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devilmunchkin
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first circle of the inferno
Jul 2001 time: 05:21
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warcraft 3:
"mortar combat!"
"what is nature's call?"
"more work?"
"istand for the light"
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MosesPresley
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This isn't a one liner, but I thought it was pretty funny.
The following is from Max Payne. Before Max enters a room, he often hears snippets of conversation from the npc's. This was from a television show one of the gangsters was watching.
Previously on Lords and Ladies. - announcer
Lady Amelia, Markia Valentine asks for and audience.
Thank you Lawrence. - lady amelia
My lady? - markia valentine
My lord? - lady amelia
And now an all new episode of Lords and Ladies. - announcer
cue cheezy music
My lady? - markia valentine
My lord? - lady amelia
My lady there is a matter of great importance which I must bring to your attention. - markia valentine
My lord, there is? - lady amelia
Indeed, my lady, there is indeed. From the very first moment we met upon that distant forest path, there has been sunlight in the autumn leaves blazing like the colors of your hair. - markia valentine
My lord, you should not speak so. - lady amelia
But my lady, I must. I must. - markia valentine
My lord, no! I...this cannot be. - lady amelia
But why my love? Why? - markia valentine
My lord it is too dreadful. Do not force me to speak the words. - lady amelia
My lady I beg of you. I must know. I would rather die than not know. - markia valentine
Yes my lord, we should both be dead for this shame is too great for the living. My lord, I am... My lord, I am your long lost sister. - lady amelia
cue cheezy music
Oh...sniff...Lady Amelia...so tragic. Will they ever get together? - teary eyed gangster
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Jethro83
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Newcastle, Australia
Mar 2002 time: 15:21
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"I'd never claim that you would live forever after trying one of my potions. Only that you might look as though you had."
- Alkor, Diablo II
"Make more friends!"
- Foreign Advisor, Civ III
"I lost a bomb. Do you have it?"
- Crazy Ivan, Red Alert 2
"Name! Job! Bye!"
- The Avatar, Ultima IV-VII
Last edited by Jethro83 on 28-08-2002 at 08:06
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Jethro83
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Newcastle, Australia
Mar 2002 time: 15:21
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"What's a Paladin?"
The Avatar, U9
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devilmunchkin
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first circle of the inferno
Jul 2001 time: 05:21
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"what what what?"
from Halo
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devilmunchkin
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first circle of the inferno
Jul 2001 time: 05:21
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"there's ma buddy" -munch from Munch's Oddysee
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Traianvs
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Belgium, land of plenty (corruption)
Jan 2000 time: 06:21
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Yeah, conversing with Lilarcor the sword in BG2 is awesome...every now and then he says things like... can't we go kill something now please? pleaaaaaaaaaaaase? what about that one over there.. or no THAT one!
or, KILL, KILL, KILL, YEAAAAAH!!!
duke nukem has of course the best oneliners..
so many babes, so little time
nobody steals our chicks... and lives
it's time to kick ass or chew bubblegum, and i'm all outta gum!
hail to the king baby
NOWAY i'm eating that **** (when the duke enters his own Dukeburger restaurant )
your face, your ass, what's the difference..
damn, you're an inspiration for birth control!
...ooh that's GOTTA hurt 
huhehehe, what a mess! (happens when you gib about 5 enemies at once )
there are many more of course, and they're even better when you here em live with duke's voice!
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mactbone
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Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven
Sep 2001 time: 23:21
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W00t! Just found a place full of Planescape quotes!
Nameless One: "I wonder what it was I said that made Death reject me."
Nameless One: "One foot in grave, the other in hell."
Nameless One: "Um... has anyone seen a floating sarcastic skull around here?"
Nameless One: "No wonder my back hurts; there's a damn novel written there."
(thanks to The Greater Quasit)
Annah: "Get yer eyes off my arse!"
Annah: "You like my wee tail? I’ll wag it at ye!"
Annah: "If you keep bobbing about skull, I’m gonna mount you at the end of a pike!"
Dak’kon: "Your path is mine."
Dak’kon: "Your reasons for your incessant clicking are not *known* to me."
Dak’kon: "There cannot be two skies!"
Dak’kon: "Endure. In enduring, grow strong."
Dak’kon: "Strength lies in *knowing* oneself."
(thanks to Paul Templar for this one)
Nordom: "Nordom and crossbows wish to go in search for trouble!"
Nordom: "I sleep in a drawer."
Nordom: "I’m a little Modron short and stout."
Nordom: "I think therefore I am... I think"
Nordom: "Said desire will begin immediately."
Nordom: "I estimate that Fall-from-Grace would be 51% more effective as a modron. Give or take 5,2%."
Nordom: "I estimate Fall-from-Grace to be found attractive by the male sex of over 321423 separate species. Give or take 5."
Morte: "Oh sure. I'll just swing it with my arms." (When trying to equip him with any weapons)
(thanks to Extremist for this gem)
Morte: "Come on! Let's shake a leg... Well... YOU shake a leg..."
