01-01-2004 15:09									#361
	Inflate your Upload Space

granted. it eats ten instead.

i wish i had gone home with those two lesbians, instead of driving my freinds home.

	01-01-2004 15:16									#362
	Browse Apolyton AD-FREE

Granted. Welcome to another night of no sex.

I wish my birthday was on a different day of the year.

	01-01-2004 15:29									#363
	Get a bigger avatar today!

x-post: at least i would have gotten to watch.

	01-01-2004 21:34									#364
	Enter the AD-FREE zone

Granted. Laz, your birthday is on February the 29th. 1/4 of the birthdays for you!

I wish all Corrupt Wish participants (except me) would die painfully and slowly

	01-01-2004 21:36									#365
	Increase Your PM Length

They say "life is pain," and everyone is cursed by a lot of it. It's a long, slow time in dying. Except you. You die in the next 20 seconds.

I wish you changed your name to enema nova.

	01-01-2004 21:37									#366
	Support Apolyton, buy GURPS/ Alpha Centauri

x-post, sorry.

	01-01-2004 21:37									#367
	Support Apolyton, buy GURPS/ Alpha Centauri

own goal

	03-01-2004 02:38									#368
	Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

enigma_nova is now enema_nova. you, thebene, however, never have your name spelled properly again.

i wish i had a superpowerful starship under my command.

	03-01-2004 08:49									#369
	Browse Apolyton AD-FREE

Granted. Unfortunately, you start having problems with it, and the instruction book is in Klingon.

I wish Apolyton would forever cease to exist.

	03-01-2004 11:58									#370
	Support Apolyton, pre-order Civilization IV

It does. The Artificial Intelligence running that portion of the Matrix gets bored. All users are deleted along with it.

I wish somebody sold a nice, inexpensive, reliable 500 watt power supply, that I could order, for my ill computer.

	05-01-2004 00:43									#371
	Got spare money?

Granted. You get your power supply, and it works very well. Unfortunately, the hard drive goes bad.

I wish the Corrupt Wish thread would go on forever.

	05-01-2004 00:48									#372
	Support Apolyton

Granted. Now some of the greatest minds the world has to offer spend their entire lives posting here. The world descends into mutiny and financial ruin.

I wish I was still 10 years old.

	05-01-2004 00:52									#373
	Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

quote: Originally posted by Verres I wish I was still 10 years old.

Granted, alas "Father Jimmy" takes a special likeing to you...


I wish I had a SR-71

	05-01-2004 12:58									#374
	Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

You do. The maintenance costs drive you into bankruptcy. You sell it on ebay, and discover you just sold it the the PRC. You are arrested on espionage charges, and spend the rest of your life at in prison.

I wish Firaxis would release the source code for Alpha Centauri.

	05-01-2004 17:31									#375
	Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

Granted. It turns out they wrote it in assembly. Good luck with it!

I wish the source code for Civilization II was released , and several (former) developers decide to help out the community and volunteer to help improve it in their spare time.

	06-01-2004 06:35									#376
	Tired of ads?

Its released, but their "improvements" include the suggestions that went to Firaxis for Civ3. Basically Civ2 becomes Civ3 and everyone is angry.

I wish nuclear power wasn't dangerous.

	06-01-2004 10:23									#377
	Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

Granted. Nuclear power becomes such a great form of energy, since it is no longer dangerous, that a nuclear power plant is built in your backyard.

I wish my dog wouldn't try to French-kiss me. Ewww.

	06-01-2004 11:19									#378
	Inflate your Upload Space

Granted -- now all the stray dogs try to hump you by your leg whenever they see you.

I wish that cottage cheese would stay fresh forever.

	06-01-2004 11:56									#379
	Put an end to popups!

granted. it now tastes like it's gone off all the time now.

i wish i could control and manipulate shadows with mere thoughts.

	06-01-2004 11:59									#380
	Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

Granted. But now milk goes bad after ten minutes, and after an hour you find that the milk in your fridge has turned into cottage cheese.

I wish all poetry had to be written as a pi mnemonic (i.e. Poe E. Near a Raven... = 3.1415, see poetry thread...)

edit - crosspost...

	06-01-2004 20:58									#381
	Support Apolyton, buy Call to Power 2

Self-Biased: You can. You have to, because you are now a vampire. No more sex, sunlight, or alchohol.

ICBM: Now only mathameticians read poetry, and bored ones at that. It becomes a dead artform. Less than 1% of 1% bother to read it.

I wish that all cats were genuinely nice, affable creatures who were generally well-behaved (toally well-behaved is just impossible )

	07-01-2004 01:48									#382
	Support Apolyton

quote: Originally posted by shawnmmcc I wish that all cats were genuinely nice, affable creatures who were generally well-behaved (toally well-behaved is just impossible )

Granted. However the definition of "genuinely nice, affable... [and] well-behaved" is modified to fit the behavior of cats, meaning "loony, fur-brained beasts that claw your eyes out if you don't feed them in 15 seconds."

I wish my cat would quit chucking up hairballs.

	07-01-2004 01:50									#383
	Got spare money?

I wish I could see Theben naked not.

	07-01-2004 01:57									#384
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization 2

****ing tease.

	07-01-2004 02:02									#385
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

No, actually I really want that not.

	07-01-2004 02:19									#386
	Support Apolyton, buy GURPS/ Alpha Centauri

You cat stops upchucking fur balls. Instead they get stuck on the way out, and you have to give it enemas (no joking, this has happened to someone I know - cat's DO NOT like enemas)

I wish Theban decided to become a male stripper, and make Ecthelion HAPPY.

	07-01-2004 02:22									#387
	Increase the size of your Attachments

Theban becomes a male stripper. However Theben does not.

I wish shawnmmcc would learn to spell my name right and quit pretending to be a n00b.

	07-01-2004 03:39									#388
	Get a bigger avatar today!

Shawnmmcc is cured of his partial dsylexia - and you discover how really obnoxious he is.

I wish Theben was a genuinely nice, affable creature who was generally well-behaved (toally well-behaved is just impossible )

	07-01-2004 06:57									#389
	Increase the size of your Attachments

Granted. Theben becomes a genuinely nice, affable ... well-behaved creature, and this change in his behavior causes him to leave Apolyton forever. Normally, this would be a good thing, but it causes the corrupt wish thread to sink to page 100 of OT.

I wish Theben would change his name to Th*b*n, to allow for the spelling mistakes of people pretending to be n00bs.

	07-01-2004 07:40									#390
	Inflate your Upload Space

Theben's name changes to Th*b*n and Ming thinks its such a good idea that no one is allowed to use vowels in their name anymore. *CBM, *cth*l**n and sh*wnmmcc are irritated.

I wish staplers never had to be refilled with staples in order to work.