04-05-2002 06:16									#1
	One of life's many decisions Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

My girlfriend is fooling around on me, (i really am not going into how i know, but trust me i know). So I guess you can say we are having are first major fight. We had a really nasty Tif (i mean kitchen stuff throwing nasty) At this moment she is standing in front of our house throwing stuff at the window 'cause for some reason the door is locked.

Should I let her stand out there making an arse of herself for awhile while I sit in here and drink all her wine at the window? Or, let her in and deprive myself and my neibours of the great show of fury on my front lawn?

I am leaning toward digging out the cork screw.

	04-05-2002 06:19									#2
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Cork screw!

	04-05-2002 06:35									#3
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Any real communication requires both of you to tell the other person how he or she feels without shouting at each other, and without physical violence or the threat of physical violence.

	04-05-2002 06:43									#4
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I have mentioned in other threads that I used to be an active heroin addict. Well, I kinda 'fell off the wagon' so to speak in the last month. When I confronted her about the guy she was seen with at a bar a few towns away, she said "If you can stick a needle in your arm, I can stick a... (I really don't want to repeat it, I am sure you get the idea).

All i can say is that really hurts.

Sorry about the spelling, I have been drinking.

	04-05-2002 06:46									#5
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Well, that changes things doesn't it? Forget the corkscrew man. Help yourself.

	04-05-2002 07:39									#6
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quote: Originally posted by Tuberski Well, that changes things doesn't it? Forget the corkscrew man. Help yourself.

Yes yes i know, but I really don't see what addiction has to do with breaking someone's trust.

I really should not even be discussing these in the same thread.

	04-05-2002 07:41									#7
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

my ex-girlfriend cheated on me a few weeks into our reltionship, and I found out on Christmas day in front of her entire extended family. I took her back, spent two and a half more years with her, and then she screwed me over.

Take a guess at which side I'm going to take.

	04-05-2002 07:42									#8
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun Any real communication requires both of you to tell the other person how he or she feels without shouting at each other, and without physical violence or the threat of physical violence.

If my girlfriend were cheating on me then I wouldn't want to communicate with her.

Blisterz: Drink as much as you can, then try to piss on her head out the window.

	04-05-2002 07:43									#9
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Look, in my opinion I think you should do what's best for YOU - if she's messing around, that is totally uncool, and not your fault. Look at it like this - would you marry someone who has a history of cheating? If not. tell her to **** off, go out to the bars/clubs/wherever. and find someone better.

IMO of course.

	04-05-2002 07:44									#10
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me KrazyHorse and David Floyd all in agreement....

we must be at the nexus of the universe

	04-05-2002 07:45									#11
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if she said that, comparing a heroin addiction to what i THINK she said, she's not worth it.

	04-05-2002 07:46									#12
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I am assuming there must be somthing still there. 'cause for some reason when I see you guys tellin' me to piss on her and such I catch myself wanting to tell you off and defend her. God, I should of stuck with C.o.c.k (sorry had to write it that way, or it would of been stared out) .

	04-05-2002 07:46									#13
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You better be sure she ****ed around on you, though. It's sorta hard to apologise for drenching someone in your alcohol-laden urine...

	04-05-2002 07:52									#14
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quote: I am assuming there must be somthing still there. 'cause for some reason when I see you guys tellin' me to piss on her and such I catch myself wanting to tell you off and defend her. God, I should of stuck with C.o.c.k (sorry had to write it that way, or it would of been stared out) .

Chances are that's natural. You've had feelings for her for a while (I'm assuming this is a long relationship)

I felt the same way after my breakup. I'd talk about how angry I was at her, my friends would agree, and then I'd tell them they were wrong. It's a natural thing, but you'll get over it...

I know I did

	04-05-2002 07:53									#15
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Thanks for putting up with my whining guys. Sitting her talking to your guys and listening to tunes is really helping drown out the banging and screaming downstairs.

	04-05-2002 07:56									#16
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quote: Originally posted by Blisterz Thanks for putting up with my whining guys. Sitting her talking to your guys and listening to tunes is really helping drown out the banging and screaming downstairs.

Whining? No way...despite what Albert Speer would say on the matter, girls are just as evil as guys...and it sucks ass when they do something as vile as ****ing around on you.

Let her scream and bang, it's good to get aggression out

	04-05-2002 07:57									#17
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quote: I am assuming there must be somthing still there. 'cause for some reason when I see you guys tellin' me to piss on her and such I catch myself wanting to tell you off and defend her.

Of course there's still "something" there. That something is not what's best for you, though. Don't worry about what's good for her - obviously after cheating on you she doesn't care. Just tell her what's up, how you feel, and then go out with your single friends and meet women.