(thanks to Sam for this quote)
Morte: "Women are the reason I became a monk... and the reason I changed back..."
Morte: "We should get some female zombies to join our party, right chief?"
Morte: "You know, if I could click you, you wouldn’t know a moment’s peace!"
Morte: "I am both happy and miserable, without the happy part!"
Morte: "Like Latin… for Death."
Morte: "Graaaace... you wanna put ME in your inventory?"
(thanks to Flare Dragon Ceiphied for this one)
Morte: "This place is locked up tighter than a chastity belt!"
(thanks to Matt for this one)
Morte: "Graaaace! I need your sensory touch!"
Morte: "You know, it wouldn't kill you to say a few words to me, fiendling... or hug me... or KISS me!" (Talking to Annah)
Morte: "That beauty sleep didn't help much." (When Nameless One awakens after being killed)
Morte: "Talk about beating a dead horse!" (When Nameless One dies)
Vhailor: "Justice is not blind, for I am her eyes!"
Vhailor: "Mercy is a shield used by the weak!"
Vhailor: "Who goes there?"
Vhailor: "While we await, mercy and evil seep into the hearts of more victims!"
Vhailor: "You will not escape my axe again!"
Vhailor: "Your crimes cry out for justice!"
Vhailor: "Perfection through punishment."
(thanks to Paul Templar for this one)
Vhailor: "Let my words carry you: JUSTICE is a TEACHER. In your PUNISHMENT, gain STRENGTH. Through your PUNISHMENT, achieve PERFECTION."
(thanks to HonorKnight)
Fall-from-Grace: "Simple minds... simple pleasures..."
Fall-from-Grace: Morte, what happened to your body?
Morte: Oh! I'm the head of Vecna!
Fall-from-Grace: Morte, with a vocabulary like yours, you should spend some time at the brothel...
Morte: Hohoho! The gods are merciful!
Fall-from-Grace: Morte, I'm curious... what happened to your body?
Morte: It's a long story involving the Head of Vecna. I don't want to talk about it.
Fall-from-Grace: (Laughing) That was you?
Morte: Could we *please* change the subject?
(thanks to The Greater Quasit)
Ravel: "What can change the nature of a man?"
Ravel: Life swallowed you and spit you out!
Morte: It swallowed him, but I don't know if he came out of THAT end!
Ignus: "Ignus wishes to BURN!"
Fhjull Forked-Tongue: "Great! Even more of a stench!" - referring to Fall-from-Grace
Fhjull Forked-Tongue: "HOW CAN A MORON TALK SO MUCH?!"
Fhjull Forked-Tongue: "He it was that condemned me to this life and he whose guts I will see stringing the gates of dawn like a celestial harp... no... no... no harm to the deva. Curses!"
Fhjull Forked-Tongue: "That skulking pseudo-child of light! That contemptible... aggh... I mean no harm to him and his lying no-respect-for-the-law ways!"
The Transcendent One: "I can forge planes with my power! I can unmake you!"
The Silent King: "..."
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Mr. President
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The leaves that are green turn to brown
Jul 2001 time: 15:21
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I know this thread mainly has video game quotations, but I think we could be enlightened by some Magic: the Gathering flavor text quotations, some of which are cool-sounding and a few of which are even slightly amusing. (The bold is the name of the card, the italics is the quote in question.)
Juzam Djinn:
"Expect my visit when the darkness comes. The night I think is best for hiding all." -- Ouallada
Obsianus Golem:
"The foot stone is connected to the ankle stone, the ankle stone is connected to the leg stone . . ." -- Song of the Artificer
Dwarven Miner:
"Fetch the pestridder, Paka, we've got dwarves in the rutabagas!"
Reparations:
"Sorry I burned down your village. Here's some gold."
Grizzly Bears:
Don't try to outrun one of Dominia's Grizzlies; it'll catch you, knock you down, and eat you. Of course, you could run up a tree. In that case you'll get a nice view of the surrounding area before it knocks the tree down and eats you.
The Cheese Stands Alone:
The meat, on the other hand, receives frequent visitors.
Incinerate:
"Never taunt an embermage, 'What are you going to do about it?' " -- Akin, seasoned askari
Northern Paladin:
"Look to the north; there you will find aid and comfort." -- The Book of Tal
Wall of Wood:
Everyone knows that to ward off trouble, you knock on wood. But sometimes it's better to make a wall out of the wood and let trouble do the knocking.
Worship:
"Believe in the ideal, not the idol." -- Serra
Goblin Balloon Brigade:
"From up here we can drop rocks and arrows and more rocks!"
"Uh, yeah boss, but how do we get down?"
Goblin Digging Team:
"From down here we can make the whole wall collapse!"
"Uh, yeah boss, but how do we get out?"
Last edited by Mr. President on 02-10-2002 at 08:20
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