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Imran Siddiqui is offline Imran Siddiqui

Deity
The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:14
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#1 Report this post to a moderator
I want to start a religion based on beer. Support Apolyton, buy Galactic Civilizations

But I need some principles and a Holy Book of course. I figure there are so many religions that put down alcohol (and one, Catholicism that seems to really, really embrace it), that beer needs some help (without the pointy hats... unless if we get real drunk and decide to put napkins on our heads).

So, we need some Commandments first of all...

Verto is offline Verto

King

Mar 2002
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:15
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Beer tastes like ****.

Imran Siddiqui is offline Imran Siddiqui

Deity
The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:17
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#3 Report this post to a moderator
Got spare money?

You have no taste...

Verto, you are EXCOMMUNICATED!

Verto is offline Verto

King

Mar 2002
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:19
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#4 Report this post to a moderator
Got spare money?

Vodka pwnz j00 imran!

Imran Siddiqui is offline Imran Siddiqui

Deity
The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:21
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Beer pwns Verto... Beer pwns Vodka... Beer pwns the world!

Datajack Franit is offline Datajack Franit
King
Bologna
Aug 2002
time: 06:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:25 Visit Datajack Franit's homepage!
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#6 Report this post to a moderator
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WINE!

Rufus T. Firefly is offline Rufus T. Firefly
Prince
is one way of saying it, though I prefer "mensch"
Sep 2000
time: 07:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:30
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You've been to The Church Brewworks in Pittsburgh, right?

Verto is offline Verto

King

Mar 2002
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:33
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Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

quote:
Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui
Beer pwns Verto... Beer pwns Vodka... Beer pwns the world!



Nay. Beer = ****

Vodka = MORE MORE MORE

Imran Siddiqui is offline Imran Siddiqui

Deity
The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:39
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quote:
Originally posted by Rufus T. Firefly
You've been to The Church Brewworks in Pittsburgh, right?


I wish... mmm, beer in Latin (maybe)

Zevico is offline Zevico
Chieftain
Melbourne
Apr 2002
time: 15:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 07:40
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"A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All"

Mrs. Tuberski is offline Mrs. Tuberski
Princess
universal city tx
Jan 2005
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:07
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I got one
thou shall not leave a fridge with out beer in it

nostromo is offline nostromo
Prince
Montréal, Québec
Mar 2002
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:11
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Aren't you a Muslim, Imran? Allah will not be happy. Btw, why can't Muslims drink alcool?

Sava is offline Sava
King
GO GO GO!
Mar 2001
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:13
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if ur gonna make a religion...

do it with a good substance

Imran Siddiqui is offline Imran Siddiqui

Deity
The Potterverse
Jan 1970
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:15
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quote:
Originally posted by Mrs. Tuberski
I got one
thou shall not leave a fridge with out beer in it




Thou shalt not drink "Lite" beer.

nostromo is offline nostromo
Prince
Montréal, Québec
Mar 2002
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:15
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Pot makes nostromo go

Frankychan is offline Frankychan
King
In the Kingdom of Hawaii (CPA Member)
Sep 2001
time: 19:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:15 Visit Frankychan's homepage!
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"Thou shalt covet thy neighbors beer if thou has none."



"A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All." ===== Excellent.

nostromo is offline nostromo
Prince
Montréal, Québec
Mar 2002
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:21
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#17 Report this post to a moderator
Help yourself to an AD-FREE life

Beware! Beer makes you fat!

Rufus T. Firefly is offline Rufus T. Firefly
Prince
is one way of saying it, though I prefer "mensch"
Sep 2000
time: 07:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:22
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quote:
Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui


I wish... mmm, beer in Latin (maybe)


That's right -- Shi's in Pittsburgh, not you. My bad.

The Church Brew Works is an old Catholic Church -- built sometime between 1880-1920 I'd guess -- that the diocese didn't need any more. So they desanctified it and sold it, and a restauranteur bought it right at the beginning of the brewpub craze. So-so beer, very good food, but here's the thing: The vats for brewing the beer are located Sanctuary, exactly where the altar used to be!

Perhaps a pilgrimage is in order?

Last edited by Rufus T. Firefly on 26-08-2005 at 08:27

Whoha is offline Whoha
King
The TOC is supposed to be classified guys...
Dec 2001
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:23
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#19 Report this post to a moderator
Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

Beer needs no religion.

