27-06-2004 14:17									#181
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer who wants to treat women right and his love perfectly. is there something wrong with this?

YES

	27-06-2004 15:02									#182
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Get down to earth Albert! Relationships don't start with poetry and flowers. Girls don't expect or want that bullshit - and anyway, there's nothing in that that the next man couldn't fake too. Act yourself - not this overblown, metrosexual, romantic fool that the media likes to tell us guys to be.

And take a look at www.sosuave.com

	27-06-2004 16:52									#183
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer but arent i mature? i never had that horny, rambucous teenager stage. i never did anything wrong; never rebelled; never did drugs; never had sex. i'm just a young man dreaming of better days... dreaming that he can reach the stars though he obviously never will. is that immature?

Albert, you whine and mope. And girls don't like whiners or mopers. It's that simple.

	27-06-2004 16:57									#184
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer as hard as it may seem for you to believe, i'm a nice, sweet, and loving guy who wants to treat women right and his love perfectly. is there something wrong with this? is this horseshit? do i beget horseshit and drivel?

But you do so by imposing what you think women want and need, not by what they actually want or need. Why date a condescending sap who doesn't really think that you're as capable as a guy (which is what this all boils down to), when there are 3,000,000,000 others out there who won't condescend?

	27-06-2004 17:06									#185
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@AS: You're more pathetic than me.

	27-06-2004 17:07									#186
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Yeah but you're Irresitably Attractive

	27-06-2004 18:32									#187
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Clearly in threadjack land now.

	27-06-2004 20:19									#188
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Oh Jeez Speer,
Are you looking for validation for your current unsuccessful behavior or do you really want to make a change that will benefit you?
Nobody is sugar coating the truth here for you, since it isn't always pretty.
Stop, Look, listen and Learn. Nobody here has ANYTHING to gain from this but you.

Last edited by LTEC! on 27-06-2004 at 20:31

	27-06-2004 20:20									#189
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Hey Striker did you agree with my advice?

	27-06-2004 20:50									#190
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer MtG: why does it seem that you have no love in your cold heart?

Because apparently you think putting women on a pedestal ("God's most perfect creation") where (a) they are objects, (b) they can't live up to your (or anyone else's) concept of being "God's most perfect creation", and (c) when you spout horseshit like that, you come across as not seeing a woman for the human being she is, but as some mythical creature of your own invention, and the actual woman in question has merely to live up to your standard of what she should be.

quote: as hard as it may seem for you to believe, i'm a nice, sweet, and loving guy

So was Ted Bundy. Your point? What you are is absolutely meaningless if you remain so self-absorbed in your own ideas and concepts of what women should be and how relationships should be, that you don't treat women (or whoever else you deal with) as independent human beings, each with their own thoughts, feelings, motivations, and intentions. AND RIGHTS. I.e. the right to make their own decisions, pick their own priorities, and do things according to their way, not what you think their way should be.

quote: who wants to treat women right and his love perfectly.

There is no such thing as treating anyone or anything "perfectly." Screw perfection, because honey, you ain't close, and neither is anyone else you're going to deal with in this lifetime. Be yourself, and let other people be themselves.

quote: is there something wrong with this?

Yes, see above and just about everyone else's related post.

quote: is this horseshit?

It is such a steaming, monumental mound of horseshit, the likes of which Stuart's, Napoleon's and Alexander's cavalry could not produce in ten thousand years.

quote: do i beget horseshit and drivel?

Do you really want me to answer, or was this a rhetorical question?

	27-06-2004 20:52									#191
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i dont understand. in essence, yall are telling me to not be nice. that cant be a better alternative... i have to be an arse like a british poster on here whose name rhymes with pink? really now?

	27-06-2004 20:55									#192
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Keep it up

	27-06-2004 20:56									#193
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MtG

for some reason you think i'm dominating. if anythign, im the opposite extreme... i always leave it up to the girl where to go, what to do, etc. something which i thought was a bad thing because it dont show my alpha male properties.

	27-06-2004 20:58									#194
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"i always leave it up to the girl where to go, what to do, etc. something which i thought was a bad thing because it dont show my alpha male properties."

Have you been to www.sosuave.com yet?

	27-06-2004 21:17									#195
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i have no intention of being a pimp, spink... the don juan site isnt designed for relationships only one night stands.

im still trying to get to the crux of what yall are saying. i shouldnt treat a girl special but just as a person? thats an odd dilemna for me because if id want to be with a girl, that girl has to be better than other people in my eyes or why would i want to be with her? right? if i try to lower my opinion of her and see her as any other girl then i'd lose interest in her, right? is there some way of devalueing a person and still liking them? i know youll say, but your high values are false and no girl will fulfill them, etc. but stop that nonsense. some people sure as hell are better than everybody else. if i meet a girl who is beautiful, smart, etc. and has every trait that makes her superior to the common man, are you saying i should convince myself she is not superior?

as for confidence... ive been told many times by christian people that my apparently extreme pride is a sin but i guess there's a difference between pride and confidence. i dont know.

	27-06-2004 21:28									#196
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spink:

i do have to say that one article about variety... wearing different types of clothes, wearing different clothes, different hair styles, etc. is a damn good idea. dynamism is always great as in a way, it makes you into a new person everytime in her eyes, not the same person she will always know. married men must struggle at this though.

the meat of the articles, though, is simple things that i already know such as the commandments to body language or how to start a conversation. i know a lot of this stuff and i apply some but other things just doesnt seem me. my pride, i suppose...

every morning, usually when i'm working out, i start my day with that Nietzschean attitude of, there cant be a god because i can't bear him not being me. i go out wearing my 200 dollar clothes, with rap music in my headphones, not that depressive rock crap. im set to rule the day but i guess i'm not satisfied with small victories and i come down by nighttime.

