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lord of the mark
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FUKCOV - Former United Kingdom Colony of Virginia
Dec 2000 time: 00:37
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Gen Marshall: General Patton, you there?
Patton:yes, general. Ive got great news!!!
Marshall: Yes?
Patton: We've bagged over half a million German and Italian troops!!!! This will show all the naysayers at home how well the war in North Africa is going!!
Marshall: Im sorry George, we cant breathe a word of it.
Patton: WTF?
Marshall: you see, we havent acknowledged there are even that many axis troops IN North africa, and if we did, that would bring into question the number of allied troops.
Patton: So how the hell ARE you going to deal with the naysayers, if not by showing what my brave troops have done, despite being too few?
Marshall: We have a plan for Gallicization - we're hoping to pull out half your forces within the next 18 months
Patton: WTF? General, having Frog troops will be great and all that, but there wont be enough of them to win any time soon, and ive got the Krauts on the run. See, ive got this nifty little plan to invade Sicily....
Marshall: There will be NO, I repeat NO invasion of Sicily.
Patton: WTF? Bye.
Patton: Wheres my jeep, Im going for a drive.
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Straybow
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SG(2)… gone but not forgotten
Jan 1970 time: 23:37
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George W. Bush
"We are not at war with the German people. The Germans are a people of peace. Over 75% of Americans share German ancestry, and the Lutheran church is the 3rd largest denomination in the US. It is the German fundamentalists, the so-called Ariens, who threaten us and our British allies.
"We are at war with the Nazis, and we call upon the German people to stand up against the Nazis. Despite our efforts at appeasement the Nazis invaded their peaceful neighbors in the Netherlands, and their troops are positioned to take the rest of France.
"Should that happen Nazi and Japanese forces will control over half the world supply of foreign food types. While we can survive on Mexican and domestic fast food production we dare not let our access to Chinese, Italian, and French foods be threatened. This Trifecta of Evil must be countered!
"The Vichy government has recognized the threat of Arien fundamentalism, and has agreed to allow us to use ports and airstrips in France. As we pull our forces out of North Africa they will be moved into France: Operation Forest Shield. Our final thrust into the Nazi underbelly, Operation Forest Storm, will end the Arien rule of Germany."
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Ecthy
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Zhonghuà Rénmín Gònghéguó
Mar 2000 time: 06:37
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Guys with lesbian daughters didn't become vice pres in those days.
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All times are GMT. The time now is 05:37. Apolyton Time is 00:37. |
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