should however they have now moved him to a rehabilitation hospital which means he is out of that hell hole he was in. I think they just got tired of my bit*hing at the incompetence. And yesterday all the managers were trying to find out what was wrong etc.. and I finally said look he's getting out of here today funny how now you want to know what you did wrong


He has not been able to walk or move around. The doctors still aren't telling us what we want to hear but that's ok to. If it's a question of just making him well enough to pass at home.....well if I had my choice on how to go it would be with my things, friends and family around me. I think it's just better that way. Reality is that this seems to be what is happening. It's really a no brainer if you are in kidney failure and you only have one kidney.....well there aren't alot of options. Yes they could do dialysis but then it becomes a question of the quality of his life opposed to the quantity. His doctor has not been in any hurry to do it either. He even said normally he when his level hit 8.2 he would have done it but I think he's also being a realist as well.

His spirits are up and he keeps talking about Steve (husband) taking him fishing so he's not given up as far as I can tell except when we have the "now when I die" talks.....which I can't handle and usually change the subject.

I have also learned a new phrase. In one of his stories he was telling he was talking about riding on the back of someones motorcycle when he was young and said that the got the pee waddeling squeek scared out of him. Funniest thing I'd ever heard.

I've learned so much about my dad over the course of the last week and a half. There aren't to many people in this world when they introduce you to one of their friends that can say we've been friends for 70 years. That's happened more times then I can count this last week. Speaks volumes to me about the type of man my father was... is.

It's funny how you can live with and be around someone for 44 years and not really know them. One good thing that has come out of this is he's actually gotten to see me use my nursing knowledge and experience and has now said that he expects me to be in college in January to complete my training and has said just get in school and I'll pay for it.

If I can say anything to anyone on this board.....if you have family you've had problems with or someone you hold a grudge against.....make a mends. Do it know before you never have the chance. It's so important whether you think so or not. Don't let time pass you by and keep a cold heart. Life is way to precious and way to short. Tell the people in your life every day at least once a day that you love them and appreciate them because we never really know do we? We could pull out of our driveway and get hit and then it's over. And they would never know how you feel. Don't waste a chance to tell someone, don't waste time being petty or holding a grudge becuase in the end it just doesn't matter...it just doesn't. Make time.

	20-10-2004 19:00									#87
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thanks for the update

	21-10-2004 05:47									#88
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this sounds like good news. Or at least better news. I'm glad to hear it. Keep it up.

	21-10-2004 07:07									#89
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And we do the one step forward five steps back dance.

So he moved to the rehab hospital which is working with him to get him up and mobile again but while he was doing his arm stregthening today Janet and I noticed that he was turning yellow. We also noticed this in the hospital. When he went back to the room I told his nurse what I noticed that he was jaundiced. She said well honey....he is in renal failure and he will continue to get yellow but it will eventually stay and not fade but we do blood work every day and check his levels. So I asked her.....so it's basically a race to see which is going to give out first the liver or the kidney. She didn't want to answer me but when she finally did she said yes it is but we have many patients that live with this a long time.

Today the doctor said he is a very sick man. This is the first time it's ever been said. Most of the time they just skirt the issue. Anyway he was extremly active today and walked all over the PT room which is encouraging. Janet said you father has a tremendous will and if anyone can rally from this it's him. My goal at this point is to get him well enough to come home and go fishing one last time with Steve. When my time comes I would prefer to be in my home with my things and my family.

All I can post today way to tired and worn down. And thanks to whom ever corrected the spelling in the thread title. Don't want to get another dressing down by St. Leo for my horendous spelling.

	21-10-2004 07:14									#90
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hmm, yeah the yellow doesn't seem good. It's good he's in in good spirits though. It's good you are spending so much time with him. It will definately help keep his spirits up. And that is very important.