28-06-2005 11:01									#1
	the heat in texas... Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN TEXAS IN JULY WHEN. . . .


The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.


The trees are whistling for the dogs.


The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.


Hot water now comes out of both taps.


You can make sun tea instantly.


You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron! .


The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.


You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.


You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.


You actually burn your hand opening the car door.


You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.


Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up
lying on the pavement and cook to death?"


You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.


The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add

butter, salt and pepper.


Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying
boiled eggs.


The cows are giving evaporated milk. Ah, what a place to call home.


God Bless Our State of TEXAS !!

	28-06-2005 11:03									#2
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That doesn't sound like a blessing, more like a curse. As it should be.

	28-06-2005 11:16									#3
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God created Arrakis to train the faithful...

	28-06-2005 11:31									#4
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Kaak isn't joking, just so you know.

	30-06-2005 06:59									#5
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quote: Originally posted by SlowwHand Kaak isn't joking, just so you know.

No he isnt Sad thing is its supposed to be 100 tomorrow, with very hi humidity. Another thing that lets you know when you get in your car after being in an airconditioned building after the car has sat there in the sun for a bit and your glasses fog up

	30-06-2005 07:04									#6
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Texas deserves the punishment of extreme heat for being Texas.

	30-06-2005 07:34									#7
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Texas deserves the punishment of extreme heat for giving us Bush Jr

	30-06-2005 07:48									#8
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quote: Originally posted by Barinthus Texas deserves the punishment of extreme heat for giving us Bush Jr

Can texas really be responsible for the birth of one of the many idiots in the states?? If so shouldnt the other states that elected him president rot in hell to

	30-06-2005 08:00									#9
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I'm safe then, I'm one of those blue states

Beside your environment has alot to do with who you are as an adult

	30-06-2005 08:43									#10
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quote: Originally posted by Barinthus I'm safe then, I'm one of those blue states Beside your environment has alot to do with who you are as an adult

i guess it just means hat some of us in texas an live through the heat and apprecieate when it is actually 78 degrees, then bitc* and whine when its 35 f cause its to cold

	30-06-2005 09:30									#11
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quote: Originally posted by Barinthus Texas deserves the punishment of extreme heat for giving us Bush Jr

I thought that was Connecticut?

	30-06-2005 09:34									#12
	Re: the heat in texas... Got spare money?

I lived for awhile in New Mexico and the deserts of California. I have personally experienced:

quote: Originally posted by Kaak The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. [Also, don't park under streetlights because when you come out at night, your car will be covered with bugs] Hot water now comes out of both taps. You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron! [hot! hot! hot!] You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car. [only one finger ] You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window. You actually burn your hand opening the car door. You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. You realize that asphalt has a liquid state. [It's weird, having it stick to your shoes as your walking across it.]

	30-06-2005 09:34									#13
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Sounds like hell. Glad I'm on the Oregon Coast where it's maybe 65 and sunny today, the day before, the day before, the day before... Tomorrow it might get to 66.

	30-06-2005 09:40									#14
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WHen I was a kid growing up we had those car vinyl seats.

DAMN those things were hot.

	30-06-2005 09:51									#15
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quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker WHen I was a kid growing up we had those car vinyl seats. DAMN those things were hot.

yeah and when you had to peal your ass from those hot sweaty seats sucked to

	30-06-2005 10:19									#16
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Yup, I remember those too, on the seat of my Grandpa's camper.

Hot drive all day really sucked.

	30-06-2005 11:12									#17
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85 is considered a scorcher here. Mind you, it probably gets a lot more humid here. Before you call us wusses, you should come here when it gets real cold

	30-06-2005 11:17									#18
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quote: Originally posted by Mrs. Tuberski yeah and when you had to peal your ass from those hot sweaty seats sucked to

Hell yeah it was pretty bad. I remember the sound as you sat up, it's like when you unroll packing tape to put on a box.

	30-06-2005 11:22									#19
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quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker Hell yeah it was pretty bad. I remember the sound as you sat up, it's like when you unroll packing tape to put on a box.

I forgot to add that when you went to sit in the seat in the first place you would end up sitting on your hands the first 10 to fifteen minutes so as you dont bake your ass

	30-06-2005 11:24									#20
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But then you would brand your hands in the effort to protect your ass.

	30-06-2005 11:26									#21
	Re: the heat in texas... Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

I would offer my sympathies but, come December, West Oz just aint that much better ...

	30-06-2005 11:31									#22
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quote: Mind you, it probably gets a lot more humid here. Before you call us wusses, you should come here when it gets real cold

Uh, not really. San Antonio is rather humid.

Wuss.

	30-06-2005 12:21									#24
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun But then you would brand your hands in the effort to protect your ass.

Not if you cup your cheeks. The back of your hand is tougher and can withstand the heat.



ACK!

	30-06-2005 12:22									#25
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I forgot about that technique.

	30-06-2005 12:26									#26
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Mrs. Tubes thinks my hands are rough because of the dry Utah air. When it's simply scar tissue from this technique.



ACK!

	30-06-2005 13:05									#28
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quote: Originally posted by Tuberski Mrs. Tubes thinks my hands are rough because of the dry Utah air. When it's simply scar tissue from this technique. ACK!

Is that the real reason Hun???

	30-06-2005 16:02									#29
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quote: Originally posted by Ted Striker WHen I was a kid growing up we had those car vinyl seats. DAMN those things were hot.

Ugh don't remind me

	30-06-2005 23:46									#30
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I posted these a few years back but for Florida. Tiamat came on and said they all applied to Texas as well.