20-05-2003 04:53									#1
	"I would like her a lot more if she weren't Muslim" Inflate your Upload Space

I don't think this needs much explaining.

Once I've calmed down, can you help me figure out what to say to my mom?

	20-05-2003 04:55									#2
	Inflate your Upload Space

tell her you'll put her in the worst retirement home you can find unless she does exactly what you want

	20-05-2003 04:55									#3
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"She'd like you a lot more, too, if you weren't such a raging bigoted *****."

	20-05-2003 04:57									#4
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hmm... is this dealing with a friend or girlfriend? It may make a difference is how those words are percieved.

	20-05-2003 05:02									#5
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It seems a reasonable comment. I'd like a lot of people more if they weren't Muslims myself. The same could be said for a number of religions and people.

	20-05-2003 05:06									#6
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Well, positive thing is that she was honest. At least you know what she thinks, even if you didn't want to hear this. Maybe now you can talk with her and make it better.

	20-05-2003 05:07									#7
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"Well Mom, at least she IS related to Abraham." On second thought this could go down very badly... try it and see.

	20-05-2003 05:11									#8
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Friendships can be severed, you can have friends who are bigoted go away. It isn't as easy with family. You're angry, but whatever faults she has, remember she is only mom you have, and chances are you willing to be dealing with her a long time. Now it's not that loving relationships with closely related family members can't be severed, it's just that it is a lot more painful to do so. Keep that in mind when dealing with her.

	20-05-2003 05:20									#9
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Let's face it. People will always feel more comfortable around other's the consider "their kind". It's just human nature; that doesn't make it a good thing but it does make it understandable. Also since your family is Jewish this will make your parent's feel even stronger about you dating a muslim.

	20-05-2003 05:24									#10
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quote: Friendships can be severed, you can have friends who are bigoted go away. It isn't as easy with family. You're angry, but whatever faults she has, remember she is only mom you have, and chances are you willing to be dealing with her a long time. Now it's not that loving relationships with closely related family members can't be severed, it's just that it is a lot more painful to do so. Keep that in mind when dealing with her.

If family is bigoted, then jettison 'em I say. I don't care if it is more painful, if I'm choosing friend or family when someone in the family is bigotted, I'll side with friend any day.

	20-05-2003 05:26									#11
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How exactly do you define a muslim? How do you know he/she is not secularized and not all that much believes in one God as written in the Koran, hadiths etc etc...? Why does him being a muslim make it harder for you to like him/her? And so on.......

	20-05-2003 05:27									#12
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"We have both agreed to become atheist."

	20-05-2003 05:32									#13
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I'm not saying to cave in to them, Imran, but I strongly think jetissoning them is a very bad idea. Especially since JW is 14, if the relationship between him and his parents becomes stormy now it could be very bad for him...

	20-05-2003 05:32									#14
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quote: Also since your family is Jewish this will make your parent's feel even stronger about you dating a muslim.

I know of a few Jewish parents who would let there children date people from other religions including Muslims. in fact, tha'ts all of the Jews I know!
(don't know that many..) Is'nt that related to as of how Ortodox you are? and what values you are raised and believe in?

	20-05-2003 05:36									#15
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Just pull the reverse guilt trip... You know... the line they always usually use to zing you...

Just say...

"Mom, I really expected better from you"...

	20-05-2003 05:38									#16
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Be honest with your mother: tell her you like this person, and that their religion matters nothing to you. Ask her not to say such a thing in front of you ever again, then tell her you love her (your mom), and be done with it.

	20-05-2003 05:41									#17
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Why does the post count read 0?

	20-05-2003 05:50									#18
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A data base error... there is a thread about it in the community forum.

	20-05-2003 06:11									#19
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quote: Originally posted by St Leo "We have both agreed to become atheist."

This in my opinion is the only sensable way to approach things.

	20-05-2003 06:13									#20
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Actually, it does need more explanation, but I love some of the knee jerk reactions. :simpsons voice HAAHAA:

If you want my invaluable advice I need details of the situation (pictures are good too).

	20-05-2003 06:15									#21
	Lose 30 kilos (of popups)

quote: Especially since JW is 14

He's only 14?! Wow... I didn't know that. Damn, I forget we have younguns here .

Of course we have no idea if this is just a friend or a love interest.

	20-05-2003 06:17									#22
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quote: Originally posted by Shi Huangdi I'm not saying to cave in to them, Imran, but I strongly think jetissoning them is a very bad idea. Especially since JW is 14, if the relationship between him and his parents becomes stormy now it could be very bad for him...

JW is 14? Then he most certainly shouldn't get to worked up about this since she most likely won't be in the picture one year from now. Stick with your parents and just try to influence them to come around to your POV.

	20-05-2003 06:17									#23
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Exactly who is this person? just a friend or what?

Just as an aside, Moslems are forbidden from marrying non-God believers... they're not supposed to marry Buddhists, Hindus, Confucians, athiests etc.

	20-05-2003 06:24									#24
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a man of jewish religion falling in love with a muslim and feeling guitly about it?

	20-05-2003 06:30									#25
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paiktis, that is what these families do to you. It's utter Hell. Though the Jews are more advanced in this than the Muslims. They might dissaprove, but they'll let you do it.

	20-05-2003 06:35									#26
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Imran:

Muslims have had a far, far greater tradition of marrying non-muslims than jews have had of marrying non-jews. Only since Israel was created have muslims almost universally started to hate jews.

	20-05-2003 06:37									#27
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quote: Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui paiktis, that is what these families do to you. It's utter Hell. Though the Jews are more advanced in this than the Muslims. They might dissaprove, but they'll let you do it.

generalizing, generalizing

	20-05-2003 06:39									#28
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quote: Originally posted by Albert Speer Imran: Muslims have had a far, far greater tradition of marrying non-muslims than jews have had of marrying non-jews. Only since Israel was created have muslims almost universally started to hate jews.

Only since Israel was created have muslims almost universally started to hate Israelis.

Spot the difference?

	20-05-2003 06:42									#29
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quote: Muslims have had a far, far greater tradition of marrying non-muslims than jews have had of marrying non-jews.

Perhaps, but Jews in the US are more liberal minded than Muslims in the US. Jews are MUCH more likely to date out of their own religion than Muslims in this country.

	20-05-2003 06:49									#30
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Imran:

Really? My father married a christian... my step-father did too... all his friends who married in america are married to christians (catholic puerto ricans usually).

still if what you say is true then I think it's economics... jews being so much higher economically than muslims are more likely to interact with people out of their own kind while poorer muslims immigrants i guess would keep to themselves.

Also as an aside, i know some christians who refuse to date anyone who's not christian. the reason is because they want God to be a major part of their lives and they don't want to have fights over what will happen on sundays.