23-11-2003 08:42									#271
	Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

You could. Unfortunately, you got rid of everything else in your mind at the same time. So you become a vegetable.

I wish I didn't need to eat to remain alive.

	23-11-2003 10:13									#272
	Increase Your PM Length

Do to lack of critical amino acids, you brain shuts down. You are now a vegetable.

I wish I could log onto Apolyton every night, read every post I'm interested in, and still get everything else done that I need to do.

Last edited by shawnmmcc on 23-11-2003 at 10:20

	23-11-2003 10:26									#273
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization III: Complete

Granted. Your definition of stuff that "needs to be done" soon only consists of Posting on Poly.

I wish my clothes washed themseves and my house cleaned itself too.

	23-11-2003 10:36									#274
	Get a bigger avatar today!

Granted. However your house soon deems you to be causing the mess, and throws you out.

I wish I was a truck and could run people over and blame the driver!

	23-11-2003 12:19									#275
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization 2

granted. however, you're the only one made, and you're a ford. you'll get recalled eventually.

i wish someone would shut my downstairs neighbors up. they're having noisy sex again.

Last edited by self biased on 23-11-2003 at 15:32

	23-11-2003 20:21									#276
	Support Apolyton or Terrorists Win

Granted. However your neighbors invited some friends over for b/s/m, and gag your neighbors. But the friends are even louder and more disgusting.

I wish a beautiful woman (alive, my age, heterosexual, horny) would appear on my lap.

	23-11-2003 20:24									#277
	Support Apolyton, buy Galactic Civilizations

Granted, but she's not interested in you. Not the slightest bit. In fact, she's annoyed wrt to the fact that she's dragged from whatever activity she was enjoying to drop into your lap, and slaps you a few.

I wish I could invent feasible fusion power.

	23-11-2003 21:06									#278
	Avatar Enlargement: We've got the solution

you do. it just so happens, though, that it's in a small little pill that you can plug into. great, right? it's portable, and requires only water.
unfortunately, one day when you wake up, you mistake it for your suppository, and it explodes, causing you a raging case of the painful runs, which happens to be rather permanent.

i wish we could have a 'poly thread that reaches over 1000 posts and 10000 views.

	23-11-2003 21:29									#279
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

You've got it, but it's a bug. You can't reach any other page on the web and keep posting a new answe"r to that thread and view it until you reach several thousands.

I wish I could teleport home instead of taking the train.

	23-11-2003 21:36									#280
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

Granted. Unfortunately, the side-effect of the power causes you to lose interest in sex completely.

I wish I could shapechange into any other person, without any detrimental effect to myself.

	23-11-2003 21:41									#281
	Support Apolyton, buy Alpha Centauri

congratulations!
unfortunately, your brain gets stuck and from now on you can only change into one other person.

who ends up being richard simmons.



i wish i had the brains of a thousand geniuses, the muscles of a thousand hercules, and the good looks of a thousand devilishly attractive handsom young men.

	23-11-2003 21:51									#282
	Suffering from ads?

quote: i wish i had the brains of a thousand geniuses, the muscles of a thousand hercules, and the good looks of a thousand devilishly attractive handsom young men.

Granted. Suddenly, your house is filled with the brains and muscles of two thousand guys. Also your hard drive is now full of a thousand male pr0n stars.

I wish I had a billion dollars.

	23-11-2003 21:52									#283
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization 2

[Damn, too slow.]

You have a billion dollars, but you got arrested because that's drug money.

I wish for the cure for cancer.

	24-11-2003 00:55									#284
	Support Apolyton, buy Civilization: The Boardgame

congratulations! you have the cure for cancer. it only makes one person happy in all of your cities, however, and since you have no cities, it's utterly useless.

i wish sco would just vanish.

	24-11-2003 03:05									#285
	Increase the size of your Attachments

Granted, but SCO's lawsuits are upheld in the courts, and now no one can use LINUX.

I wish I wasn't always so tired.

	24-11-2003 04:05									#286
	Put an end to popups!

Granted!

Now you need to go for runs at 4am just to find something to do.

I wish my girlfiend could come up with me for the holidays.

	24-11-2003 04:20									#287
	Got spare money?

She does, but only to tell you she is running off with her personal trainer.

I wish I was always right.

	24-11-2003 05:10									#288
	Support Apolyton, buy Galactic Civilizations: Deluxe Edition

Granted. Now, no-one likes you or will talk to you!


I wish registering cars didn't cost so much.

	24-11-2003 05:31									#289
	Support Apolyton, buy Alpha Centauri

Granted, but now the streets are clogged with cars and no one can get anywhere.

I wish I didn't have to go make dinner.

	24-11-2003 07:18									#290
	Inflate your Upload Space

You don't. However now you starve to death.

I wish...I dunno. I wish for whatever Che wishes.

	24-11-2003 07:27									#291
	Increase the size of your Attachments

Granted. You slowly become a puppet of che

I wish I have telepathy that can be used on any person I so choose.

	24-11-2003 07:33									#292
	Suffering from ads?

Granted.
As your walking down the street, you run into a really hot lady. You use your telepathy on her...and can't use it on anyone else! She thinks your a nerd and politely excuses herself.

I wish I had a huge Russian flag flying outside my house.

	24-11-2003 08:58									#293
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

Granted. Of course, you live in America. Can anyone say "witch-hunts"?

I wish I could come up with an economic system that was fair, provided motivation for people to work, encouraged competition and change, and didn't force anyone to starve or go without clothes/shelter.

	24-11-2003 09:23									#294
	Support Apolyton buy from Amazon

Granted, but you become a marked man, forever fleeing from assassins.

I wish I had x-ray vision that I could use to see through clothes

	24-11-2003 09:27									#295
	Enter the AD-FREE zone

granted. unfortunately, you're stuck in an airport indefinitely, surrounded by the st. andrew's senior citizen's world tour group... so you get to see nothing but aarp-grade fannies.

i wish broadband was cheaper in the states.

	25-11-2003 06:27									#296
	Got spare money?

as you wish. now broadband is 50% cheaper, but since people no longer communicate face-to-face and the art of actual art of human conversation has gone the way of written correspondence and society wit, American literature, Berkeley Breathed and stand-up comedy all go down the old flusheroo.

Oh wait, that's not that much of a corruption. Oh well.

I wish I was witty and eloquent.

	25-11-2003 06:32									#297
	Browse Apolyton AD-FREE

congratulations. you are now fez.

i wish i wish i could have sex with a beautiful woman and have her enjoy it, too, for every night of the rest of my life.

	25-11-2003 06:37									#298
	Support Apolyton, buy Call to Power 2

Granted. And she only services 7 other men before getting to you each night.


I wish my bag of M&Ms was not empty.

	25-11-2003 07:05									#299
	Get a bigger avatar today!

You look inside and find it still has a few crumbs in it
I wish....I wish I was having fun right now BUT not by pleasuring myself

	25-11-2003 07:49									#300
	Inflate your Upload Space

Granted, now you are a hamster running around on a wheel

I wish I could win all my gambling bets