	04-05-2002 08:00									#18
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun Any real communication requires both of you to tell the other person how he or she feels without shouting at each other, and without physical violence or the threat of physical violence.

Try to say something tongue in cheek for once...

	04-05-2002 08:01									#19
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quote: Originally posted by David Floyd Of course there's still "something" there. That something is not what's best for you, though. Don't worry about what's good for her - obviously after cheating on you she doesn't care. Just tell her what's up, how you feel, and then go out with your single friends and meet women.

I'd say "don't make the same mistake I did" becuase of how it ended, but I genuinely don't regret my relationship with my ex....just wish she wouldn't have dicked me over for no reason and become a fake little slut*****.

Just be careful, whatever decision you make, and know that whatever decision you do make, it's not YOUR fault for how things turned out, it's HERS. Don't let her tell you otherwise. She broke the rules, she has to accept your decision.

Good luck in whatever decision you make though

	04-05-2002 08:02									#20
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Ditch her...

	04-05-2002 08:03									#21
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You broke her trust as well. What you need to decide is whether what you like about her is enough to get over the betrayal of your trust, and vice versa. I would not counsel you either way. I don't know anywhere near enough about the subject. That's only something you can decide.

I can tell you at somepoint the police are likely to show up, probably soon, so you probably shouldn't get drunk and you may want to dispose of any stash you have.

	04-05-2002 08:05									#22
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The real kicker here, is that I never wanted a monogamous relationship, I don't/didn't believe in them. She was the one that wanted something a bit more 'solid'. The whole monogamy thing was a really big 'topic' (i use that world lightly) when this relationship started. I don't think you should not be allowed to **** other people, you should not want to 'cause you care about the person. So ya, I guess this SHOULD be ok by me, right?

	04-05-2002 08:06									#23
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quote: Originally posted by chegitz guevara You broke her trust as well. What you need to decide is whether what you like about her is enough to get over the betrayal of your trust, and vice versa. I would not counsel you either way. I don't know anywhere near enough about the subject. That's only something you can decide. I can tell you at somepoint the police are likely to show up, probably soon, so you probably shouldn't get drunk and you may want to dispose of any stash you have.

Wooo, stop right there. I never broke her trust, I was on the juice (methadone) and doing 5 points a day when we got together. She knew what she was getting into.

	04-05-2002 08:08									#24
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quote: Originally posted by Blisterz The real kicker here, is that I never wanted a monogamous relationship, I don't/didn't believe in them. She was the one that wanted something a bit more 'solid'. The whole monogamy thing was a really big 'topic' (i use that world lightly) when this relationship started. I don't think you should not be allowed to **** other people, you should not want to 'cause you care about the person. So ya, I guess this SHOULD be ok by me, right?

Mine was talking about MARRIAGE KIDS AND we just got finished planning a SUMMER VACATION together just days before she broke it off with me WITHOUT PROVOCATION!

They're evil I tell ya, EVIL!

Edit: She was the one bringing all of the above up, I was going along with it but hesitantly.

	04-05-2002 08:22									#25
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dump her.

Then get cleaned up.

	04-05-2002 08:25									#26
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quote: Originally posted by GP dump her. Then get cleaned up.

I am really planning to get off the junk again, and for good this time. but it may be a long time (if ever) I get off the methadone. I am down to 100 mils (down from 125) but when i go any lower I start to get really sick.

About the girl, she's not down there anymore, and now I'm sad. God I hate stuff like this

	04-05-2002 08:26									#27
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sleep on it man. Best place there is to escape pain, and certainly better than drugs

	04-05-2002 08:28									#28
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oh and by the way: start an exercise program if you decide to ditch her. Not only to you have more free time on your hands, but you'll have added motivation (anger from the breakup)

I lost a few pounds and gained some real definition from my breakup, and it hasn't even been a month yet.

Well, just some advice from experience. Besides, gotta look good, you're back on the market

	04-05-2002 08:30									#29
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quote: Originally posted by orange oh and by the way: start an exercise program if you decide to ditch her. Not only to you have more free time on your hands, but you'll have added motivation (anger from the breakup) I lost a few pounds and gained some real definition from my breakup, and it hasn't even been a month yet. Well, just some advice from experience. Besides, gotta look good, you're back on the market

At the expense of sounding mushy, thanks. I was getting all water eyed for a bit but you really made me smile.

So ya, thanks (damn you, I am blushing) :P

	04-05-2002 08:33									#30
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quote: Originally posted by Blisterz At the expense of sounding mushy, thanks. I was getting all water eyed for a bit but you really made me smile. So ya, thanks (damn you, I am blushing) :P

No problem. I've been where you are. It sucks, plain and simple.

But there are definite positives that come from break ups, just gotta try to look on the brightside, surround yourself with other loved ones (friends, family) and try to get your mind off of it all.