Last edited by Albert Speer on 27-06-2004 at 21:37

	27-06-2004 21:29									#197
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer MtG for some reason you think i'm dominating. if anythign, im the opposite extreme... i always leave it up to the girl where to go, what to do, etc. something which i thought was a bad thing because it dont show my alpha male properties.

Women (not "girls" since I haven't dated one in over 15 years), prefer men who are decisive, confident in themselves and their tastes, and who can handle ALL of the small stuff and most of the big stuff. Like deciding where to go for dinner. Of course they want input and for you to listen to them, but even more importantly, they want the decision.

	27-06-2004 21:34									#198
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer spink: i do have to say that one article about variety... wearing different types of clothes, wearing different clothes, different hair styles, etc. is a damn good idea. dynamism is always great as in a way, it makes you into a new person everytime in her eyes, not the same person she will always know. married men must struggle at this though.

I don't know. My wife loves me, not the clothes I wear. There is a picture from when we first started dating (like within the first couple of weeks) on our dresser and I'll be goddamned if I don't look exactly the same. Same hair style, same blue jeans, same long-sleeved white shirt. Hell, right now I'm wearing the exact same getup that I was wearing back then.

I really, really discount the idea that a woman wants you to turn

"into a new person everytime in her eyes, not the same person she will always know."

	27-06-2004 21:36									#199
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer MtG for some reason you think i'm dominating. if anythign, im the opposite extreme... i always leave it up to the girl where to go, what to do, etc. something which i thought was a bad thing because it dont show my alpha male properties.

What alpha male properties?

Maybe "passive-aggressive" is the term we've been looking for. You don't have to be a domineering moron, but neither do you have to be a doormat. If you can't or won't make a decision on a date, or can't or won't express any opinions or have any input, why the hell would any girl/woman find that attractive?

Balance, Albert. You know, that wide middle zone in between extremes?

	27-06-2004 21:39									#200
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quote: Balance, Albert. You know, that wide middle zone in between extremes?

i dont like aristotle

	27-06-2004 21:44									#201
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. . . . . . . .



why did I open this thread again?

	27-06-2004 21:50									#202
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quote: Originally posted by JohnT I really, really discount the idea that a woman wants you to turn "into a new person everytime in her eyes, not the same person she will always know."

It depends on the woman. As much as I love her, my girlfriend does want me to get new clothes, and she even convinced me of buying new glasses, despite the current ones being perfectly adapted to my optics.

The struggle isn't unbearable, but she often hints that she'd like a change from me. And I have trouble making her understand that any noticable change I'll undergo will come from the dephts of my personality, and not from external pressure.

	27-06-2004 21:53									#203
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quote: Originally posted by JohnT I don't know. My wife loves me, not the clothes I wear. There is a picture from when we first started dating (like within the first couple of weeks) on our dresser and I'll be goddamned if I don't look exactly the same. Same hair style, same blue jeans, same long-sleeved white shirt. Hell, right now I'm wearing the exact same getup that I was wearing back then. I really, really discount the idea that a woman wants you to turn "into a new person everytime in her eyes, not the same person she will always know."

Speer-ee-oo!

Let me put it this way. If changing your hairstyle and buying lots of different clothes (more horseshit, but this time it's Madison Avenue "spend, spend, spend" merchandising horseshit, not yours) makes you "into a new person" in some girl/woman's eyes - then what does that say about the impact of your character and personality?

Having a reasonable sense of style is one thing, pissing away all your money on trying to look different every time is another. It makes you look stupid (spending disproportionately to your income), and unsure of yourself (have no sense of style or "you" and try to fake it).

	27-06-2004 21:54									#204
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun . . . . . . . . why did I open this thread again?

Because you want to see Speer get abuser, er, um, educated, about the world.

	27-06-2004 21:57									#205
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How could I have known what was in the thread before opening if last time, there was no indication it was going this way?

	27-06-2004 21:59									#206
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quote: Originally posted by MrFun How could I have known what was in the thread before opening if last time, there was no indication it was going this way?

All you'd have to do is see the front page with the last post by column having Albert in it, and you'd know. You'd just know.

	27-06-2004 22:02									#207
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You know Speer, these "Madonna/Whore" complexes are so 1950's.

	27-06-2004 22:02									#208
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sigh

	27-06-2004 22:04									#209
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MtG

quote: more horseshit, but this time it's Madison Avenue "spend, spend, spend" merchandising horseshit

so you just proved the don juan site writers wrong and with possible connections to the boutique business. thats great. the general idea of variety is a good one though. im going to put on a bright white Dickie today instead of my usual State Prop military/prison garb.

	27-06-2004 22:14									#210
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to sum it up. you're inmature. you have no sense of who you really are. have no sense of what a woman is actually about. you're not in check with your own emotions and your outlook in life. you're not an independent thinker.
you seem to thrive on attention be it positive or negative but this got old real fast.
go to the library and check a book out that will teach you to be a man. a human being first. If you can't figure it out other people will for you and will steer clear because they know you're coming.

Case closed.