15-06-2005 20:23									#31
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quote: I wonder space with these women that you get as "friends"-- have you ever put yourself out there and made a real with no ambiguity romantic style move or gesture ??

Probably not. Ive had two girlfriends in the past. The first one was really shy and I was really shy, that just doesnt work. We just stopped seeing each other after a week of nothing really.

The second was my first love (stupid whore), she liked how I was shy, and she liked that I was a nice guy. We were friends before anything else. I believe this is why Im accidently being a friend, it's worked for me before.

I never even pursued anyone else in Barrow because I had no desire for any of them. New Mexico is another story.

	15-06-2005 20:25									#32
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Another problem I have is that I am really confident when Im just flirting. I also have no problem with asking girls out on dates. But when it progresses any further Im like a toddler learning to walk.

	15-06-2005 20:25									#33
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quote: Originally posted by chegitz guevara The thing is, you have to accept that you're going to get shot down a few times. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Yup-- but he will likely get shot down much less than he expects. ( assuming you make sure they are single and are realistic in your targets-- If you are preppy, you probably won't get the girl that is always dating the goths . . . if she only ever dates guys with hot cars etc etc)

I think girls want to meet a decent guy and if you seem confident and are polite, most girls will give you the benefit of the doubt and go out with you

	15-06-2005 20:27									#34
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quote: Thats unfortunate. I have succeeded at both. Its not easy but it can happen

Right but its not a good strategy to rely on. If your answer to the question: "what are you doing to try to stop being single?" is "well there's this really good friend I have and I think we'd make a great couple, but she doesn't know that I think that about her" then you're in for a world of frustration and, in the vast majority of cases, no sex.

quote: I shall implement plan Che tomorrow. If it fails and she just wants to be friends then at least I'll have someone I can confide in.

Good, get it the hell over with ASAP.

quote: I have a decent sized stock to choose from still.

If you're single always always keep that in mind.

quote: I had to pretend to be a major jerk at one resteraunt where I worked. It was the theme.

Whaaaaaa? Do tell.

	15-06-2005 20:28									#35
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quote: Originally posted by Space05us Another problem I have is that I am really confident when Im just flirting.

That'll get you in trouble.

	15-06-2005 20:28									#36
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quote: Originally posted by Bosh Whaaaaaa? Do tell.

Dick's Last Resort.

	15-06-2005 20:33									#37
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quote: Originally posted by Space05us Another problem I have is that I am really confident when Im just flirting. I also have no problem with asking girls out on dates. But when it progresses any further Im like a toddler learning to walk.

So you get dates but have difficulty making the physical moves? Assuming you desire is there and you are really a good flirt . .. continue the flirting on the date.

If she goes along with it and you get get into a playful banter, you can even even try a challenging "what would you say if I kissed you right now?"-- I can tell you that question puts it right out there and you will know where you stand-- I've done it and it was always followed by a kiss-- why ? Because I observed my dates closely. Some dates ended with no attempt at all on my part-- I could read the signs and frankly I had no interest in pursuing someone if they didn't show an attraction to me. That's part of confidence too . . it doesn't matter that one date doesn't work great as another one will be coming along shortly

	15-06-2005 21:36									#38
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Check your pms space.

	15-06-2005 23:06									#39
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Ok more discussion on this girl in particular. She is fairly uneducated and hangs out with the cute little cholo ****ers. She has had 5 boyfriends and dumped all of them for being *******s, they were all cholos as well. She told me the other night that I am the first white person she has ever been friends with.

I am incredibly intellegent, not trying to toot my own horn or anything . Im in no manner a gangster, and have had only 2 girlfriends. Im white!


How can I bend this to my favor? Provided Operation Che goes as planned.


side note: I hate waiting for the afternoon to pass so I can go to work. Its terribly boring.

	15-06-2005 23:20									#40
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I don't see any advantage on the race thing unless you thought she had a preference ( and in this case it seems against you). While I think women like intelligence when a guy can use it to be funny witty etc I don't think education helps you that much. I never knew a girl that liked a guy for his ability to do physics.

I think for her it will come down to

1. am I attracted to him??
2. Do I have fun??

	15-06-2005 23:53									#41
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spacy i think you are plotting too much, just let things happen

	15-06-2005 23:55									#42
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quote: Originally posted by Illur spacy i think you are plotting too much, just let things happen

quote: side note: I hate waiting for the afternoon to pass so I can go to work. Its terribly boring.