Rufus T. Firefly is offline Rufus T. Firefly
Prince
is one way of saying it, though I prefer "mensch"
Sep 2000
time: 07:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:28
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Increase Your PM Length

Behold the Church!

http://www.churchbrew.com/

Zkribbler is offline Zkribbler
King
Los Angeles, CA, USA
Feb 1999
time: 21:37
Talking  Old Post 26-08-2005 08:29
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#21 Report this post to a moderator
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Commandments

(1) While on thy knees, thou shalt pray to St. John.

(2) If thou shalt live through this night, thou shalt never ever drink another drop again, ever. And this time, thou shalt really mean it!

DerSchwarzfalke is offline DerSchwarzfalke
Chieftain
USA
Jul 2002
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:05 Visit DerSchwarzfalke's homepage!
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#22 Report this post to a moderator
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www.beeradvocate.com

Collect the various beer reviews into a religious work, and you have yourself a democratic religion of taste.

"Thou shalt support microbreweries."

*drinks a Harpoon Summer Ale*

Mrs. Tuberski is offline Mrs. Tuberski
Princess
universal city tx
Jan 2005
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:07
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quote:
Originally posted by Frankychan
"Thou shalt covet thy neighbors beer if thou has none."



"A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All." ===== Excellent.

ah dude that was my next one man but I
was having trouble with the words cause i would never break that commandment

Last edited by Mrs. Tuberski on 26-08-2005 at 09:13

Ben Kenobi is offline Ben Kenobi
Emperor
McGregornobi!
Oct 2002
time: 21:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:14
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#24 Report this post to a moderator
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Mine would be thou who art closest shall fetch thy neighbour's beer.

Boris Godunov is offline Boris Godunov
King
Portland, OR
Aug 2001
time: 00:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:28
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Wasn't this already covered by the Lutherans?

Berzerker is offline Berzerker
Emperor
topeka, kansas,USA
May 1999
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:39
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how about a beer based on a religion? Just saw a news piece on some monastery on the Danube getting flooded. They've been making beer for centuries (I think) to raise money and has become quite popular. Weltenburg Beer or something like it...

Rufus T. Firefly is offline Rufus T. Firefly
Prince
is one way of saying it, though I prefer "mensch"
Sep 2000
time: 07:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:44
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#27 Report this post to a moderator
Tired of ads?

quote:
Originally posted by Berzerker
how about a beer based on a religion? Just saw a news piece on some monastery on the Danube getting flooded. They've been making beer for centuries (I think) to raise money and has become quite popular. Weltenburg Beer or something like it...


I think it was actually some Belgian beer (or maybe lambic) brewed by Trappist. Won a "Best beer in the World" contest and they sold everything they had in stock, almost immediately. Then -- because irony never sleeps -- they announced they would no longer be brewing the beer, because they were monks, not businessmen, and were actually trying to avoid worldly pursuits.

Solomwi is offline Solomwi

King
Don King of the Apolyton HLA Movement
Dec 2002
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:49
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Remove this text

Finally, a religion I can get behind.

Whilst it be acceptable to eliminate from one's dogma any beer deemed unworthy, thou shalt not pass an opportunity to expose thyself to new beers to take into consideration for dogmatic inclusion. (Basically, a more comprehensive restatement of "Thou shalt support microbreweries.")

When in doubt, the optimum number of the temperature shall be thirty-eight degrees on the scale of Fahrenheit, no more and no less. Thirty-eight shall be thy number, and they number shall be thrity-eight, not thirty-seven, nor thirty-nine, excepting of course the case in which the number does proceed directly to thirty-eight...

Since this shall be an inclusive religion, the pint and the liter shall be deemed equally acceptable units of measure.

We acknowledge the barley and the hop as the source from which all beer floweth, and thus holdeth these gifts of nature in the highest reverence.

Rufus T. Firefly is offline Rufus T. Firefly
Prince
is one way of saying it, though I prefer "mensch"
Sep 2000
time: 07:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 09:59
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#29 Report this post to a moderator
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Given recent developments in the beverage world, I must insist on this commandment:

Only Beer is beer, and thou shalt have no other beer than Beer. The ale, the porter, the stout, the lambic -- these for you may be Beer. But verily, Zima is not beer; nor is Bud Extreme beer. And if it tastes more like lemonade, or fruit punch, or wine cooler than beer, then, even if it is called beer, thou shalt not drink of it, for it is not Beer.

Solomwi is offline Solomwi

King
Don King of the Apolyton HLA Movement
Dec 2002
time: 23:37
  Old Post 26-08-2005 10:07
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Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

Rufus, getting to the very core of what we need.

 
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