Good to see you joined 'Poly

	15-06-2005 23:58									#43
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couldn't resist
a whole new forum to twist and bend

	16-06-2005 00:45									#44
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The four worst words in the English language (to a guy):

"Let's just be friends"



Maybe you're a dweeb.

Maybe the girl is just a game player.

Maybe you're missing out on non-verbal cues that you never had a chance, or you did, but you blew it.

Maybe maybe maybe...

There's a zillion possible explanations, but it's not about what you want, it's about what she wants and what you get (or not, as the case may be).

You have to figure out what's going on in her mind (any "her"), not just that the one-eyed sailor's at attention on deck and wants a little shore leave.

	16-06-2005 00:47									#45
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NO! NO!
**** figuring out things
girls are as lost as you guys
in the end it's about chemstry and luck

	16-06-2005 00:49									#46
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stop over-analyzing things spacy

	16-06-2005 00:50									#47
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Good advice.

	16-06-2005 01:39									#48
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What the **** is a cholo?

	16-06-2005 01:43									#49
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quote: Originally posted by DerSchwarzfalke What the **** is a cholo?

mestizo or lower-class Mexican or Latin American

	16-06-2005 01:48									#50
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quote: Originally posted by Illur stop over-analyzing things spacy

Agreed.

You know you need to go for it but the rest is the personality of the two people involved and going with that flow

	16-06-2005 02:16									#51
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quote: Originally posted by Urban Ranger That certainly isn't my experience. My take is space keeps missing the non-verbal cues. There's only a window of opportunity, and if he misses it, he remains a friend.

I know plenty of cases in which friendship turned into relationships. As far I'm concerned it can happen in any circumstance.

	16-06-2005 10:43									#52
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quote: Originally posted by DerSchwarzfalke What the **** is a cholo?

Mexican gangstas yo!

	16-06-2005 11:01									#53
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Yeah, it's usually referring to Mexican gangsters

Space,

I agree with Viking Eurocom. You're at the age where you can and should take chances. Don't be afraid to take chances, try not to think too much, and just go with it. You'll get a feel for what does and doesn't work for you. I agree to not overthink. I would just say avoid it at work, though, make that your safe place where things stay simple and don't become complicated.

I see too many people overthinking nowadays, and honestly, I see this overthinking as the biggest problem with American relationships nowadays. Maybe people just watch too much Oprah or Dr. Phil, and feel like they NEED to be doing something according to some expert that wrote a book or who was on the show for 15 minutes.

Good luck with your potential chula. (Don't call her that by the way unless you actually hook up seriously with her).

	16-06-2005 11:05									#54
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quote: I agree with Viking Eurocom. You're at the age where you can and should take chances. Don't be afraid to take chances, try not to think too much, and just go with it. You'll get a feel for what does and doesn't work for you. I agree to not overthink. I would just say avoid it at work, though, make that your safe place where things stay simple and don't become complicated. I see too many people overthinking nowadays, and honestly, I see this overthinking as the biggest problem with American relationships nowadays. Maybe people just watch too much Oprah or Dr. Phil, and feel like they NEED to be doing something according to some expert that wrote a book or who was on the show for 15 minutes.

Its very difficult for me not to think. If I have so much as a few minutes alone on the toilet I will start to think. Stupid brain.

quote: Good luck with your potential chula. (Don't call her that by the way unless you actually hook up seriously with her).

Whats it mean exactly?

	16-06-2005 11:07									#55
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This is all because you're gay. Deal with it.

	16-06-2005 11:10									#56
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"Chula" just means like beautiful, usually you would call your (Hispanic, usually Mexican) girlfriend that. It's like saying "sweetheart," or "honey."

A less "heavy" term you can use if you want to call her beautiful is bonita.

Last edited by Ted Striker on 16-06-2005 at 11:47

	16-06-2005 11:10									#57
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov This is all because you're gay. Deal with it.

No. Ive considered that. Im not gay. There are gay guys at work. One of them is an older man who flirts with me, doesnt bother me, actually somewhat flattering, but the feeling is not mutual. I love *****.

	16-06-2005 11:11									#58
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ZOMFG that cat is wearing UGG boots!!! That is like sooo 2003!!!

	16-06-2005 11:12									#59
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Deny it all you want, Space. I know I did. It's your destiny.

	16-06-2005 11:22									#60
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quote: Originally posted by Boris Godunov Deny it all you want, Space. I know I did. It's your destiny.

I certainly hope not.